-
Feeling isolated? You're not alone.
Join 20,000+ people who understand exactly how your day went. Whether you're newly diagnosed, self-identified, or supporting someone you love – this is a space where you don't have to explain yourself.
Join the Conversation → It's free, anonymous, and supportive.
As a member, you'll get:
- A community that actually gets it – no judgment, no explanations needed
- Private forums for sensitive topics (hidden from search engines)
- Real-time chat with others who share your experiences
- Your own blog to document your journey
You've found your people. Create your free account
If you have autism how does it affect you?
- Thread starter Amelia
- Start date
- Status
Ok
` have a time delay in understanding social situations- it can take months or decades for me to have a "Ha" moment in decoding what went on in a social situation.
` have been told I have very little tact.
` stare... have trained myself to modulate eye contact appropriately
` rarely smile.
` montone "retarded" voice
` illegible handwriting
` am increasingly satisfied with solitude, and have reframed a "need" for relationships as merely a "want".
` have 0 (zero) friends, and telephone family approx every 2-3 weeks.
` can eat the same meals for years at a time with no variation of menu.
` love routine.
` Uncoordinated, inflexible, slow,
` recently walked 60 km in a day (seemed like a good idea at the time!)- alone
` once cycled 5300 km across the continent (solo, no support)
` can not tolerate clubs (loud music)
` in the past was loyal to friends.
` can go days without speaking- did a 10 day vipassana retreat- Aspie bliss!
` walk in almost any weather - the fewer people out the better!
` admire ducks, hate magpies (esp Mr Mastoid)
hope this helps Amelia (what a mellifluous name!)
` have a time delay in understanding social situations- it can take months or decades for me to have a "Ha" moment in decoding what went on in a social situation.
` have been told I have very little tact.
` stare... have trained myself to modulate eye contact appropriately
` rarely smile.
` montone "retarded" voice
` illegible handwriting
` am increasingly satisfied with solitude, and have reframed a "need" for relationships as merely a "want".
` have 0 (zero) friends, and telephone family approx every 2-3 weeks.
` can eat the same meals for years at a time with no variation of menu.
` love routine.
` Uncoordinated, inflexible, slow,
` recently walked 60 km in a day (seemed like a good idea at the time!)- alone
` once cycled 5300 km across the continent (solo, no support)
` can not tolerate clubs (loud music)
` in the past was loyal to friends.
` can go days without speaking- did a 10 day vipassana retreat- Aspie bliss!
` walk in almost any weather - the fewer people out the better!
` admire ducks, hate magpies (esp Mr Mastoid)
hope this helps Amelia (what a mellifluous name!)
My version of the spectrum ride gave me both good and bad traits.
The bad include meltdowns that are rare,an autistic gut,sensitivity to hissing noises,seeing a lack of perfection in objects,the 1,000 mile stare the inability to read emotions properly,a distrust of others and a hatred for stupidity.
The goods far outweigh the bad.
Over the top intelligence,extreme focus,hyper-analitical views,the ability to do repetitive tasks like a machine,the ability to see and correct processes that are flawed,big picture thinking,the ability to teach myself most anything I want to learn,the ability to teach others what I have learned already,autistic radar,tuning out stupidity and an extreme visual based memory (the supposed non-existent photographic type) that has some pretty awesome abilities in itself.
I got a left frontal lobe traumatic brain injury coming up on four years now and feel that my autism has something to do with my remarkable recovery from it.
Lyme's disease for one year now that was over-shadowed by my TBI issues.
(I shook my fist at the sky after being told of getting bit by a silly little deer tick and yelled out aloud is that all ya got?)
The bad include meltdowns that are rare,an autistic gut,sensitivity to hissing noises,seeing a lack of perfection in objects,the 1,000 mile stare the inability to read emotions properly,a distrust of others and a hatred for stupidity.
The goods far outweigh the bad.
Over the top intelligence,extreme focus,hyper-analitical views,the ability to do repetitive tasks like a machine,the ability to see and correct processes that are flawed,big picture thinking,the ability to teach myself most anything I want to learn,the ability to teach others what I have learned already,autistic radar,tuning out stupidity and an extreme visual based memory (the supposed non-existent photographic type) that has some pretty awesome abilities in itself.
I got a left frontal lobe traumatic brain injury coming up on four years now and feel that my autism has something to do with my remarkable recovery from it.
Lyme's disease for one year now that was over-shadowed by my TBI issues.
(I shook my fist at the sky after being told of getting bit by a silly little deer tick and yelled out aloud is that all ya got?)
The main thing for me is probably the inability to work with other people and/or pre-dictated schedules. I tend to work on my own pace and if possible alone... oh and I abhor routine (though that's probably one of the least aspie things about me). That all by itself was enough reason for me to not finish any education... and thus that's probably my main problem. No education means I can't be picky with a job, but the reasons why my education failed are also a few of those elementary issues that come with being employed 9 out of 10 times. Add in the pretty common inability to change from my own plans and thus being somewhat rigid to work with.. don't get me wrong, I like change, just not change imposed by others.
I guess there's also that I tend to live in my own world a bit, have little to no empathy and a few other things, but I don't see them as problem as such, though they tend to be problems when other people are involved in my life.
The social situations thing for me is odd. I'm not that out of touch with these situations, but a few things come to mind why this is. 1. I tend to be more in control over social situations. If I can't be in control, chances are I won't even participate in said situation and just walk out. (that's probably why group therapy will never work with me, lol). 2. The people I communicate with quite often aren't social butterflies either, hence communication most of the time is pretty short and clear.
I guess I also fall in that category of "I know how to be somewhat social, I just don't have any desire to". That might oppose the more common notion of people on the spectrum who aren't social because they lack some social skills.
I guess there's also that I tend to live in my own world a bit, have little to no empathy and a few other things, but I don't see them as problem as such, though they tend to be problems when other people are involved in my life.
The social situations thing for me is odd. I'm not that out of touch with these situations, but a few things come to mind why this is. 1. I tend to be more in control over social situations. If I can't be in control, chances are I won't even participate in said situation and just walk out. (that's probably why group therapy will never work with me, lol). 2. The people I communicate with quite often aren't social butterflies either, hence communication most of the time is pretty short and clear.
I guess I also fall in that category of "I know how to be somewhat social, I just don't have any desire to". That might oppose the more common notion of people on the spectrum who aren't social because they lack some social skills.
Mattymatt
Imperfectly Perfect
Positives: I'm intelligent and at my last test my I.Q. measured 124. I'm a compassionate and understanding person who is prone to give other people the benefit of the doubt, sometimes to my own detriment. My long term memory is incredibly sharp, especially for things that I've heard or touched. I tend to excel at things I really and truly put my mind to.
Negatives: I have great difficulty holding on to a job. I don't seem to have problems getting interviewed or hired but I usually work my way into a resignation in one way or another. I have a problem with maintaining flowing conversation. I also have trouble with administrative functions like keeping a budget and managing money, paying bills, etc. The list goes on but I'd rather not dwell too much on it.
Negatives: I have great difficulty holding on to a job. I don't seem to have problems getting interviewed or hired but I usually work my way into a resignation in one way or another. I have a problem with maintaining flowing conversation. I also have trouble with administrative functions like keeping a budget and managing money, paying bills, etc. The list goes on but I'd rather not dwell too much on it.
Last edited:
toothless
this is mr shadow,my support cat
mine;
#non verbalism [in the traditional autistic sense,not mutism] mixed with entirely echolalic limited speech,use two fire fox addons to help with understanding language and using different words so am not making posts full of the same words.
#total disconnection to humans,seeing them as objects all of the same worth.
#am unable to visualy process things very well;everything is shapes of lines and colours that merge together to form a blurry part of the background, but anything am interested in gets visualy processed.
#very high support needs-have got two support staff to self,and a sleep in staff and waking staff at night time.
#a acute reliance on routine and predictibility,and any slight changes cause severe challenging behavior.
#severe challenging behavior and extreme autistic anxiety both of which am highly medicated for.
#incontinence,reliant on NHS/prescription nappies.
#will collapse to the floor around noise and head bang the floor and hit out,if support staff try to change a routine such as the shopping list will throw things and kick off because of the extreme frustration and extreme anxiety it causes,because of this and the need for staff to get self out of the building quickly am a wheelchair user in the community.
#am unable to cope with furniture being moved around in a room if its been in a certain place a while.
#am constantly rocking whether sitting or standing.
#am unable to cope with water so have always used baby wipes for washing and only started swimming at age thirty thanks to sensory integration therapy whilst detained at a intelectual disability secure hospital,have to use a wet suit to swim because of the feeling of water on skin,am so good at it now though that was accepted by a special olympicsGB team to compete for them despite being unable to use legs at the same time as moving arms.
#have got a profound connection to animals and like to interact with them whether theyre an insect or a pigeon or a cat etc, when used to go one riding therapy school was put on the most unstable horse there-a thoroughbred called heather who was an ex race horse,under anyone else she was bombing it around the arena but under self she was calm and connected,she got sold and miss her greatly still,woud never miss a human.
#non verbalism [in the traditional autistic sense,not mutism] mixed with entirely echolalic limited speech,use two fire fox addons to help with understanding language and using different words so am not making posts full of the same words.
#total disconnection to humans,seeing them as objects all of the same worth.
#am unable to visualy process things very well;everything is shapes of lines and colours that merge together to form a blurry part of the background, but anything am interested in gets visualy processed.
#very high support needs-have got two support staff to self,and a sleep in staff and waking staff at night time.
#a acute reliance on routine and predictibility,and any slight changes cause severe challenging behavior.
#severe challenging behavior and extreme autistic anxiety both of which am highly medicated for.
#incontinence,reliant on NHS/prescription nappies.
#will collapse to the floor around noise and head bang the floor and hit out,if support staff try to change a routine such as the shopping list will throw things and kick off because of the extreme frustration and extreme anxiety it causes,because of this and the need for staff to get self out of the building quickly am a wheelchair user in the community.
#am unable to cope with furniture being moved around in a room if its been in a certain place a while.
#am constantly rocking whether sitting or standing.
#am unable to cope with water so have always used baby wipes for washing and only started swimming at age thirty thanks to sensory integration therapy whilst detained at a intelectual disability secure hospital,have to use a wet suit to swim because of the feeling of water on skin,am so good at it now though that was accepted by a special olympicsGB team to compete for them despite being unable to use legs at the same time as moving arms.
#have got a profound connection to animals and like to interact with them whether theyre an insect or a pigeon or a cat etc, when used to go one riding therapy school was put on the most unstable horse there-a thoroughbred called heather who was an ex race horse,under anyone else she was bombing it around the arena but under self she was calm and connected,she got sold and miss her greatly still,woud never miss a human.
It slows me down. At least my SPD slows me down, and I don't know whether my autism is cause or effect (or neither) of that. Autism being quite unspecific and defined as "a set of symptoms" by people who should have sufficient education to know that symptoms are not "the problem", but only signs of it.
Kari Suttle
Well-Known Member
I'm only self-diagnosed, but my family all agree that it makes sense and that it fits me to a 'T'. I've noticed i'm hypersensitive to sound, and have had lots of people say things that back me up on that. Some positive points to possibly having AS are:
- I can focus, i think the term is hyperfocus, really well for long periods of time. This is how i cope with being a cashier at a really busy grocery store, actually.
- Going back to hearing things, this can be a negative point too but i have really good hearing. Hypersensitive to sound, have been for as far back as i can remember.
Negative points are more obvious and i can think of them easier.
- I have horrible social skills. I can't tell when its appropriate to join in a conversation or if i'm even wanted to, so rather than embarrass myself i just stay out of it. Being a girl raised with no knowledge of possibly having AS, I had no help in acquiring better social skills either - my mom just told me time and time again to just talk to other kids and see what they like, but obviously its not that easy. I always knew that despite my best efforts, i obviously wasn't getting something cause other kids never seemed to genuinely like me.
- Having horrible social skills means i also have next to no skills in flirting or anything in the realm of dating. I've never dated and don't see myself dating in the near future. Normal people are too confusing, let alone boys. At a time in my life when everyone else is living with their boyfriends or new husbands and having their first kids, I'm boyfriendless, childless, and living with my parents working full time and going to school still.
- Working at a grocery store has made me notice how awkwardly i move my body in space, as well as how anal i am about where things go. The printer has to be in its exact spot, same for the hand scanner, and preferably the computer scanner has to be cleaned, before i will start checking out the customers.
- I either hyperfocus or notice everything but absorb nothing. It is for this reason, as well as the fact i can't judge distance very well or judge how much pressure i'm putting on the pedal, that i don't drive either. I nearly sideswiped parked cars, for gods sake, just cause i couldn't tell how far my car's side was to *parked* cars. I couldn't even park on the curb properly 90% of the time. I don't know if this is AS related but i can't think of what else could cause it.
The Penguin
Chilly Willy The Penguin
It can affect me from getting a job and issues trying to get people to listen to me when I need help. I also have language based learning disability.
Sass
Well-Known Member
I think, now that I've processed my diagnosis and everything that it touches in my past and the present, I'm kind of hesitant to make lists of the properties I have that could be attributed to Autism. I'm Autistic, but I'm also a person, and I have a hard enough time with other people 'othering' me that doing it to myself seems like a silly idea.
I have traits that are awesome, and some that suck, they're me, and I can't put them on a list of things caused by autism or whatever, because then I'm going to feel like I don't have a hand in my own fate, when I feel that I do. It's not the same for everyone though, I know that.
But that's just me, not trying to be rude or anything, that's just how I see it
I have traits that are awesome, and some that suck, they're me, and I can't put them on a list of things caused by autism or whatever, because then I'm going to feel like I don't have a hand in my own fate, when I feel that I do. It's not the same for everyone though, I know that.
But that's just me, not trying to be rude or anything, that's just how I see it
Sass
Well-Known Member
I'm sorry, I just wanted to share my perspective, in a positive way, I didn't mean to offend.
karla
Well-Known Member
Good things and bad things together.
-I am very sensitive to noises and sunlight
-I have very good memory.
-I tend to think everyone is good, maybe deep down, an that often leads to abuse.
-I hate changes
-I like routine
-I´m compassionate
-I have problems keeping a romantic relationship.
-I like being alone
-I need to have a strong intrest, otherwise I feel depressed.
-I can be very obsessive with things and people
-Most of the time I don´t get when people is being abusive or mean to me.
-I tend to be isolated.
-I just can´t keep a conversation if the topic doesn´t intrest me.
-I enjoy collecting things
-I´m a very good self learner. I do it much better than, for example, a class room.
-I don´t like working with other people.
-I feel I have a conection with animals.
-I am very sensitive to noises and sunlight
-I have very good memory.
-I tend to think everyone is good, maybe deep down, an that often leads to abuse.
-I hate changes
-I like routine
-I´m compassionate
-I have problems keeping a romantic relationship.
-I like being alone
-I need to have a strong intrest, otherwise I feel depressed.
-I can be very obsessive with things and people
-Most of the time I don´t get when people is being abusive or mean to me.
-I tend to be isolated.
-I just can´t keep a conversation if the topic doesn´t intrest me.
-I enjoy collecting things
-I´m a very good self learner. I do it much better than, for example, a class room.
-I don´t like working with other people.
-I feel I have a conection with animals.
AsIstAga
Well-Known Member
I honestly couldn't find one thing on your list that didn't make complete sense to me! Well said..
I won't try to list everything, but the ones that I feel affect me more directly are the following:
- Difficulty multi-tasking; I can generally focus all my energy and attention on to 1-2 interests, and everything else is forgotten, until one of those interests has been set aside. Some interests last weeks; some years. This can lead to burn outs, which aren't too fun, but I am not too phased about them, as I thrive on the fact that I have something to occupy myself with.
- I used to have a really hard time "reading" people, and situations. I still do occasionally, but have dedicated the good part of the last decade educating myself. Previously used to be quite guilable, and passive, but have since learned how to "re-program" my mind. Now fairly blunt, and at times a little brazen (though always with good intentions). I have also learned to read people better than most others now, and have even spotted those with ill-intentions early on (I'm not always right, but when I am, it makes my day).
- I have an understanding of how pleasing, or ignoring, my senses can be the difference between happiness, and frustration. I have a deep understanding of what triggers can set my mood, and use these to my advantage.
- I get lost in thought, and this can sometimes be a bad thing (especially when I stay too long in the shower). I've had to set routines, so that when my mind clocks out, my body will still work on auto-pilot, and follow certain steps, which include snapping back to reality by the end of it. This ensures I don't waste too much time, or hot water. I've also been caught out watching TV for hours, but not actually paying attention to what is on screen (a guise for getting lost in thought I suppose).
- I can be alone for long periods of time, and actually enjoy staying home; though I do enjoy the company of those who are important to me, and try to get myself to leave the house as often as I can (even if only to go grocery shopping). While I used to suffer much anxiety from strangers and crowds, I seem to have long outgrown this, and am developing in to something of a social Aspie (though still very much a recluse in the eyes of most people). I think it helps that one of current obsessions is my need to better understand people.
I do believe I may have other contributing factors, aside from AS, though all are self-proclaimed and investigated at this stage.
- Difficulty multi-tasking; I can generally focus all my energy and attention on to 1-2 interests, and everything else is forgotten, until one of those interests has been set aside. Some interests last weeks; some years. This can lead to burn outs, which aren't too fun, but I am not too phased about them, as I thrive on the fact that I have something to occupy myself with.
- I used to have a really hard time "reading" people, and situations. I still do occasionally, but have dedicated the good part of the last decade educating myself. Previously used to be quite guilable, and passive, but have since learned how to "re-program" my mind. Now fairly blunt, and at times a little brazen (though always with good intentions). I have also learned to read people better than most others now, and have even spotted those with ill-intentions early on (I'm not always right, but when I am, it makes my day).
- I have an understanding of how pleasing, or ignoring, my senses can be the difference between happiness, and frustration. I have a deep understanding of what triggers can set my mood, and use these to my advantage.
- I get lost in thought, and this can sometimes be a bad thing (especially when I stay too long in the shower). I've had to set routines, so that when my mind clocks out, my body will still work on auto-pilot, and follow certain steps, which include snapping back to reality by the end of it. This ensures I don't waste too much time, or hot water. I've also been caught out watching TV for hours, but not actually paying attention to what is on screen (a guise for getting lost in thought I suppose).
- I can be alone for long periods of time, and actually enjoy staying home; though I do enjoy the company of those who are important to me, and try to get myself to leave the house as often as I can (even if only to go grocery shopping). While I used to suffer much anxiety from strangers and crowds, I seem to have long outgrown this, and am developing in to something of a social Aspie (though still very much a recluse in the eyes of most people). I think it helps that one of current obsessions is my need to better understand people.
I do believe I may have other contributing factors, aside from AS, though all are self-proclaimed and investigated at this stage.
I do not know if I "have" autism, but I am extremely and severely not NT. I am certainly one of the lowest functioning people on this forum environmentally, but certainly one of the highest internally.
I label myself "brain in a jar syndrome". Officially I am diagnosed on the autistic spectrum, but those who diagnose me seem to have no understanding of me at all.
1. I cannot socialize with a stranger because we have nothing in common, and I am extremely shy. But I would have no problem with someone who already knows me (only two of them left, my mother and brother).
2. My core defect is with interface with the environment. Social problems are secondary to that. I educated myself to a very high degree in the library, but cannot do well in a school. I can be a very good, warm, caring, affectionate friend, as long as that person does not demand that I interface with the environment, e.g. I cannot have a job, or drive a car, or go to school, or socialize with strangers, etc, etc. I can never live independently.
3. I never wanted to play games, or do playground swings, slides, etc. I panicked if anyone tried to pick me up.
4. I am extremely intelligent conceptually, but I have a poor short-term and working memory. My interests are theoretical; I have no interest in practical things.
5. My psychological make-up has not changed since childhood. I can remember infancy easier than I can remember the past week.
6. Not only do I find environmental interface painful for myself, I am not interested in it for anyone else either. One result of that is I have no interest in the conflicts and struggles which is the plot of every story I have ever heard of. At the age of four I was horrified to see people at work.
7. I have powerful empathy; I feel their pain more than they do. I could not hit someone even in play.
8.I am extremely sensitive to who I am with, especially their face. To be with some people would be truly unbearable to me, and to be with others would be the highest pleasure possible for me.
9. I am also profoundly different from NTs in most other ways too. For example, sex, in the post-pubescent sense, in totally lacking in me, both in perception and in action. Another example is that I find infants extremely repulsive, not cute at all.
I label myself "brain in a jar syndrome". Officially I am diagnosed on the autistic spectrum, but those who diagnose me seem to have no understanding of me at all.
1. I cannot socialize with a stranger because we have nothing in common, and I am extremely shy. But I would have no problem with someone who already knows me (only two of them left, my mother and brother).
2. My core defect is with interface with the environment. Social problems are secondary to that. I educated myself to a very high degree in the library, but cannot do well in a school. I can be a very good, warm, caring, affectionate friend, as long as that person does not demand that I interface with the environment, e.g. I cannot have a job, or drive a car, or go to school, or socialize with strangers, etc, etc. I can never live independently.
3. I never wanted to play games, or do playground swings, slides, etc. I panicked if anyone tried to pick me up.
4. I am extremely intelligent conceptually, but I have a poor short-term and working memory. My interests are theoretical; I have no interest in practical things.
5. My psychological make-up has not changed since childhood. I can remember infancy easier than I can remember the past week.
6. Not only do I find environmental interface painful for myself, I am not interested in it for anyone else either. One result of that is I have no interest in the conflicts and struggles which is the plot of every story I have ever heard of. At the age of four I was horrified to see people at work.
7. I have powerful empathy; I feel their pain more than they do. I could not hit someone even in play.
8.I am extremely sensitive to who I am with, especially their face. To be with some people would be truly unbearable to me, and to be with others would be the highest pleasure possible for me.
9. I am also profoundly different from NTs in most other ways too. For example, sex, in the post-pubescent sense, in totally lacking in me, both in perception and in action. Another example is that I find infants extremely repulsive, not cute at all.
- Status
New Threads
-
-
Please delete my account
- Started by JohnDoeWondering
- Replies: 1
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-