Introduction

[Triad531]

Hello everyone,
I just joined this site. I don't know for sure, but think I may have Asperger's. I am a 30 year old man. I have always been sensitive to noises and social situations. I am obsessed with music. I obsessively practiced guitar growing up (clarinet and saxophone too), nowadays piano. I have 1,500 vinyl records of every genre. I think this is a stronger obsession than a normal person.

I have a degree in accounting and worked for about 4 or 5 years as an accountant. I was fired from my job because I just wasn't interested and had no interest in making friends with co-workers. I have fewer and fewer friends and have recently had a fight with my parents that may be the last one. I can't talk to them about my problems anymore. I've had 2 girlfriends. The first one was when I was 23 for over a year. The second one was when I was 25 and lasted until this June. I really got along with her and her family and she had me buy an engagement ring but then broke up with me. I have never had close friends other than her and my life is crazy now.

I was going back to school last year to be a music teacher but have decided against it for personal reasons. I found another job in accounting that I start on Monday. I feel very alone and just want to find a community that I can relate to.

 

[Isadoorian]

Welcome to the Site! I hope you make new friends and enjoy your stay in the process

 

[tree]

 

[Autistamatic]

Hi @Triad531
Hope you find what you're looking for here.

 

[disconnected]

Hello and welcome.

 

[Nitro]

Hi Triad531

 

[NicolePfisher]

Wow, a

Hello everyone,
I just joined this site. I don't know for sure, but think I may have Asperger's. I am a 30 year old man. I have always been sensitive to noises and social situations. I am obsessed with music. I obsessively practiced guitar growing up (clarinet and saxophone too), nowadays piano. I have 1,500 vinyl records of every genre. I think this is a stronger obsession than a normal person.

I have a degree in accounting and worked for about 4 or 5 years as an accountant. I was fired from my job because I just wasn't interested and had no interest in making friends with co-workers. I have fewer and fewer friends and have recently had a fight with my parents that may be the last one. I can't talk to them about my problems anymore. I've had 2 girlfriends. The first one was when I was 23 for over a year. The second one was when I was 25 and lasted until this June. I really got along with her and her family and she had me buy an engagement ring but then broke up with me. I have never had close friends other than her and my life is crazy now.

I was going back to school last year to be a music teacher but have decided against it for personal reasons. I found another job in accounting that I start on Monday. I feel very alone and just want to find a community that I can relate to.

Wow, a lot to unpack here.

So I don't think you were seeking confirmation of anything, but yeah, most people are that committed to anything. Vinyl records, I must say though, were a good choice given that they produce superior sound quality. I guess people do get committed to things like social media, but stuff like that is by design meant to be addictive--so I disqualify them as pure interests.

What a coincidence! I'm probably going to be fired from my job because I work instead of making friends at work. It's not like I'm a jerk, but I prefer being productive instead of being seen on cameras talking to associates for half-hours on end. I hate my job too but I do it.

Now that's funny: I am pursuing a degree in education right now but have as of late been doubting myself. I thinking of instead going for a degree in computer science.

I've never had many friends or have been a social person. Most people thought it was an issue, I never did. I felt fine. But golly gee did it never occur to any one that it was probably because I was on the spectrum--no there was something morally wrong with me. Point is having few friends is not an issue but if you can relate to having a, what should we call, diminished social need, take note of it because that isn't abnormal here. Personally, I came here only when I started feeling lonely.

I'm sorry about your mom and dad. Do you think things would be easier if they understood you were on the spectrum?

Don't worry about the gf thing. That's still more partners than a lot of us have had here. I'm sorry the last one ended like that.

I'm glad you found a new job, best of luck to you man. Got any worries you'd like to get off your chest about it before starting?

 

[Pats]

Hi Triad531, I hope you got your ring back. Welcome to this forum.

 

[TempeFan]

What a familiar story. I too have a degree in accounting. I 'm good with the numbers but have been fired over a dozen times because I messed up the curve by working instead of socializing. My parents haven't spoken to me all year. I ran out of friends when my best friend of 38 years dumped me right after I was diagnosed with Asperger's. I had some great relationships which ended after about 1 to 5 years with the other person abandoning me for no reason given. I'm twice divorced but third time's a charm. I'm 56 now, happily married, forcibly but comfortably retired, and doing great. Wish I had found this forum when I was your age. The answers and support I get here would have saved me a lot of heartache. Welcome.

 

[Triad531]

Wow, a

Wow, a lot to unpack here.

So I don't think you were seeking confirmation of anything, but yeah, most people are that committed to anything. Vinyl records, I must say though, were a good choice given that they produce superior sound quality. I guess people do get committed to things like social media, but stuff like that is by design meant to be addictive--so I disqualify them as pure interests.

What a coincidence! I'm probably going to be fired from my job because I work instead of making friends at work. It's not like I'm a jerk, but I prefer being productive instead of being seen on cameras talking to associates for half-hours on end. I hate my job too but I do it.

Now that's funny: I am pursuing a degree in education right now but have as of late been doubting myself. I thinking of instead going for a degree in computer science.

I've never had many friends or have been a social person. Most people thought it was an issue, I never did. I felt fine. But golly gee did it never occur to any one that it was probably because I was on the spectrum--no there was something morally wrong with me. Point is having few friends is not an issue but if you can relate to having a, what should we call, diminished social need, take note of it because that isn't abnormal here. Personally, I came here only when I started feeling lonely.

I'm sorry about your mom and dad. Do you think things would be easier if they understood you were on the spectrum?

Don't worry about the gf thing. That's still more partners than a lot of us have had here. I'm sorry the last one ended like that.

I'm glad you found a new job, best of luck to you man. Got any worries you'd like to get off your chest about it before starting?

I do worry about the girlfriend thing a lot. Mostly because I've tried dating again and just get ghosted after one date. I don't see any girl ever liking me again and I obsess about the past and how stable my life used to be.

I'm happy about my new job but also worried that I will not be good at the social game again. I am kind and funny but something is always lacking in the social department.

 

[clg114]

Welcome to AutismForums!

 

[Triad531]

What a familiar story. I too have a degree in accounting. I 'm good with the numbers but have been fired over a dozen times because I messed up the curve by working instead of socializing. My parents haven't spoken to me all year. I ran out of friends when my best friend of 38 years dumped me right after I was diagnosed with Asperger's. I had some great relationships which ended after about 1 to 5 years with the other person abandoning me for no reason given. I'm twice divorced but third time's a charm. I'm 56 now, happily married, forcibly but comfortably retired, and doing great. Wish I had found this forum when I was your age. The answers and support I get here would have saved me a lot of heartache. Welcome.

Very interesting my friend. I feel like I find knowledge every once in a while that I wish I would have had at younger ages because I maybe wouldn't have made mistakes. Do you have friends other than your wife?

 

[TempeFan]

Very interesting my friend. I feel like I find knowledge every once in a while that I wish I would have had at younger ages because I maybe wouldn't have made mistakes. Do you have friends other than your wife?

I am the wife. We have friends that we've known over the 2 decades that we've been together. Other people come and go.

 

[JustSomeGuy]

Hey man,
I'm new here too. I have a degree in engineering and have been working as such for the past 8 years. I also have no interest in my work and have no interest in coworkers. I just declined going to the Christmas party this year (who plans that in October...?), so we'll see if that pushes me closer to the chopping block.
I can relate to the parents thing...I blew up at mine about a year and a half ago. Still don't know how to fix that (or if I can/want to).
Here's to finding peace for both of us

 

[SusanLR]

Welcome Triad531.
Feel free to ask and talk about things here. It is a good place, I feel very comfortable
and check in every night. There's always something interesting and it takes the loneliness edge off.
I wasn't diagnosed until I was 58 and found this forum while searching for information on Aspergers.
No friends either. Single and no family.