-
Feeling isolated? You're not alone.
Join 20,000+ people who understand exactly how your day went. Whether you're newly diagnosed, self-identified, or supporting someone you love – this is a space where you don't have to explain yourself.
Join the Conversation → It's free, anonymous, and supportive.
As a member, you'll get:
- A community that actually gets it – no judgment, no explanations needed
- Private forums for sensitive topics (hidden from search engines)
- Real-time chat with others who share your experiences
- Your own blog to document your journey
You've found your people. Create your free account
Feeling embarrassed about asking for financial aid
- Thread starter Suzanne
- Start date
It isn't ever easy.
When my brother drove his car into our family house last year in a suicide attempt we were told our home insurance wasn't going to cover us. We had to rely on the goodness of friends and family for physical and financial aid.
The actual barrier of going around doing it could be through a website like Just Giving or Virgin Money Giving but that's not what you asked. But it's one why of just getting over the embarrassment of asking people on mass, I suppose, for help.
Don't be put off by the idea that there are people in more dire situations that you who are in greater need of aid either. People are more willing to help out closer friends and family that strangers, that's just how the world works. Be honest with people. The response from people is really quite humbling, it's not that you learn who your true friends are from these experiences but you do realise just how much these people love and care for you.
What I did was make videos of what went on and explained the situation. Gave it a personal touch rather than hide behind a wall of text.
Hope that helps. If not, ask anyway anything that comes to mind.
When my brother drove his car into our family house last year in a suicide attempt we were told our home insurance wasn't going to cover us. We had to rely on the goodness of friends and family for physical and financial aid.
The actual barrier of going around doing it could be through a website like Just Giving or Virgin Money Giving but that's not what you asked. But it's one why of just getting over the embarrassment of asking people on mass, I suppose, for help.
Don't be put off by the idea that there are people in more dire situations that you who are in greater need of aid either. People are more willing to help out closer friends and family that strangers, that's just how the world works. Be honest with people. The response from people is really quite humbling, it's not that you learn who your true friends are from these experiences but you do realise just how much these people love and care for you.
What I did was make videos of what went on and explained the situation. Gave it a personal touch rather than hide behind a wall of text.
Hope that helps. If not, ask anyway anything that comes to mind.
What!! How absolutely terrible.
For this, I can't reply, you'd need to see what they procedure is in France where you live.
You are entitled to the aid and shouldn't feel bad about asking. If you could, you would work, but as it is, you can't, there is a good reason why you can't and this is not your fault, so no reason to feel guilty. You could see that aid as a temporary measure, until you are in a position to look for work or find a job suitable for you, something that you need to do to live.
Pandemonium is the word that comes to mind. Fortunately we all survived that dark day. And the damage could be a lot worse that what is was. It's in moments like that though you realise how strong you can actually be.
RosaViolet
Well-Known Member
Hi Suzanne, I am sorry you feel that way. Good wishes to you.
I am new and don't know your circumstances, do you live in France?
I lived in France for a time, I don't know specifics about their disability benefit system, but generally, the culture is that people pay taxes, so they can access benefits when they need, its citizen's right to ask for financial help, it's their money coming back to them. They don't have any particular shame attached to it, so maybe you don't need to worry about that?
On the specifics, in France they would have the disability allowances, you just need to find the organisations that could advise and explain it. General principle is one understand the system, how it works, and then one work it, make it work for your circumstances.
I do that work for my children in another country, it's a lot of brain twisting and admin, but it works at the end. So don't despair, get some support
I am new and don't know your circumstances, do you live in France?
I lived in France for a time, I don't know specifics about their disability benefit system, but generally, the culture is that people pay taxes, so they can access benefits when they need, its citizen's right to ask for financial help, it's their money coming back to them. They don't have any particular shame attached to it, so maybe you don't need to worry about that?
On the specifics, in France they would have the disability allowances, you just need to find the organisations that could advise and explain it. General principle is one understand the system, how it works, and then one work it, make it work for your circumstances.
I do that work for my children in another country, it's a lot of brain twisting and admin, but it works at the end. So don't despair, get some support
your husband I presume is paying taxes !if so you are entitled to help !to be honest applying for help depends on how proud you are !if you are very proud it will hurt a lot !if you are not very proud it won't !eventually all it comes down to is filling out another form !waiting for the money to go into your account!definitely tell the psychiatrist as it will help the government decide what level of disability you have a neuro typical like the psychiatrist speak their language!
I can understand how you feel having lived in a foreign country for two years without claiming off their benefit system. I was sure that people would be able to find out if I did, as I did consider moving there permanently, but this thought would have stopped me I think unless I was able to survive otherwise. It's up to you.
I have seen my therapist and had organised what I wanted to say and translated it and we went from there.
I see a social worker next wednesday and a dosier will be put together for me, to see what kind of work I can do and suited to my needs. My therapist assured me there was nothing to feel anxious about and all they want from me is to work with them.
It would be so lovely if I was given a chance to work as a fiancial adviser or psychologist ( but that is just dreaming).
My husband says to me, to let them see I cannot work and they will make the decision to give me financial aid, because I will have shown that I am not just trying to get money for nothing.
I feel a lot easier about it now.
I see a social worker next wednesday and a dosier will be put together for me, to see what kind of work I can do and suited to my needs. My therapist assured me there was nothing to feel anxious about and all they want from me is to work with them.
It would be so lovely if I was given a chance to work as a fiancial adviser or psychologist ( but that is just dreaming).
My husband says to me, to let them see I cannot work and they will make the decision to give me financial aid, because I will have shown that I am not just trying to get money for nothing.
I feel a lot easier about it now.
RosaViolet
Well-Known Member
That's good to hear. I an pleased that you feel better now.
Really, you don't need to worry about attitudes to asking for help in France. It is totally mainstream and perceived as a human right and an entitlement of a free citizen. Pride doesn't come into it at all, if only that a proud citizen would apply and use the state for their needs.
Do try to understand how the system work, what 'test' you need to pass. By test I mean the conditions, requirement you need to meet to qualify. As your husband was saying you need to show certain things so they would tick the right boxes. But I don't know whether it would be necessarily to say you can't work at all. Try to google translate the web information about this benefit system maybe, look into the machinery of this application process.
Good luck
Really, you don't need to worry about attitudes to asking for help in France. It is totally mainstream and perceived as a human right and an entitlement of a free citizen. Pride doesn't come into it at all, if only that a proud citizen would apply and use the state for their needs.
Do try to understand how the system work, what 'test' you need to pass. By test I mean the conditions, requirement you need to meet to qualify. As your husband was saying you need to show certain things so they would tick the right boxes. But I don't know whether it would be necessarily to say you can't work at all. Try to google translate the web information about this benefit system maybe, look into the machinery of this application process.
Good luck
A fair and difficult question to answer in general. Inevitably Involving:
1) Being able to successfully navigate through a particular government bureaucracy.
2) Being able to convincingly communicate your plight to skeptical and indifferent bureaucrats. Often made worse by policy at the highest levels who are tightening their nation's purse-strings.
1) Being able to successfully navigate through a particular government bureaucracy.
2) Being able to convincingly communicate your plight to skeptical and indifferent bureaucrats. Often made worse by policy at the highest levels who are tightening their nation's purse-strings.
New Threads
-
-
My story in mini videos also, the reason I'm doing this again- Started by Jenisautistic
- Replies: 0
-
-
-
-
Reimagined Gotham City Thought Experiment- Started by FayetheADHDsquirrel
- Replies: 4
-
-
-
-