Do you ever forget who you are?

[stigmatic]

First off, I am diagnosed with Asperger's, ADHD, and OCD. Recently I became very depressed because of my ex and this other girl that I started talking to after her. I was used and cheated on from my ex and the other person used me to get back at my brother. Ever since then I always get these mild form of Anxiety attacks where I have rushing thoughts and all of them are negative, whether its a playback of what my ex said to me or thinking to myself how I'm a terrible person. Then, I usually will bang my head or start burning myself because I feel like it just gets me to stop thinking for a little bit. After they subside I usually feel like a terrible person and even disgusted with myself for how I act around some people. I also just feel so lost and confused about things now. I feel like I can't be myself because its not acceptable to society and I always feel like I'm criticized for being myself. Does anyone else feel like this? I'm not sure exactly if this is the Asperger's or if I have something else on top of it, maybe some form of PTSD, Anxiety, or bipolar? I'm going to see my psychologist tomorrow for the first time in a few years to see what else I have.

 

[The Penguin]

It can be very hard to be accepted. The fact I like model trains, Lego and etc is not something that most adults like. At the same time, I'm not changing who I'm to be into mainstream interest just to get accepted by people. I find it takes up too much of my energy to be into mainstream interest that I don't like and things still never work out for me. Based on this, I decided to be me and accept myself who I'm

Yes I feel lonely, have many depressed days, have no friends, family does not visit me or does not offer any support, but I found things I enjoy doing alone such as camping and hiking. I don't know if there anything you can do alone to enjoy your self.

I'm going to make an educated guess you would like to have company, bf or something in your life but it very hard to get. I'm not going to act like I have all the answers for you because I don't. I can only share how I manage things for my life being in a related state your in.

But I will tell you this, you haven't done anything wrong. It is very hard to be accepted for being different.

 

[stigmatic]

I have friends and family, I just feel like they don't understand how I feel. I also feel like people are terrible, maybe not all of them, but a lot of them are pretty bad. They seem very judgmental or like to use people a lot and I'm thinking, why? How do they get off to using others or being so judgmental that they just dislike someone for their views. Thanks for your response by the way.

 

[StephF]

Lego is cool !

 

[Effy]

Autistics have Bipolar-like episodes... It could be that? Bipolar Disorder is a lot more than going from happy to sad, contrary to how a LOT of people think. It could just be that you need to see a therapist to help you work through your issues.