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I realize that how my family and how other 12 steppers think of me is irrelevant.

I do not need to stay in this frame of mind for much longer. I need to figure out how to drop it all and how to not pick it all back up.
 
It's so important to write it out SO YOU CAN release it. You will not feed into the lies, the gaslighting, the pure BS. Your mom did not have your back, except in a very sick way. To walk away is difficult BUT it is your only freedom to breakaway from your frigging dysfunctional mom. And those that followed and fed into it like your frigging dysfunctional aunt. Then you must release it and find forgiveness otherwise you feed the dysfunctional family dynamics. Let it go. Release balloons, release duckies in the river, do whatever to let this no longer stop you from morphing into the successful being you are supposed to be. So you get late to the party. That's okay too. You finally crossed over. I waited so long to see you finally get through that door. This is great to finally see you on my side. I crossed thru the door like you, where my reality wasn't quite right until l saw that there was hype and BS.
 
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