I'm having problems with my Warhammer 40k interest and need help

[Ya Boi]

I’ve been playing Warhammer 40k for years now and I should be excited about the new edition coming out. But recently I’ve been wondering if I should even continue the hobby.

I primarily play Deathwatch and I know we got a lot of good rules for 10th edition, but I still feel upset about what they did to the Deathwatch Veterans. To me, it felt like they were designed to fulfill needed roles (anti-infantry, objective holding, etc) by combining different weapons from their massive armory. And that was what I really liked about them, I enjoyed figuring out different squad compositions and how I would use them in battle. But now half their armory has been condensed into a single weapon profile, and the thing I liked most about them is practically gone. This is also upsetting because Deathwatch Vets are my primary infantry models and I lost a lot of strategies I used to use. I really hate this change and feel like it takes away what makes Deathwatch special, yet it feels like I’m the only one upset by it. Aside from a few people on Reddit, everyone I talked to has been ok with this change, saying that it makes games go faster since you don’t have to go through a bunch of different weapons each time they shoot. I get that it’s easier and helps games go faster, but I don’t think it should take up too much time and takes away what Deathwatch was built for in the first place. Yet no one seems to agree with me. And every time I try to talk about it with people in person it always goes the same way. I state the problem I have, they bring up how it’s better and lets games go faster, then the conversation changes before I can reply. I don’t know if I was doing something socially incorrect, like trying to butt into conversations I wasn’t a part of, or if they don’t care about it as much as I do; but this whole thing makes me feel awful. It makes me feel like I’m wrong for feeling this way, and that I’m the problem for wanting games to take longer. These things and the fact that I’ve rarely won anything with Deathwatch in 9th are making me think of not using them anymore and either focusing on other armies (I have an army of Necrons and I’m thinking of expanding my small army of Grey Knights) or running them as a regular Space Marine army. But then I feel like people would view me as a crybaby for not wanting to play a good army because they took away some of my weapons. So I feel really unsure about what to do or if I’m making a big deal out of nothing.

Then there’s what happens when I do play. I’ve been collecting for years, but I only got back to playing regularly last year. Yet despite how hard I try I keep losing. I’ve run countless 40k games with my Deathwatch army and I only won one game, and that was against a new player running Knights. I’ve also been doing a kill team league and out of the six games I’ve played, I only won one. I know winning isn’t everything, but I hate how I never seem to win. It always feels like I make mistakes during the game, I’m hit with terrible luck, or the opponent is just better than me (whether it be through experience, having a better army, or both). It never feels good when I lose, which has led to me getting stuck in a loop. Go to Warhammer, lose, go home feeling bad, repeat. I’ve heard that you should cut out things in your life that don’t make you happy, and I’m starting to think I shouldn’t continue playing if I just go home feeling awful every time I do.

I’m at a standpoint on what I should do. There are so many models I want to get and build, but if I stop playing the game then it would be a waste of money. I know it could help me make friends, but it feels like my potential friends only see my worst sides. I’m making this post because I need some advice on what I should do. Should I give up the game entirely? Should I try any of the ideas I listed? Or are there other options I hadn’t thought of?

 

[Misery]

but if I stop playing the game then it would be a waste of money

Sunk-cost fallacy: "the phenomenon whereby a person is reluctant to abandon a strategy or course of action because they have invested heavily in it, even when it is clear that abandonment would be more beneficial."

Here's the thing about this: Warhammer is partly designed to get you into EXACTLY that mindset. Iv'e said this before about the game, but it's not truly designed as a game or a hobby. It's designed as a function for the executives behind the company. Which might sound negative and nasty, but it's also realistic (and I'll tell you the exact same thing about the video game industry and stuff I'm into, too).

How many hours have you gotten out of Warhammer? It sounds like a TON of hours. Even if you spent like $4000 on the hobby... you've probably gotten your money's worth. And, you have cool models you can hold onto.

The sunk-cost fallacy just means that you'll continue to spend money PAST THE POINT OF HAVING FUN.

If this hobby aint bringing you any enjoyment... and indeed it sounds like it's just bringing you stress... it may seriously be time to move on.

Here's the thing about that though: If there's a lot of elements of this hobby that you like (yet the stress overrides it) maybe it's time to look into something that has some similarities, but is also different. How about tabletop RPGs or board games, perhaps? Both of those have a lot of elements from Warhammer, BUT, the individual games in them arent designed to suck your finances out your nose (however, the hobby AS A WHOLE absolutely will do that if you should ever give into the whole "buy the new hotness the moment it comes out" thing, so dont do that).

Like, here, have a look at this guy:

That's a model from a board game I'm into (Dark Souls). Yeah it's unpainted... I'm not a model painter, though I may learn it eventually... but models like this are bloody common in board games. Heck, if you want to see just how deep that rabbit hole can go, look up a game called Kingdom Death Monster. Though that one goes a bit too far, even for me.

On top of that, games like this can have a very different experience for you as a player, VS what Warhammer is. Board gamers are less likely to be like, ultra-hardcore GOTTA MINMAX sorts. There are exceptions of course, but you're not going to find people poring over spreadsheets (usually) and trying to math their way to PERFECT PROBABILITIES and stuff like that (which is what Warhammer wants you to do). On top of that, they arent even always competitive. Dark Souls for instance is you + friends working TOGETHER against enemies that are automated by the game rules (such as Gravelord Nito in the photo there).

Also, on the note of making friends, this hobby is seriously a GREAT way to do that. Particularly since people into this hobby are usually very open to trying new things, and not JUST sticking to A: just one game, or B: just one mode in an individual game.

I mean this all as a very serious suggestion, by the way. When you're having trouble with something in a hobby, where it's just nothing but downsides in an overall sense, but there are still plenty of elements within it that are good, it can be a great idea to look elsewhere for something that has some of those elements, yet offers a very difference experience as a total.


Also, seriously: sunk-cost fallacy. Try to keep it in mind, always. One way or another, the money you spent is already gone. You spent it, and got the results of it. What matters now is what you do moving forward.

 

[Lisa1970]

Ya Boi! Good to meet a fellow Aspie 40ker. Me and my 2 sons play, thanks to a friend of mine, who's been playing, like you, for decades. An example of what we field.... I'm just starting on the Raven Wing because as you say, army lists have been destroyed with the 10th edition. Previously I concentrated on the Ultramarines and Skitarii. Alex and Rowan have decided to go forward with Chaos, hence the Demon Prince, Mortarion to follow and Necrons (I love the Necron models), previously Alex went with the Dark Angels. I move in and out of it. It can be all-consuming, especially when you start a new army, as you know. My sons (they're 31 and 22) are great guys, they're used to me and my Aspie's so you won't feel uncomfortable if you ever want to chatter away to them, they agree with what you're saying!