Corrupt A Wish

[AsperDragon]

Granted, but society refuses to deal with you and comes after you with pitchforks.

Why do you think i have a hard time dealing with society? Xd

Granted....the temperature rises by one degree....only.....

I wish i was as funny the last person to post.

 

[Hedgehog Instigator]

Granted it will now be 120 degrees all winter.

I wish I could get some peace and quiet

 

[Naturalist]

Granted, but you have lost your hearing.

I wish I could remember what I was supposed to do at work today...

 

[OrSomething]

Granted, but you have to write a 15 page single-spaced essay on the link between Burmese architecture and Colombian wildlife.

I wish I had a million dollars.

 

[AsperDragon]

Granted, you have a million dollars. .of a local drug lords money. And he knows you have it. And so does the DEA.

I wish i could grant you all your wishes.

 

[Butterfly88]

Granted, but you can only grant wishes for one hour.

I wish my family had more money.

 

[Hedgehog Instigator]

Granted but after receiving the money they disown you.

I wish my bird was more social.

 

[Butterfly88]

Granted, but he/she becomes so social he/she never leaves you alone.

I wish I had a vacation condo.

 

[Ste11aeres]

Granted, but you don't have any vacation time.

I wish I could afford a haircut.

 

[OrSomething]

Granted, but your haircut ends up looking like this:


I wish my jeans didn't have a hole in them.

 

[tree]

WISH GRANTED:
Your new jeans are two dimensional.

I wish that Tubby the Tuba was a real person.

 

[OrSomething]

Granted, but he falls in love with you and follows you around serenading you with horrible screeching noises all day long, even when you're trying to sleep.

I wish for world peace.

 

[Ste11aeres]

Granted, but you're now living on Mars.

I wish for more counter space in my kitchen.

 

[tree]

WISH GRANTED:
The oven has been removed for
your new state of the art abacus.

I wish that Platyhelminthes was
the third most sought after Christmas
gift this year.

 

[Flinty]

Granted. Half the people want Tickle Me Elmoes, half the people save one want Tickle Me Elmoes (Turbo Edition), leaving one person wanting Platyhelminthes, but still putting it number three on the list.

I wish I knew what a Platyhelminthes was.

 

[OrSomething]

Granted. You know what they are because your house is infested with them.

I wish I could think of something to wish for.

 

[Reedstorm17]

You think of something to wish for, but it's so complex you can't possibly fit it in one post and it's so long that no one has the patience to read it and this thread goesto oblivion.

I wish it wasn't eleven at night and time for me to go to bed.

 

[Butterfly88]

Granted, but you fall asleep anyway.

I wish I had a real life friend.

 

[Reedstorm17]

You have a real-life friend, and then another, until you so many friends you don't know what to do with all of them or how to keep track of them.

I wish I had enough courage to start a thread.

 

[Butterfly88]

Granted, but no one replies. (By the way I'd try to answer your thread if you posted)

I wish turkeys were not mistreated and made into Thanksgiving dinners.