Do any of you have trouble making friends not online but in everywhere real life?

[Ronald Zeeman]

Even when going to parties, I prefer to hang with the ladies men are into sports, and other stuff I have no interest in.

 

[FayetheADHDsquirrel]

I don't go to parties, but when in public I mostly speak with other women because when I speak to a man very much people seem to think I'm interested in him or something. I don't run into many people from either gender though that I have very much in common with. If I act stiff, they either accuse me of being a snob, baby talk me or say I'm a cyborg. If I relax and be myself they either accuse me of being a snob, baby talk me, or say that I am crazy, creepy, ect. When I had the job at the place that helps people with conditions, I felt like I was accepted by almost all the clients regardless of which gender they were.

 

[Ronald Zeeman]

My Wife being NT likes to socialize, being a extravert by nature so do I. Went to visit friend last week his impression after not seeing him for months, he sent message to my wife Ron unwound like a watch where the spring come lose.
My masking is like acting like an introvert.

 

[Ronald Zeeman]

Faye
You probably noticed me mentioning in my family the most common surname was MInderhoud yet none in my tree,
obviously they or at least the ladies got married and had families. Bright good looking female Aspie, bad combination The other ladies see you as competition. The target rich environment for you is where the brighter men hang out. An Aspie guy will notice you quickly My sisters husband is an Aspie like her, they really connect. Took him years to warm up to me, watching me chat with his wife. Think he was self conscious hanging with us his dad treated him like he was dumb, through he is an engineer. My dad really liked him, wondered how he could treat his son like that, My buddy fellow Aspie from college, meet his wife when i took him to my high school graduation, We got invited to classmates house for a small after party. He hooked up with her she was quiet NT kept to herself. They started dating.

 

[Coxhere]

For me, the verb, "make" is a stumbling block. "Make" sounds like a lot of work to me. This thread makes me think of a meditation journal entry that I wrote some time ago. "Are we human doings or are we human beings?" Rather than "making friends," to me it seems easier and more comfortable "becoming friends." Making is harder than becoming. . . .

 

[DeFunkCat]

After some persistent work I have some friends. One of my rabbit holes is music. So i’ve found some friends there. Have some sort of online friends. Communication online I find difficult, I need quality feedback. Online doesn’t provide this for me. So online increases my anxiety.

 

[Shevek]

It is easy to make a friend if you forget about yourself and be the person someone is looking for. It can be better than nothing, but potential benefits are shaky.

 

[velociraptor]

I found an efficient way to make new friends by accident. I participate in events or activities that are of interest to me with like-minded people. I have found that they are accepting of my quirks and I come away with new friends and have maintained good and meaningful recently created friendships for a couple of years since realizing this. Our shared interests seem to trump my weirdness.

Conversely, when I set out with the goal of making friends, I flop. Badly. The failure is usually so epic that if there were any more egg on my face, Denny's would serve me as an omelette.

My 2 cents, before inflation.

 

[Ronald Zeeman]

The only event of mutual interest I every had was working, we all liked industrial painting and some of us liked colour control. I do not see these people any more now that I am retired.

 

[Coxhere]

I found an efficient way to make new friends by accident. I participate in events or activities that are of interest to me with like-minded people. I have found that they are accepting of my quirks and I come away with new friends and have maintained good and meaningful recently created friendships for a couple of years since realizing this. Our shared interests seem to trump my weirdness.

Conversely, when I set out with the goal of making friends, I flop. Badly. The failure is usually so epic that if there were any more egg on my face, Denny's would serve me as an omelette.

My 2 cents, before inflation.

velociraptor, have you ever thought that it is your "weirdness" that makes you the beautiful human being who is you? The rest of us know this fact, for certain.