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How to not explode?

Billthecat

Well-Known Member
V.I.P Member
Are you a kind of "extreme closure" or a "take a long run away from me" person?

Better having a rude awakening or been left in a fake dream?

It looks like a nonsense, but it's what still left of my mind after a long time of writing and delete to respect the forum.

Take it as it is.
 
If I never really have to wake up from my fake dream and the dream is a good one, let me dream. If waking up is inevitable then it will probably be rude, regardless of what happens. So, unless there's some critical need for it, let me dream until I stop naturally. Dreams are necessary for sanity.

Sometimes people deliver rude awakenings because they enjoy raining on other people's parades.
 
Rude awakening for me. I like to know where I stand. I don't want to be lied to or deceived to protect my feelings. I found out recently that someone had done this to me, and it made me extremely angry.

"When someone comes to eat me alive, I like to see their teeth" - New Model Army.
 
I think in black and white and can't seem to get the whole 'grey area' thing. I don't know where other people stand and have difficulty figuring it out, so I'd rather not deal with people when I don't have to.
 
The passive-avoidance techniques work well for people in your life that, really, when it comes down to it, you don't care about. They can come and go, even if they make you angry for whatever reason, it doesn't matter because they are meaningless to you.

Then, there are the people in your life that, for better or worse, what they say and do does matter. In these cases, you are kind of forced to interact. If you are still using your passive-avoidance techniques with these people, there may be consequences for not engaging in a meaningful, clarifying way. These are the people you need to ask those clarifying questions, "poke" them for more information, gain some insight into their context and perspective. It's only then that you will have some sense of where you stand with them, and understand the situation you both are in.

Furthermore, to address the "grey area" situations that @Storm Hess mentioned, these situations require some understandings of "pros and cons", situational awareness, perspective taking, and context. Most situations are never "black" and "white", it's almost always a "Yes/No, but " scenario because there is more information that needs to be considered. You see this play out in courtroom dramas, the lawyer trying to force the witness on the stand to answer a "yes" or "no" question, and the witness is confused, frustrated, and struggling because the question is not a "yes" or "no" question. Another example, comedian Bill Burr recently described the topic of abortion quite concisely, paraphrasing, "I am all for a person's rights and freedom over their own body. The government should not dictate what you can or cannot do with your own body. On the other hand, you're killing a baby." "See!, This is where it gets weird for me!" Regardless of your personal stance on a topic, whatever it may be, you have to understand both sides of the argument in order to make informed decisions. In this case, who am I to go into a voting booth, as a man, and potentially vote against a woman's right over her own body? I don't know her situation. Who am I to judge? It's not my place. Even though .that may mean ending the life of a fetus? It tears at your soul. Keep in mind MY personal situation, I've dedicated my life to saving the lives of tiny babies. My parents have lost a child in infancy, it scars the soul, it never gets better, there's a lot of trauma associated with that. Yet, knowing that, knowing what I do for a living, it is not my place. See! Grey area.

**I do not want to trigger a discussion about the controversies over abortion. I simply used the example as a talking point. I am not going to engage in this, so before you post, let it go.** ;)
 

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