Falling inlove while in a relationship?

[Dorkasour]

I'm not currently in a relationship but out of curiosity has anyone here every fallen for someone while you were already in a relationship? How did you handle this conflict?

 

[Crossbreed]

Not exactly, but I have had strong feelings for someone else while being married.

Those feelings dissipated whenever she left my presence.* I have since learned that that can be caused by favorable human pheromones. I just avoid those kind of people or, at least, avoid being alone with them.

*She showed no signs of actively trying to seduce me, either.

 

[SunnyDay16]

Nope but I probably would either try to find distractions or end the relationship if it really was starting to affect it.

 

[Suzanne]

Yes, sadly and the only thing that I found to work, was distancing myself and the longer that occurs, the easier it gets.

This is not an excuse; it is a reason. But I was raised by a peodophile father and it was only recently, I realised what my issue is with chaps. If they are single and show an interest in me, then subconciously, I am saying: I am doing my job well. And if he is just polite; I feel distressed. So, having realised this, I believe it will help me so much in not thinking that way now.

 

[pax]

Nope.

 

[Theta.G]

I'm not currently in a relationship but out of curiosity has anyone here every fallen for someone while you were already in a relationship? How did you handle this conflict?

Infatuation yes, love No.

Stop watching shows like twilight. and other love triangle garbage. Then one can change the paradigm and exercise self control.

 

[Starfire]

Infatuation yes, love No.

Stop watching shows like twilight. and other love triangle garbage. Then one can change the paradigm and exercise self control.

You made a very interesting point there! For someone like me who greatly struggles to clearly distinguish between some emotions, how would I really know if it was love or infatuation? I honestly am not sure if I would be able to tell the difference between the two despite consulting a dictionary and understanding the difference between the two, on an intellectual level.

 

[Buzzerfly]

I dont know about relationships or whatever but if you find someone who is loyal to you and wants to get through this life with you around, it's extremely easy not to lust after others.

 

[Lia]

I fell in love with my boyfriend while I was dating my ex. The relationship was already failing and it would have ended no matter what, but falling for someone else made me realize that I had never truly been in love with my ex to begin with, and that it had never really been a good relationship at all. I broke up with them, and it's the best decision I've ever made. I can't even imagine what my life would be like now had I done anything differently.

 

[Theta.G]

You made a very interesting point there! For someone like me who greatly struggles to clearly distinguish between some emotions, how would I really know if it was love or infatuation? I honestly am not sure if I would be able to tell the difference between the two despite consulting a dictionary and understanding the difference between the two, on an intellectual level.

It can be tricky at first you're right. Time is a good test for this. Generally hindsight will reveal. Then from there you can apply what was learned in the future. Ex. If you thought you loved someone. try dating for a few weeks and easily gave up on being with them, moved on. It wasn't love.

There are many different views on love and everyone has their own personal meanings and definitions . opinions in today's world. When presented with "Love at first sight" it's a misunderstanding. People build up an image of who they want in their minds. Then, forget about it. When they encounter someone who resembles that idea which they created and longed for, a connection is made (in the mind) and the brain begins to flood with hormones and chemicals as a cue, before one could even think. "Look, we found what you wanted!" (based solely on the IMAGE created in the mind... Aesthetic.)

One may entertain the idea of being with her or him, flirt, get to know the person. That rush may die off after a short time, it may not. I think love ultimately comes from compatibility. How much can person 1 give to person 2, that which person 2 lacks? and vice versa. How well do they fill each others holes. (didn't mean that sexually)
Where infatuation is more like a fling. More bodily desire than an interest in the person. You don't care as much for them as you do yourself. After a couple of weeks, or even the first hook up you could do without them. No big loss. Move onto the next guy or girl.

 

[Bolletje]

I’ve had crushes while in a previous relationship. I usually dealt with this by ending my relationship, because I considered the crush to be a sign that my relationship wasn’t working. (It wasn’t, but that’s beside the point)

I haven’t had strong feelings for anyone else while in my current relationship. I have had fleeting interest in others, but I don’t panic over it anymore. I just accept those feelings for what they are, and then I let it be. I can’t imagine falling in love with someone else. But being sexually attracted to others, sure.