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hi! I'm Adrian

Adrian is an alias, but unlike my name, my autism isn't fake. I'm waiting until I'm older to get fully diagnosed because my parents respond with hostility to the idea but it's ok. I have made a list of every symptom I can find and checked and checked and checked but I can't be 100% sure because I'm not a doctor at all. I also have been properly diagnosed with Adhd as well as general and social anxiety. I have been masking since first grade and am teaching myself to unmask because I am halfway through losing understanding of who I am :) Be as mean as you want to me, I'm a queer and autistic teen in a small town, I've heard worse, and it was accompanied by rocks aimed at my head.
 
Hello and welcome. Glad that you found us. Better to spend your time understanding yourself than losing yourself, right? I saw you mention that you like to talk about a creek, rocks, owls, and animal bones. Sounds fascinating to me. I hope we hear about some of that stuff here.
 
Hello and welcome. Glad that you found us. Better to spend your time understanding yourself than losing yourself, right? I saw you mention that you like to talk about a creek, rocks, owls, and animal bones. Sounds fascinating to me. I hope we hear about some of that stuff here.
I look forward to sharing, and I agree : ) Thank you for being so welcoming.
 
I'm also diagnosed with ADHD, along with anxiety and depression. Self-diagnosed with Autism, as reading about it and ADHD felt like reading my autobiography. Long NHS waiting list for an assessment in UK. Over 4 years in my region.

So I will eventually pay to have a private assessment, and I lost my place on the NHS waiting list due to them losing my original assessment, which I checked on progress of my wait 1.5 years after having been referred by my GP. They resent me the questionnaire and it was a Dr's copy, clearly not meant to be seen by a patient. They said to complete it anyway. Then the place which does the actual assessments called me, told be about the waiting list and sent me yet another questionnaire. At which point my gut just said the timing isn't right. Yes, I could fill out the paperwork, yes I could endure the awkwardness of asking my parents to do their bit. Yet I didn't want to be waiting that long and I felt deflated by the whole referal experience.

My parents seem uncertain at best about Neurodiversity. Not that I don't think they believe it exists. More that me and my brother aren't autistic. My brother is textbook autistic, whereas I bottle and mask a lot of what he does in public. My mother said that my brother has quirks, but that's as far as she'll go. There seems to be some shame attached to it. A boy in my class at school was very similar to my brother in behaviour. He was diagnosed, and my mother has referred to him several times in quite a scathing tone - as in, of course Robert is Autistic, but me and my brother couldn't possibly be. Truth is both my parents are clearly on the spectrum too, but she's in her early 70's and my dad is 13 years older. The likelihood of diagnosis or understanding of the spectrum from that era, and at their current age is small.

I literally ticked every box in the 1 to 1 interview and questions for ADHD in my private assessment, and still my mum dismissed it entirely. I did actually stand my ground in one conversation with her about it. She said her spirit guides told her that I don't have ADHD and that spirit doesn't lie. I said quite firmly, I know what you believe, but I do have ADHD.

Anyway, long story short - there's a lot of patterns and similarities I've seen in being on this forum for 2 years. Many of us will share or relate with similar tales of our own experiences, struggles and worries.

I recommend looking up Gabor Maté on Youtube. Also he has published many books. He has ADHD and is a medical doctor, author, speaker and philosopher for our times. Truly inspiring and very helpful.

All the best, and enjoy your time here. It's a very welcoming and interesting place to be a member of.

Ed
 
I'm also diagnosed with ADHD, along with anxiety and depression. Self-diagnosed with Autism, as reading about it and ADHD felt like reading my autobiography. Long NHS waiting list for an assessment in UK. Over 4 years in my region.

So I will eventually pay to have a private assessment, and I lost my place on the NHS waiting list due to them losing my original assessment, which I checked on progress of my wait 1.5 years after having been referred by my GP. They resent me the questionnaire and it was a Dr's copy, clearly not meant to be seen by a patient. They said to complete it anyway. Then the place which does the actual assessments called me, told be about the waiting list and sent me yet another questionnaire. At which point my gut just said the timing isn't right. Yes, I could fill out the paperwork, yes I could endure the awkwardness of asking my parents to do their bit. Yet I didn't want to be waiting that long and I felt deflated by the whole referal experience.

My parents seem uncertain at best about Neurodiversity. Not that I don't think they believe it exists. More that me and my brother aren't autistic. My brother is textbook autistic, whereas I bottle and mask a lot of what he does in public. My mother said that my brother has quirks, but that's as far as she'll go. There seems to be some shame attached to it. A boy in my class at school was very similar to my brother in behaviour. He was diagnosed, and my mother has referred to him several times in quite a scathing tone - as in, of course Robert is Autistic, but me and my brother couldn't possibly be. Truth is both my parents are clearly on the spectrum too, but she's in her early 70's and my dad is 13 years older.

I literally ticked every box in the 1 to 1 interview and questions for ADHD in my private assessment, and still my mum dismissed it entirely. I did actually stand my ground in one conversation with her about it. She said her spirit guides told her that I don't have ADHD and that spirit doesn't lie. I said quite firmly, I know what you believe, but I do have ADHD.

Anyway, long story short - there's a lot of patterns and similarities I've seen in being on this forum for 2 years. Many of us will share or relate with similar tales of our own experiences, struggles and worries.

I recommend looking up Gabor Maté on Youtube. Also he has published many books. He has ADHD and is a medical doctor, author, speaker and philosopher for our times. Truly inspiring and very helpful.

All the best, and enjoy your time here. It's a very welcoming and interesting place to be a member of.

Ed
I'm happy to have such a warm welcome, and thank you for the recommendation, I'll definitely check him out!
 
welcome to af.png
 
Welcome, Adrian! :)

I’m also a queer person living in a small town who has dealt with discrimination, as well as kids throwing rocks at me when I was growing up, actually. I don’t think this is as rare of an occurrence for people like us as some people might think, unfortunately :/
I’m sorry you’ve had this experience too.

Anyone who is diagnosed with autism, or is awaiting diagnosis or suspects that they are autistic is welcome here. You will definitely learn a lot from this community!

There are people with a wide range of interests, experiences and cultures here and I hope you will stick around and enjoy it. Let us know if you need any advice or help!
 
Welcome! I'm sorry to hear about your living situation and what you've been through. You are definitely welcome here. Many other queer people also others with Adhd and Anxiety disorders.

I hope you are able to enjoy your time here. Please let us know if you need anything!
 
Adrian is an alias, but unlike my name, my autism isn't fake. I'm waiting until I'm older to get fully diagnosed because my parents respond with hostility to the idea but it's ok. I have made a list of every symptom I can find and checked and checked and checked but I can't be 100% sure because I'm not a doctor at all. I also have been properly diagnosed with Adhd as well as general and social anxiety. I have been masking since first grade and am teaching myself to unmask because I am halfway through losing understanding of who I am :) Be as mean as you want to me, I'm a queer and autistic teen in a small town, I've heard worse, and it was accompanied by rocks aimed at my head.
First of all, welcome. :)

I see you're 14 and dealing with all of this. You've come to the right place, I believe.

You mentioned waiting until you're older to get fully diagnosed. If you are in the US, my advice would be to obtain a diagnosis and get things sorted out before your 18th birthday, as most insurance coverage for mental health will often terminate at that time. Then, it becomes expensive, sometimes prohibitively expensive. As a "pediatric patient", you will often qualify for other support, if you need it, as well. I am assuming you have seen a psychologist for your ADHD and anxiety condition, so I would revisit and talk about doing some autism testing. If your psychologist is thinking in that direction, they could have a conversation with your parents. Sometimes news like this coming from another source may be received differently than if you talked to your parents. There are some on-line tests available to take, as well. Although they are not "diagnostic" in and of themselves, these are the same tests that are used as part of a professional testing/screening.
 
I come from a family where a number of us are most likely autistic none diagnosed.

Either way welcome to the community.
 
For what it's worth, I, too, have experienced aerial rocks.

Typical bullies back during highschool, and I'm a total geek, you can see how that adds up. I was a convenient target.

You'll not find anyone flinging any rocks at you here though.

Well, I mean, okay, even if someone wanted to they couldnt, hard to get a rock through the screen, but they'll not be throwing virtual rocks either.

It's a good place.
 
Welcome! I hope that over time things get better for you so you can feel more comfortable as yourself and not be so tired.
 

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