OK, this is a bit of nonsense coming from my mother.

[Metalhead]

My mother admitted to me that she always believed my childhood meltdowns due to sensory issues or due to me being bullied at school were choices I was actively making and that nobody should take my side of any issue seriously because of that.

She probably knows she is lying about all of that, but who am I to call her out on her nonstop lies?

I need a shot of NyQuil right now so I can pass out and forget about all of this for a while.

 

[autism-and-autotune]

a bit of nonsense? My pal, that's a lot of nonsense. I'm sorry you had to go through what you went through. I too have a very difficult mother and she doesn't even know I have autism.

 

[Knower of nothing]

" but who am I to call her out on her nonstop lies?"
The only one to do it that's who.

 

[Mr. Stevens]

She sounds like my mom, who will always wish for another son. And I'm okay with that. She's not exactly what I want either.

 

[The Pandector]

Don’t know, but suspect most people operate on the assumption that the other guy is wired like they are. In her limited experience, only a conscious decision could result in that behavior.

I raised my children according to personal responsibility, then many years later, self diagnosed. Now, I’m not as quick to assign fault. As a Christian, I’ve always struggled with anger towards my mother. Now I see that she was another snowed-under autistic person trying to cope.

Angering as the suggestion may be, forgiveness is the cleanest solution, and I do that best when I can understand. Maybe your mother is that viciously cruel, but maybe she just can’t wrap her head around what you’re dealing with, and defaults to what she’s dealing with.

 

[Lysholm]

This is great news. Now you know that your mother's reactions weren't because there was something "wrong" with you, but because there is something wrong with her. She chose to react incredibly inappropriately to her child's needs and leveraged her parental authority to get others to do the same. A huge chunk of childhood guilt and shame has just been invalidated as cruel skit. Time to practice healing and move on. You can forgive, but don't say I recommended it.

 

[Aspychata]

Your mother is a true narcissist, in fact she is the poster parent used to explain the term. You can't believe anything she says.