• Welcome to Autism Forums, a friendly forum to discuss Aspergers Syndrome, Autism, High Functioning Autism and related conditions.

    Your voice is missing! You will need to register to get access to the following site features:
    • Reply to discussions and create your own threads.
    • Our modern chat room. No add-ons or extensions required, just login and start chatting!
    • Private Member only forums for more serious discussions that you may wish to not have guests or search engines access to.
    • Your very own blog. Write about anything you like on your own individual blog.

    We hope to see you as a part of our community soon! Please also check us out @ https://www.twitter.com/aspiescentral

Becoming undone

Markness

Markness

Young God
V.I.P Member
I flunked my first college course exam, I am being made to work weekends after not having to do so for a long time, giving dating apps another shot ended up only being history repeating itself, I can’t sleep without taking pills, and I tend to just lie around until I can’t avoid going to work.
 
This sounds tough, I expect you are feeling tired and low. Do you have any support at all? It's good that you are posting here about this.

I remember finding relationships hard to navigate as a younger person, yes think I tried dating agencies around that time, didn't meet anyone I wanted to see more than a couple of times, and in retrospect I don't think it was a great way for me to meet people, as I found talking to new people and socialising so difficult. I found meeting people through shared interests or classes better, as there was already a shared focus.

What's the issue with sleeping, is there noise or is it tension and stress more? Hope this improves soon. I just get up and read or google stuff etc if I cant sleep, but this causes tiredness sometimes, so not ideal for work. Do you have a counsellor or any help?
 
Thinx said:
This sounds tough, I expect you are feeling tired and low. Do you have any support at all? It's good that you are posting here about this.

I remember finding relationships hard to navigate as a younger person, yes think I tried dating agencies around that time, didn't meet anyone I wanted to see more than a couple of times, and in retrospect I don't think it was a great way for me to meet people, as I found talking to new people and socialising so difficult. I found meeting people through shared interests or classes better, as there was already a shared focus.

What's the issue with sleeping, is there noise or is it tension and stress more? Hope this improves soon. I just get up and read or google stuff etc if I cant sleep, but this causes tiredness sometimes, so not ideal for work. Do you have a counsellor or any help?
Click to expand...

I have a therapist and sometimes my family and the few friends I have help me. However, I only see my therapist once every other week, my family has their own issues, and I don’t get to see my friends very often.

I didn’t have trouble sleeping until I started having to work again when my state started easing up on the lockdowns. I enjoyed being away from the people who abuse me emotionally and the boring work I have to do though I did miss going to restaurants, arcades (still haven’t open back up yet), music shows (same as with arcades), buying comic books (depression has made me struggle holding an interest in them, though), I couldn’t see friends, I was depressed about turning 32 while still being single, and the depression in general got worse.
 
Hi i think you are feeling upset and 'all is to much' ATM I'm 2 weeks into a new job and accept the need to work to 'pay my way' as i live alone whilst knowing the social pressure to 'fit in' and avoid mass anxiety is problematic, as usual i am 'underemployed' and being single again is tricky but please try to find ways to feel better for you, mine are music, reading, exercise and movies, maybe think about what you enjoy and what activities validate who you are, i've done the 'lying around' till i need to work and for me it leads to depression and that may be the same for you, good you posted and in my view action even little things that you enjoy may lead to a little joy and feeling more positive i hope so.
 
My life has been a tab weird, perhaps l deal with it better. Maybe try to be emotionally neutral until you find a niche that seems doable. l have stumbled along because l was unsure of exactly what l was encountering, now l just kick it to the curb. Just stay strict about your downtime, and strict about your boundaries.
 
Giraffes said:
Hi i think you are feeling upset and 'all is to much' ATM I'm 2 weeks into a new job and accept the need to work to 'pay my way' as i live alone whilst knowing the social pressure to 'fit in' and avoid mass anxiety is problematic, as usual i am 'underemployed' and being single again is tricky but please try to find ways to feel better for you, mine are music, reading, exercise and movies, maybe think about what you enjoy and what activities validate who you are, i've done the 'lying around' till i need to work and for me it leads to depression and that may be the same for you, good you posted and in my view action even little things that you enjoy may lead to a little joy and feeling more positive i hope so.
Click to expand...

I definitely feel like life is too much and I am trapped by everything. It’s like I’ve been at a crossroads for so many years but I can’t move like a magic spell has paralyzed me.
 
There's no magic involved getting into or out of a slump.

The human brain is phenomenal.
Mine believes anything I tell it :)

If I was bored with a job, I was able to list about 8 different reasons why I shouldn't turn up for work in approximately five heartbeats.
I believed myself too.

In hindsight; a wonderful thing,
I could have made microscopic changes to my own generalisations.

If I felt underemployed and it was getting me down,
there was nothing stopping me looking for something more suitable.

Looking, counteracted that 'trapped' suffocating feeling. Didn't mean I had to apply,
knowing there was something better out there gave me a lift,

along with going in to see my GP for a review - checking my meds dosage was adequate for the kind of slump I was in,

getting a referral for therapy, if needed,

and on some of my worst days, kicking my own butt out of the door for a 20 minute walk in daylight.
(Some days I hadn't even washed. Just put on some clothes, shoes & go)

The above are the kind of microscopic changes I'm talking about.
Things I could do for myself when I felt like I wasn't keeping it together very well.

You could view a 'crossroads' as an overwhelming, fear inducing burden of decisions,
or three new opportunities to try?

Be kind to yourself :)
 
I was able to cry today after feeling it build up for a long time. I suppose that was being kind to myself?
 
Crying let's you express your feelings, so that sounds like progress, because expressing how you feel helps you then move on from that and feel a bit better, and helps others understand what you are up against. Plus you are speaking about how you feel here, that's good too. I hope you are able to get out and about and get some exercise too, that often helps, and may lift your spirits. I hope today is a little better for you. Progress takes time, but you are getting there.
 
This sounds good. You are getting out and walking, that raises spirits for me and I try to have a good walk most days. French bulldogs are great little dogs, usually nice tempered and bright. How lovely to have a puppy to take care of! Bet it will make you want your own puppy!
 
My mother was really the one who wanted him but she regrets it now because he’s very hyper and demanding of attention. He originally belonged to my sister in-law’s mother who felt she couldn’t take care of him and I told my mother that the lady I get massages from wanted a frenchie puppy but she thought he was going to be a cuddly and calm puppy. She also sort of guilt tripped me.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

New Threads

Top Bottom