Interesting Discussion: The economics of solitude and loneliness.

[Gerald Wilgus]

While economics is not a predictive science I follow it to see how economists see relationships in our world. Here is an article exploring the correlation between loneliness, isolation, and economic activity.
Alone and lonely: The economic cost of solitude | VOX, CEPR Policy Portal

 

[watersprite]

That is interesting, thanks @Gerald Wilgus .

“The ‘sweet spot’ seems to be large shares of the population meeting with friends, relatives, and co-workers on average on a weekly basis.”

I wish I had friends close-by/local. I have to be content with having lonly long-distance friends for now. I suspect more than a few are in the same situation.

 

[Markness]

That is interesting, thanks @Gerald Wilgus .

“The ‘sweet spot’ seems to be large shares of the population meeting with friends, relatives, and co-workers on average on a weekly basis.”

I wish I had friends close-by/local. I have to be content with having lonly long-distance friends for now. I suspect more than a few are in the same situation.

I have some local friends I made through pure luck. They just happen to enjoy or at least be respectful of geek/nerd culture. Most people in the culture I live in still think geeky/nerdy things are either “childish” at best and “Satanic” at worst. They still bully anyone who is different and think our interests is why we are depressed.

I really hope I will encounter a lonely geeky/nerdy girl who is looking for a lonely geeky/nerdy boy like me.

 

[Markness]

While economics is not a predictive science I follow it to see how economists see relationships in our world. Here is an article exploring the correlation between loneliness, isolation, and economic activity.
Alone and lonely: The economic cost of solitude | VOX, CEPR Policy Portal

I will read this when I get home from my walk in the park. This is an issue that’s often ignored or downplayed by society.

 

[Gerald Wilgus]

I have some local friends though pure luck. They just happen to enjoy or at least be respectful of geek/nerd culture. Most people in the culture I live in still think geeky/nerdy things are either “childish” at best and “Satanic” at worst. They still bully anyone who is different and think our interests is why we are depressed.

I really hope I will encounter a lonely geeky/nerdy girl who is looking for a lonely geeky/nerdy boy like me.

I hope that you will find that too. As I came out of my cage, I decided that my hobbies and interests, while being on the geeky/nerdy spectrum, were an expression of my enjoyment in the world, and eventually understood that if I was to encounter somebody who would accept me and my interests, I'd need to be open to a person who also enjoyed the world, whether through literature and the arts, or through activities. I hit the jackpot with my spouse.

 

[Gerald Wilgus]

But, back to the topic. Seems like a reasonable level of enngagement must keep people in a decent state of mind, so I wonder at societies that treat people as interchangeable and don't value them. I wonder at the economic hit that creates when quality of life issues are neglected?

 

[Au Naturel]

The amount of socialization a person needs varies from one person to the next, just as every other human trait varies. There's a bias towards the most typical level of need being what everyone needs. So, while this study may work for the average person it will not apply to people who are not in the middle of the hump of the bell curve for social need, those both at the high end of the need curve and at the low end.

 

[Ronald Zeeman]

I saw this theory just after graduating college late 1970's Now think their is something to it. Time to chat with my sister, her being an economist with a strong math background.

 

[Markness]

I forgot I posted in this thread. Sadly, I still don’t have a girlfriend.

 

[Gerald Wilgus]

I really hope I will encounter a lonely geeky/nerdy girl who is looking for a lonely geeky/nerdy boy like me.

“Don’t overlook the shy ones. Many of them genuinely appreciate sensitive, quirky guys like us — but you’ll only find them if you stay in the game instead of backing off at the first sign of discomfort.


Here’s the truth: small barriers are going to show up. A pause in the conversation, a moment of awkwardness, a misread cue — that’s normal. None of that is a sign to retreat.


Think of it like strength training: you build confidence by pushing ever so slightly past the edge of your comfort zone. Not a leap — just one small step further than last time.
Say hello. Make one comment. Ask one simple question. That’s all.


You don’t need to be smooth. You don’t need to be fearless. You just need to stay in the moment long enough for someone to actually see you. That’s exactly how it worked with my future spouse — tiny steps, repeated, even when I was anxious. And those steps added up into something real.

 

[Markness]

I know that I won’t get anywhere if I don’t make attempts. I’ve just haven’t had the best luck in interacting socially for many years now. I’ve had interactions that initially seemed like they would go somewhere, particularly with a woman I met in Austin and one I met in Round Rock in person over the summer this year, but in both cases, they stopped talking to me. It’s a vicious cycle that seems extremely difficult to overcome.

 

[Gerald Wilgus]

I know that I won’t get anywhere if I don’t make attempts. I’ve just haven’t had the best luck in interacting socially for many years now. I’ve had interactions that initially seemed like they would go somewhere, particularly with a woman I met in Austin and one I met in Round Rock in person over the summer this year, but in both cases, they stopped talking to me. It’s a vicious cycle that seems extremely difficult to overcome.

The hardest thing for me to accomplish was to develop a rapport to keep a date interested enough to see my vitality — the playful, curious, tender parts of me. That only happened twice, once in a relationship that failed, but worked during the crucible of a road trip where we had to solve problems from missing boots, distributor rotor failure, to having to remove ticks from her legs. But we laughed, had fun, and took a measure of each other. Yes, that was highly unusual, but, lightning struck and at the end of two weeks we were lovers in a committed relationship. It was so committed that we made a long distance relationship work until I completed research and could move to be with her. I really think that shared experiences worked for me . . . it brought a depth to our interaction.

 

[Markness]

The hardest thing for me to accomplish was to develop a rapport to keep a date interested enough to see my vitality — the playful, curious, tender parts of me. That only happened twice, once in a relationship that failed, but worked during the crucible of a road trip where we had to solve problems from missing boots, distributor rotor failure, to having to remove ticks from her legs. But we laughed, had fun, and took a measure of each other. Yes, that was highly unusual, but, lightning struck and at the end of two weeks we were lovers in a committed relationship. It was so committed that we made a long distance relationship work until I completed research and could move to be with her. I really think that shared experiences worked for me . . . it brought a depth to our interaction.

I think I can handle more ever since I got a BIPAP and the quality of my sleep improved. It’s also improved my mood a lot. I just still haven’t overcome the social isolation I’ve been plagued with for many years. I often feel like I am in the wrong place.

 

[Markness]

I know I need to think more positively and be okay being by myself but I still get the same feelings that made me depressed in the first place still eating at me.

I am starting to worry I am literally the only person who is currently going through this spell. I don’t see anyone else struggling with the same issue.