I'm a bit confused here, because on the one hand, you say that you feel you are not autistic enough and feel like a fake, but on the other hand you are struggling and should be able to cope better.
Firstly, you have a diagnosis for a reason: because you have struggles and need support. If you didn't have these issues, then you would not need or receive this diagnosis. All people with high functioning autism have these issues or similar; some can mask it and appear 'normal' and hold down a long term job, relationship, have a social life and friends, etc, but we can only do so much and there is always an often hidden cost or trade-off, we are much more prone to anxiety, depression and burn-out than our neurotypical counterparts, will reach the tipping point a lot faster and take longer to recover. 'High-functioning' autism in adults is often about the way we feel inside and our coping strategies, the parts we manage to keep hidden from others around us. The new student with his father who I saw a couple of days ago saw a friendly, cheerful language tutor with assessment questions and materials, he did not see the anxiety and feelings of being out of my depth and comfort zone that meeting and talking to strangers inevitably brings, the mask of concentration I need to monitor my body language and find the right and appropiate things to say. He didn't see the stimming under the desk I need to do to keep everything under control and to avoid overstimulation, or the recovery I need after the interview. I can relate to the feeling of being a fake, but I've come to realise it's about how I feel inside, how much I can manage and the need to balance that with the demands of living.
Secondly, forget Instagram. Like all social media, it's a fake reality as nobody every strives to present themselves in the best light and nobody every talks about the problems they may have, and lets face it, nobody's life is perfect and everybody has problems.
