Introductions

[JayLapointe]

Hi,
I noticed I was included in a recent birthday post, so I figured it was time I properly introduced myself. My name’s Jay—just Jay, not short for Jason.

I received my autism diagnosis a few years ago, in my early 40s. It took some time to process what that meant. At first, I resisted the idea because I assumed it implied something was “wrong” with me. Eventually, I came to understand that it’s not a flaw—it simply means I experience and interpret the world a bit differently than most people.

I’m still learning what that means day to day, but I’m starting to see it less as a label and more as a framework for understanding myself. I’m particularly interested in hearing how others have navigated that existential identity shift that comes with a late diagnosis, and how they’ve come to terms with that new sense of self.

I’m glad to be here, and I’m looking forward to learning from everyone and contributing where I can.

J

 

[Tired]

Hello and welcome.

May I ask why you used an AI to write this introduction for you?

 

[FayetheADHDsquirrel]

@Tired Why do you think it's AI?

 

[FayetheADHDsquirrel]

@JayLapointe Welcome to the forum.

 

[Tired]

@Tired Why do you think it's AI?

The way it was written irked my "that's AI text" sense, then I checked it out with special websites (where your paste the text and it tells you if it is ai or human written) and yup, AI.

 

[717]

@Tired Why do you think it's AI?

It really looks like AI...

 

[Neonatal RRT]

I’m particularly interested in hearing how others have navigated that existential identity shift that comes with a late diagnosis, and how they’ve come to terms with that new sense of self.

I’m glad to be here, and I’m looking forward to learning from everyone and contributing where I can.

J

Welcome J,

I wasn't diagnosed until I was 52... so I had a lot of time to slowly realize how different I was. It was like I always had a sense that "something was off", but never being able to put a finger on it. I was never really one to discuss myself, what I was thinking to others, difficulties, frustrations, etc... it was never a part of any conversation... so I had no idea that I wasn't like everyone else. I was just frustrated at times that socializing and friends just seemed to come easily to other people. It was never a situation where people were telling me they didn't like me... I got along well with everyone... but I was never able to make that connection where I was someone's "best friend"... there was always this disconnect with people. So, after some 50 years of just accepting that I will never have that level of connection... but still able to have "good acquaintances" and friendly relationships... that's all I really need in my life.

Finally, a co-worker... a mother of an autistic son... had mentioned to me privately that her son and I had a lot of common traits. That conversation sparked me to take one of those on-line "Aspie" tests... and I was scoring at the far end of the scale... so I took a different one... the same results... and a different one again... the same results. OK... time for a professional to look at things. Sure enough... language like "severe" was in the written in the report. Fair enough... I am autistic. What does that mean?

Then the classic autistic "deep dive" into the topic... all things autism... steep learning curve... but it explained my life. I felt relieved... almost content with myself at that point. This is who I am. This is why I am the way I am. Handy information. Self-awareness is a powerful thing. Coming to terms with my autism... easy. Other people coming to terms with my autism... not so easy. My wife took a few years. My mother and siblings flat out rejected the idea. My co-workers, in general, didn't know how to respond... mostly blank looks not knowing what to say... but the relationships didn't change at all. My physician was a little confused, as well. Keep in mind that for a lot of people who are over 40 knew autism as a severe, debilitating, childhood condition... not something that "functional" adults could have. What they knew of autism and what they were seeing in me didn't match up.

To this day, we throw around the term "autism" in the media, politics, etc... but the overwhelming majority of people have no idea what that term means, nor the ways it manifests itself, or what "the spectrum" actually means. I can deal with people, in general. I can deal with myself, in general. What needs to happen is a very open and public discussion of what autism is, how it can present, how others can help, and how we can help. I said this to my wife of 40 years yesterday... "We are on completely different wavelengths, have different strengths and weaknesses, but the reason we have a strong relationship is that we complement each other as a team." So, I am thinking this needs to happen on a much larger scale... within the broader public realm... that there are many things neurotypicals are better at... but also many things autistics are better at... so let's get together and complement each other as a team, using each other's strengths and filling in the gaps.

 

[JayLapointe]

Hello and welcome.

May I ask why you used an AI to write this introduction for you?

I have a habit of rambling and poor grammar. I correct with AI. I wasn't intending to upset anyone. I find it helps me communicate better online. Particularly when I'm very anxious about a post. If I missed a rule about that I apologize and I'll try to work at making sure I don't get caught in a ramble and not use it in the futre.

 

[Xinyta]

Welcome @JayLapointe

To address the OP. I am finding, myself, that the labels and socail implications of such have little affect on much outside jobs and judgy socail clicks. Most will not look at you as something to avoid, or feel sorry for, unless you present a reason for it. We all are people at the end of the day. Unique, gifted, and our own individuals.

I have a habit of rambling and poor grammar. I correct with AI. I wasn't intending to upset anyone. I find it helps me communicate better online. Particularly when I'm very anxious about a post. If I missed a rule about that I apologize and I'll try to work at making sure I don't get caught in a ramble and not use it in the futre.

I'd not worry about it too much. Using AI to clean up messages you want to post isn't a bad thing. It's just that people who know what to look for in posts generated by AI will note this. They are not offended by it, unless they state otherwise.

I find that I can ramble and repeat myself some, if there is something I really want to get out, out of excitement or frustration. But it takes just looking at what I wrote and adjusting it to sound better. Or redo it if it just is too disjointed.

 

[717]

Hi,
I noticed I was included in a recent birthday post, so I figured it was time I properly introduced myself. My name’s Jay—just Jay, not short for Jason.

I received my autism diagnosis a few years ago, in my early 40s. It took some time to process what that meant. At first, I resisted the idea because I assumed it implied something was “wrong” with me. Eventually, I came to understand that it’s not a flaw—it simply means I experience and interpret the world a bit differently than most people.

I’m still learning what that means day to day, but I’m starting to see it less as a label and more as a framework for understanding myself. I’m particularly interested in hearing how others have navigated that existential identity shift that comes with a late diagnosis, and how they’ve come to terms with that new sense of self.

I’m glad to be here, and I’m looking forward to learning from everyone and contributing where I can.

J

Hi welcome to forums. I am not offended by the AI, I was just agreeing that it looked like AI... AI is a reality of our world and we will see more and more people using it. I probably should be using it too, to be honest.

To your post:

I have not being officially diagnose and I probably never will. In my case it will be a long and expensive process with little to none benefit. The benefit would be the validation of knowing for sure what is wrong with me. The problem with my self diagnose is that I will never know for sure, and this comes to the risk that I maybe not be actually autistic but also that I would no know what is my real diagnose...

Autism anyway does check all the boxes so far, so is what makes the most sense to me.

On life style little to none have really changed, I already knew there are some fabrics that I dont like to wear, I already knew I like the lights low, I already knew I dont like crowded places, and so on and go on... I would say I am high masking, I already figured out how to do that on my own...

My goals in this forums are to learn more about autism, to learn tricks how to deal better with it in a practical way... and maybe try to fix the ugly design language of the autistic community.