How do you present yourself, how do you handle colleagues and does your employer help you?

[Jibbers]

I am not working right now but when I have worked I've enjoyed it and had respect from my workmates and bosses.

Good to hear your working experiences are (quite) positive!

 

[Jibbers]

Thank you for the additional background. First I want to point out that you were hired as a fill-in and the employer had little incentive to accommodate (beyond what is required by law, but that can always be fudged). They also had little incentive to give you more humane scheduling. The fact that they extended that to their "regular" employees reflects a longer-term investment in those people - not merely that those folks were "better" than you.

In short this deck was stacked against you from the start. I hope you don't worry too much about not being able to "improve" as they asked you to.

The only disability accommodation I ever sought was a shortened work week, which was granted in two jobs. I never did this until I passed a six-month probation period. I did everything through the employer's Human Resources department, not directly through my boss; and with the aid of a doctor, I asserted a medical condition requiring a shorter week, without ever stating the diagnosis. I had already demonstrated my ability to perform on the job and to contribute, although it's also true that I had certain frictions with other employees.

I would recommend you avoid "temp" or "floater" jobs that are almost by definition, expendable. Also, find out discreetly what you need to do to request accommodations, and don't give too much detail. Be a really top performer in a "permanent" position before requesting them.

I did think of self-employment for you before I read you had considered it. I would think you could provide nutrition counseling directly to clients who are willing to pay for access and service. You could either meet them at their home, or rent a small office space. You can also do a lot of the work by phone or online. Does the law where you are, allow that kind of activity, or must you always be supervised in a clinic setting? Even if it's the latter, you can usually work an angle that isn't considered; instead of being a self-employed dietitian, you might market yourself as a Diet Mentor or Lifestyle Coach. You might seek clients through a gym rather than a hospital.

If you CAN'T work more than 3 days a week, then DON'T work more than 3 days a week. But if you can't make ends meet like that, you'll need to decide if you are too disabled to work. One option might be to start your business on a shoestring budget, and work at something low stress like file clerk, shelf stocking, order picker, or whatever you can do that is not as people-intensive. To make your business succeed, you need to learn a lot about marketing. I did start a secretarial service and although I had to work quite hard, it was satisfying and I had a certain amount of independence; I did that for five years. Long story why I got out of that, which I won't go into here.

Thank you for your response! I can start a business without supervision in the Netherlands. I have studied to do so, reading in to marketing surely is a good idea if I'd start my own company. A lot of jobs in the Netherlands are based on 0-hour contracts and a lot of uncertainty even the ones when you have degree. There are jobs with a more stable amount of hours but those are the jobs most dietitians are looking for. I will look in to starting my own company and what I need to do and risk to make that happen, as well I will look for vacancies in my work-field. I have studied for it and I want to do it, because it is one of my passions=)

 

[Jibbers]

I work full-time in an industrial shop, sorting recycling for our city contract... The typical work week is Monday to Friday daytime, 40 to 50 hours per work...

I have been there for 10 years now, and survived... My job itself does not excite me... Most employees don't socialize outside of work, at least that I'm aware of... I already have networks of people anyway... And I'm that person who is mostly rather quiet on breaks, keeping to myself, usually doing some reading... Basically like someone else said I work because I have to to survive and I'm self-diagnosed Asperger's, so it would take some work to get gov't disability, and I don't think I would want to because gov't disability doesn't pay much anyway

While my job itself does not excite me, energize me... I dive actively into my photography hobby when I'm not working... That's what keeps me going!

Thanks for sharing! I'm rather quiet myself on lunch breaks and like to do something like reading as well. =) Photography is awesome! Good luck and I hope you'll have to 'survive' a little less some day.

 

[Ken]

I voted, "Yes, I work fulltime but I have trouble doing so".

The truth is, I am now retired, but I did work fulltime and did have some difficulties, yet great accomplishments – a great career.

I think I was very lucky. It seemed like my boss knew I was autistic even before I did, although autism was never mentioned. It turns out that my autism was a tremendous benefit to me and my career. I did very poor in school and certainly could not handle college, but I have an obsessive passion for electronic circuit design. My education was self-taught after school in nice quiet libraries. There, I got to learn anything I wanted. That education got me technician jobs. Eventually I got hired as a technician to build prototypes for a contract electronics design firm that designed electronics for military, aerospace, medical and commercial industries. My workspace was in a quiet room all by myself. It was heaven. I would often suggest improvements to the engineers, and on occasion they would try my suggestions. This started becoming more and more routine. Then the engineers started to come ask me electronic theory and design questions. Then I was given a project of my own. The engineers, my boss and our customers were really impressed with my novel, innovative designs. Then I was promoted to Senior Electronics Design Engineer – the only electronics engineer without a college degree. I owe all that to my Autism! So, my advice is to exploit your autism as an advantage. Point out to any potential employer that your autism is an asset because it instills a passion for your work that is not common in neurotypical people. That you will go the extra mile because you are internally driven by your autism to do so. I think that is an asset to any business.

 

[GadAbout]

I voted, "Yes, I work fulltime but I have trouble doing so".

The truth is, I am now retired, but I did work fulltime and did have some difficulties, yet great accomplishments – a great career.

I think I was very lucky. It seemed like my boss knew I was autistic even before I did, although autism was never mentioned. It turns out that my autism was a tremendous benefit to me and my career. I did very poor in school and certainly could not handle college, but I have an obsessive passion for electronic circuit design. My education was self-taught after school in nice quiet libraries. There, I got to learn anything I wanted. That education got me technician jobs. Eventually I got hired as a technician to build prototypes for a contract electronics design firm that designed electronics for military, aerospace, medical and commercial industries. My workspace was in a quiet room all by myself. It was heaven. I would often suggest improvements to the engineers, and on occasion they would try my suggestions. This started becoming more and more routine. Then the engineers started to come ask me electronic theory and design questions. Then I was given a project of my own. The engineers, my boss and our customers were really impressed with my novel, innovative designs. Then I was promoted to Senior Electronics Design Engineer – the only electronics engineer without a college degree. I owe all that to my Autism! So, my advice is to exploit your autism as an advantage. Point out to any potential employer that your autism is an asset because it instills a passion for your work that is not common in neurotypical people. That you will go the extra mile because you are internally driven by your autism to do so. I think that is an asset to any business.

Wonderful post and wonderful story. Two observations: 1. Be a self-directed learner - which is easy for autistic people, it's just a matter of following a special interest. 2. Get a skill that is needed, and make yourself indispensable.

 

[Suzanne]

I bet you have tried really hard and have given it your all. I hope you'll find something that works for you in te future in whatever form that might be. Something that gives you joy and energy. I'm rooting for you!

The problem is with me, is that I tend to find out things a bit late. So, whilst I was in my own country, I had no idea what I really wanted to do and so, worked odd jobs in my late teens and now, that I am in another country, with a different language, I have discovered talents that could have been of great financial gain if I had discovered them earlier.

I see a social worker and she has informed me, that due to my situation, my husband and I are entitled to fully comprensive health care free, which is such a relief.

Currently, there is no chance of working in the country I am in.

 

[luna88]

Jibbers,

Thank you for posting and sharing! Wow. I have many of the same questions as you. I honestly can't offer much advice for you since I'm grappling with many of the same problems right now but I thought I'd share my story since it is quite similar

I also am on the path to becoming a nutritionist. Nutrition has been a passion/hobby for about the past 10 years (aka special interest lol) and I've healed my own body in many ways with food. In fact my health has totally transformed because of plant based anti-inflammatory foods. So I always thought I was destined to become a nutritionist. I passed the GRE's, drove across the country and started graduate school then after almost 2 years with 17 credits left to finish I had to drop out due to health issues and the brutal social atmosphere which wore me down. While I've always been a good student I was super worried about starting a career in a very social field- so unlike you I didn't even make it to the job of nutritionist but I still envision myself going back to finish the degree (online next time) and having private clients on the side someday by starting my own business, working independently. I experienced an autistic crash (aka burnout) in grad. school and I'm still coming out of it (chronic fatigue, irritable mood, lower tolerance for stress, loss of social skills, increased sensitivities ect...). So while I prioritize resting now and working with a somatic therapist, I started a degree in communications with hopes of getting into digital health communications as my full time career- with the goal of working virtually because I've read how that's really the way to go when you are on the spectrum because there's less social interaction and you won't feel so pressured to interact and perform socially- then there's the plus of being able to control your environment and reduce the sensory overload. So that's how I hope to resolve this problem!

In relation to your situation with your work colleagues I struggled to collaborate with my colleagues in grad. school because my social anxiety became so severe- and I was condemned for this because there were misunderstandings and one girl even started spreading rumors about me. People were angry when I didn't speak. At the time I didn't get it but in hindsight I can see how they might have thought I was being condescending or judgmental or ignoring them. I understand what you mean about needing a "safe bubble". My therapist at the time advised me not to worry about it and to do my own thing if I didn't feel like socializing but in every class I felt so pressured to participate and talk to people- but it was such a struggle. I didn't realize how hard this would be for me until I was in grad. school because I must've managed to avoid it throughout my entire life. Like you I find group communication quite challenging- but at the same time I can be very good at masking. Processing everyone's comments is like solving a math equation, it's dizzying. I was also very intimidated by how aggressive the girls in my program were. Everyone was so mean I was actually terrified to go to class and eventually stopped going.

So anyways while I'm disappointed I didn't become a nutritionist this year, I've learned a lot about myself from this entire situation: I need to set clear boundaries to protect myself from aggressive people and I need to work virtually. I'm still wondering the best way to share my autism diagnosis with a future employer to request accommodations and how to deal with aggressive colleagues- if I find out anything I will let you know. I went to a public lecture recently where Temple Grandin spoke (the most famous adult with autism- she has many books + a movie) and she advised focusing on your strengths - but it sounds like you already know about that! She also shared a key tip that helped her lands jobs: selling her work (like bringing in a portfolio to an interview) rather than herself.

Anyways, I'd love to stay in touch with you about this because it's on my mind all the time. I'm here for you!