Is this a "me" thing, or an ASD thing?

[Cerulean]

Yeah that's a good one. And if I'm with others, I'll pop down all their buttons too. So satisfying!

 

[Simply a Bibliophile]

I'm assuming most of us Aspies could count their number of friends on one hand. Does anyone end up feeling a little possessive of said friend, when you see or hear about them doing something without you, you feel kind of left out. I usually have to tell myself, "hey, listen, you're not his only friend you can't expect him to have his world revolve around you." This flares up for me when i'm with my friend and he starts texting, it almost makes me feel i'm not being entertaining enough.

Also, does it take a lot for you to call someone a "friend"? I have only one person i can honestly call a friend, and at least one other person who can call me a friend but i cant do the same for her, it's almost like the feeling when people say "love". They place a strong meaning on the word, i place the same meaning on "friend".

I've pretty much changed the meaning of friend for myself. I have many people (at least a dozen) whose company I enjoy while studying. I can just sit with them and not say anything. We don't know much about each other, but most people I'd give motions for them to GET AWAY because I have an intense sense of personal space. When someone asks me who my "friends" are, I rattle off a list of these people.

I have had 7 very intense best-friendships in my life, and none of them have ended well, which is why I've given up the practice. They probably all ended so badly because I was so possessive, almost like a crazy girlfriend. ("Why do you like her so much? I'm still your best friend right? You don't hang out with her as much as you hang out with me, right?") I bond best through a screen, even if I know the person in real life.

 

[Cerulean]

OK lately I've noticed myself being super startled at every little noise. Right now my dad's in the next room eating with a regular metal fork on a ceramic plate, and every time he taps it I about jump out of my skin. Even if I'm expecting it it's no better. I've had to change radio songs because the beat is too pronounced, even peoples' voices give me a little adrenaline jolt when they start speaking. I'm wondering if this is a new delightful part of my sensory issues or if I'm just super-tense and not aware of it. Does anyone else get these little startle-jolts of adrenaline?

 

[Simply a Bibliophile]

OK lately I've noticed myself being super startled at every little noise. Right now my dad's in the next room eating with a regular metal fork on a ceramic plate, and every time he taps it I about jump out of my skin. Even if I'm expecting it it's no better. I've had to change radio songs because the beat is too pronounced, even peoples' voices give me a little adrenaline jolt when they start speaking. I'm wondering if this is a new delightful part of my sensory issues or if I'm just super-tense and not aware of it. Does anyone else get these little startle-jolts of adrenaline?

My sister used to have very bad allergies and it would set me on edge every time that she snorted her nose. I kept begging and begging her to use tissues but she never would. It got very bad, to the point where I was told I would be in serious trouble if I kept yelling at her every time she did it.

 

[buckyboy14]

Is anybody else an extremely picky eater? There are very few things that I will comfortably eat, and I'm often afraid to try new foods.

 

[Soup]

I am, Buckyboy! Not as much as I was as a kid but I'm still very particular. As for new foods, there has to be several familiar features to it. if it is completely alien to me, I figure I can probably live a full & healthy life without it.

 

[Deno]

Is anybody else an extremely picky eater? There are very few things that I will comfortably eat, and I'm often afraid to try new foods.

I am for sure. I didn't really think I was until people start suggesting foods, and i turn most of them down, haha.
Cheese is no good unless on cheese toast, Lazagna, or pizza. I hate mushrooms, peaches, pineapple, brussel sprouts, cauliflower, rice, and much more.

 

[wyverary]

I nearly flipped my biscuit the first time I saw this comic:

xkcd: Iambic Pentameter

It doesn't usually make its way into actual conversation, but I have a habit of rephrasing everything--and I mean EVERYTHING--I hear into iambic pentameter: Movie/TV show dialogue, what other people say, what I say or think, what I read...I'm guessing most Aspies have such mental tics, but when I tell people about this habit they look at me like I'm wearing a tinfoil hat or something.

 

[Simply a Bibliophile]

Is anybody else an extremely picky eater? There are very few things that I will comfortably eat, and I'm often afraid to try new foods.

Biggest problem with the ASD, and I'm not kidding by a long shot. Forget issues with friends, not making eye contract, etc., picking eating has been by far the most debilitating symptom for me.

Not only do I have to turn down pizza and any red meat (I barely eat fish, either, and I don't eat pork) I also don't eat cheese, tomatoes, meat sandwiches, turkey that has had any preservation or stewing done to it, beans, hummus...the list goes on. I feel like a child when I go out to eat, often I find myself trying to order "large" items off the kid's menu. I don't freak out if one food is touching another, but I'm very careful to separate things because some things I just can't eat together.

It's not just that, though. I used to have a terrible day care provider before my mum even expressed a curiosity about Asperger's. I used to just think there was something wrong with me because I had no friends or playmates and just holed up in a corner and read. I was always told that I needed to interact with people, which was quite frankly hell. All this would have been enough if the food had been fine, but I was constantly force-fed things that I hated, which, naturally, just made me hate them more. I would go on hunger strikes, sit at the table for hours on end refusing to eat, and, when all else failed, cry, but nothing ever worked. The last year or two, I got very nasty and subversive, trying to drive the provider up the wall as much as possible. It worked. I got kicked (fully on purpose) out the same year that my mum tried to have me diagnosed.

It would have been tolerable if it hadn't been for the food.

 

[kasmanaft08]

I've found that I often prefer to sit on the floor when I do things. (or bed, if it's a "lazy thing") I don't have any tables or couches, which my mom felt was a bit strange, and my living room is virtually empty. Ive always done this though, find weird little spots (right now it's my kitchen) and I sit on the floor, have coffee and read/organise things/whatever. Anyone else do the unconventional nest thing?

 

[Soup]

I can't stand most upholstery & can't let it touch my skin: even just my hands. I am only comfortable on leather seats (NOT leatherette or vinyl!). Even cars with fabric upholstery creep me out & I view all microfibre sofas, jacquard fabric chairs & any other upholstery besides leather with deep suspicion & doubt. Firstly, it smells funny. Every time & I don't care how much Febreeze people try to disguise the smell with. Even when spotless & brand new it smells & feels 'off' & feels wrong.

 

[smith2267]

I'm so glad the fabric sensitivities have skipped me. I have textures I enjoy, like women's panty hose or stucco walls. But none that I hate. As far as food goes, I have trouble eating fish...when I was 18 and went away to college, I would have starved if not for beer and candy bars. The cafeteria food was horrible.

 

[Soup]

Panty hose?!? I can't even touch them. Even thinking about them freaks me out. they cling to the body, then stretch & zing back. They don't breathe & imitate skin. They're itchy & slinky all at the same time. Then, they go up over your hips like Super Man tights. No can do. Even the ones that go thigh high that either stay up due to a silicone band or using a jarretiere, feel like my legs are imprisoned doing hard time. I really gave them the college try but I'd wind up stimming in some wash room aggressively tearing the things off. No nylon, polyester, microfibre or any other synthetic for moi!

 

[smith2267]

Ha. I don't wear them--I'm not a cross dresser. But when I was a little kid I used to rub women's legs if they had panty hose on

 

[Soup]

I remember thinking that my mother's panty hose were a horrible skin deformity that we just never spoke of. I'd seen those stretchy skinned people on TV & thought my mother was one of them. Then, I'd be terrified that, any day, my skin would begin stretching out too! To reinforce this, she has one of those creepy fake bikinis that had a skin-like beige stretchy part attaching the top to the bottom so I was further convinced that she had some awful rare disease!!!

 

[rolo]

Panty hose?!? I can't even touch them. Even thinking about them freaks me out. they cling to the body, then stretch & zing back. They don't breathe & imitate skin. They're itchy & slinky all at the same time. Then, they go up over your hips like Super Man tights. No can do. Even the ones that go thigh high that either stay up due to a silicone band or using a jarretiere, feel like my legs are imprisoned doing hard time. I really gave them the college try but I'd wind up stimming in some wash room aggressively tearing the things off. No nylon, polyester, microfibre or any other synthetic for moi!

They look great though- now all I have to do is find a lovely lady to wear them for me!

On a sensible note I am having problems wearing any clothes today-everything feels wet and clingy- I feel unclean-I don't know why it happens- I am wearing the same jeans that were washed and the same T shirt but they feel disgusting!!

 

[Soup]

I feel the same way too sometimes! Clammy & gross despite knowing I'm showered & fresh. What helps me in this case is to fill the tub with hot (not scalding) water, add an abundance of salt: sea salt or epsom salt, not those cutesy dyed or perfumed 'girly' bath salts & soak for a while. After draining the tub, I use a microfibre exfoliating cloth to scrub & then rinse myself off. I drink cold water in the hot bath but that may be a 'me' thing. After that, I'll lie on my towel for a good 15 mins before drying off & dressing. THEN, I feel 100% clean: no more clammy feeling. I think sometimes we may feel unclean beneath the skin & salt feels like it's vacuum suctioning out invisible gunk we sense.

 

[kasmanaft08]

I get the feeling the fabric-pickiness is a pretty normal Aspie thing.

I tend to like soft, heavy fabric (like fur blankets and velvet chairs, ideally). Anything leathery and plastic-like tends to feel awkward and sticky to me.

As for clothes, I have a problem wearing things that are too loose actually- anything baggy that brushes against me is annoying. For some reason tighter clothes and heavier layers feel much better. I hate summer clothes.

 

[Arashi222]

Is being bad with finaces or money an ASD trait or not?

So I have been wondering . Is having trouble with money something that people with AS and other ASD's struggle with? Or is it individually based? I know from my schooling that people who suffer from other disorders like OCD, Or bipolar, or addictions often have issues with money due to the symptoms of their disorder. So My thought is that my inability to understand money is due to AS. I have a math integration disorder that also I think contributes but I wonder if it is often associated as a symptom of AS? Anyone else have money issues and if so do they believe that it is part of the AS or another disorder or unrelated?

 

[. . .]

Re: Is being bad with finaces or money an ASD trait or not?

Yes, I'd say it's an ASD trait. Most people on the spectrum just don't care much at all about money which I believe is why they tend to suck at managing it.