People are as puppets only my strings have been cut

[Fridgemagnetman]

First post - hello

I came up with this sentence years ago to try and describe my world experience.
Thought it was depression or something at the time.

My wife recently said I had aspergers, I always thought there was something, didn't know what - ironically I knew all about aspergers since mid 80'September. Fascinated by it but didn't apply it to myself!

A lot of pieces seem to fit now. Sort of feel relieved and reluctant. Reluctant as I don't want to go through my whole history (again) and attach another interpretation to it.
45 now.

So the puppet thing....... was more my impression like 'what are all these people doing? What for? (Ie a normal social situaion,people talking to each other)
I'm sort of thinking 'what's going on here? What are they all doing?
Hence my feeling that I'm not animated in some way like the other people are......

My strings are cut.

Although from my perspective now I would not try to repair the strings, even though each day can be going though seven kinds of he'll which no one knows about as my face is still passive. If I try to explain I end up feeling even worse....
Try and smile and say something so they stop asking or don't ask in the first place.

These puppets are everywhere..... I don't know what they're doing or why or even if they know themselves.

 

[xudo]

Welcome

I very much like your puppet analogy

 

[jamesaldrin]

I also used to think that my Aspergers was depression. Although I might have depression too.

I like the puppet analogy too. There was a quote from a documentary about Aspergers that it reminds me of.
"“Somebody described it to me once as an Aspie and a neurotypical standing side by side, and they hear the beating of hooves on the ground, and the neurotypical person will automatically say “Those are horses'” and the Aspie might say “Well whose to say it’s not zebras?””
(

)

It feels like neurotypicals' emotional reactions and body language are all predetermined by puppet strings; our strings have been snipped with a scissor.

 

[Guppyfry]

Hi welcome - I get what you are saying. The feeling of being paralized with the inability to act. But interestingly, when I read your subject line, I was thinking that people are puppets - their actions are controlled by subconscious social expectations. As aspies, we are free of those strings, we are emancipated from those outer controls.

So you can put a positive spin on the cut strings. You are your own person, you follow your own patch, you have greater freedom to be yourself. Maybe like Pinocchio, we are more alive because we have not strings for others to control us with.

 

[Fridgemagnetman]

What a great spin on it

I'll pretend that's what I meant from now

 

[Rocco]

Welcome aboard
That was a well written/thought out introduction. Glad to have you apart of the community here.
Best wishes,
Rocco