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I was seen as gifted as a child...

Discussion in 'General Autism Discussion' started by Skeletor, Sep 16, 2020.

  1. Skeletor

    Skeletor Well-Known Member

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    And now I'm a quirky nobody as an adult. I've found this to be the situation of many aspies, and I have a hypothesis as to why. People with Aspergers, and I am one, are usually mentally older than our chronological age, but emotionally younger. As children, our childish tendencies are seen as normal because we are in fact children. But we can also work college level math problems or quote Shakespeare, and are seen as gifted (I memorized a long poem for a fifth grade English class and recited it letter perfect for example). As we age, these things don't change. We still have our mental abilities, but emotionally we remain younger than our chronological age, some of us much younger, hence meltdowns, continued childish mannerisms, etc. We are no longer seen as gifted children, but as adults who didn't grow up emotionally.
     
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  2. SDRSpark

    SDRSpark Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    I was literally just thinking about (and researching) this. I was also "gifted" as a child (and I suspect my IQ was the only thing standing between me and an autism diagnosis). The issue with "giftedness" (at least in the 90s when I was "identified") was that it came with intellectual supports (special classes etc.) and no real support or even acknowledgment of struggles (social, sensory, etc.). The other issue with it is that it came with a bunch of sky high expectations which I either couldn't meet, or didn't have any interest in.

    I've often wondered if "gifted" was often code for "high functioning autism" before HFA was a thing...especially in girls, because I see a lot of former "gifted kids" expressing similar sentiments and struggles.
     
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  3. Skeletor

    Skeletor Well-Known Member

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    Totally agreed sdr.
     
  4. GrownupGirl

    GrownupGirl Tempermental Artist

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    When I was a kid adults often said I was really talented and an artist. Now I have no idea what they think. Or if they think at all.
     
  5. Progster

    Progster Gone sideways to the sun V.I.P Member

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    I wasn't. At one point in school, I was described by my class teacher as "a moody and rather erratic child who doesn't see the importance of tidiness." They wanted to put me in a slow learners' class, but my parents objected, insisting that I was intelligent and I should stay in the same class. I was very good at some things, but poor at others. I struggled with maths and the interpretation of literature - poetry and algebra were my nemesis. And yet, I had a good memory and could learn foreign languages with ease, or recall facts and other information without much studying.
     
  6. menander

    menander Well-Known Member

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    Good gracious that hurt. Like a cosmic joke. Someone reaching in and taking what made us special and now we are not even average. We're weird. I need a hug (but can't have one---touch)
     
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  7. Gift2humanity

    Gift2humanity Well-Known Member

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    I was seen as gifted by my mum as I taught myself to read and write before school but gave it up as I wanted my Dad's acceptance and for him not to call me baby. Unbeknown to me, he was infantilising me. He was the sort who could literally not bear to see success and joy in others.
    This is called asynchronous development.
    You are not a nobody, Asperger's is a blessing. A wise old Indian chief say they have a license to be a shaman.
    My intelligence seeped away as Dad called me weirdo as he was very mainstream conformist, and I wanted to be the same.
    There is still time for you, follow your bliss as Joseph Campbell the great mythologist quoted, you could be a writer, a creative, many aspies are.
     
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  8. Giraffes

    Giraffes Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    I very much relate, i have 'child like' tendancies and a sence of fun not generally reflected by those i meet, aside from N/D individuals.
     
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  9. Fino

    Fino Alex V.I.P Member

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    Yep!
     
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  10. Moonhart44

    Moonhart44 Well-Known Member

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    i was in the gifted program, and moved to another district and they put me back in. kids would bully me because i wasnt smart like them. today i have been thinking about how smart i am, and how i can't communicate it in a real world setting
     
  11. VictorR

    VictorR Random Member

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    '90s gifted kid as well, and the one year I got sent to a program at another school, I totally loved it - we were allowed to do whatever we wanted. I ended up doing a paper and poster presentation about minerals.

    High school was a total disaster. If being quirky wasn't bad enough, being captain of your school's chess team is a really effective way to knock your social ranking to zero. LOL.
     
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