My parents constantly arguing

[Adder1234]

Every single night, my mom and sometimes my dad get drunk and then have a huge argument that involves shouting loud enough to be heard by the nieghbours(who live almost a kilometer away), crying and then blaming each other and me and my sister for every problem that they've ever had. They're been getting worse lately, but everytime I try and bring it up when they're sober they refuse to even admit that they argue. It's getting to the point where they're threatening to kill one another. No body outside my family wants to be involved and I have no clue what I can do about it. The terrible thing is that they still love each other, I just think that every slight problem throughout their marriage has finally caught up with them. Any one have any clue what I should do, other than try to ignore them?

 

[tree]

It sounds like you're saying your parents are alcoholic
and in denial. If you go to school, have you been to a
guidance or counseling person? There are groups for
children of alcoholic parents. Maybe, for a start, you
could check with school about a group like that.

 

[AGXStarseed]

Agreed with tree on this one.

Also, maybe try to get their drunken arguments on video - both so they have to face the issues because they can't deny it anymore and also so the footage can be studied later with a counsellor and steps taken to overcome the issues and improve yours and your parent's lives.
My [31M] wife [30F] secretly recorded our arguments with her phone: should I feel violated? • r/relationships

 

[Ylva]

Recording their arguments on your phone and replaying it to them later may not have the desired effect.

 

[Judge]

Welcome to Al-Anon Family Groups

 

[tree]

I think getting support before
attempting anything confrontational
would be the better way to go.

 

[toothless]

Recording their arguments on your phone and replaying it to them later may not have the desired effect.

i agree with this ylva,me and my sister did this on a camcorder- my mum has been a violent alcoholic since i was 5 as she had no support and developed severe depression, we recorded her doing violent behaviors- when shes sober shes one of the nicest people i know but she has always denied her behavior and in this instance she became violent towards me in an attempt to break the camera.

adder1234, i recommend going to a 12 step program for people of your age group [sorry i dont know your age] al anon is good my dad went to them for a while but his work shifts got in the way.
as a damaged 33 year old,i now go to a ACOA [adult child of alcoholics] meeting with a support staff who had been a heroin and alcohol addict in her younger years-and her faetal alcohol spectrum disorder+high functioning 25 yr old autistic and brain injured son,whose dad is still a raging alcoholic,me and him get on great we are good mates,its good to know someone in the same situation and i highly recommend it.

for him,he cant cope with the pressure of going to meetings every week but for me,they will teach me to let go of feeling like i caused her alcoholism and that i cant control anything she does so i have to look to my higher power-and you are allowed to define what that means yourself in 12 step programs.

the only issue for me is the material they give out every meeting that you have to follow is a wall of text,with a lot of complex language and no pictorials supporting the language,but that shouldnt be an issue for you as an aspie [apart from the walls of text,i think they do that to get as much words put in as possible].

 

[Adder1234]

thanks guys. My school doesn't really have a support group, mostly because if it did 70% of the school would be in it. But I've organised to see the school councilor next week.