Anyone else very clingy?

[Fluttershy]

I feel like Asperger's gets categorized as distant and unemotional a lot, but anyone feel the opposite?
I become totally absorbed in any relationship I'm in. It's probably a bit obsessive but I can't help it. I can't think about much other than that person. I sometimes go over the top with romantic gestures. I always want to cuddle. I always want to be around my person.
Anyone else a hopeless romantic? I feel like we're always stereotyped so void.

 

[metalminx24]

It's not just you [emoji4] Especially as a teenager I was very clingy with boyfriends, partially because I feel emotions very intensely and partially, I think, because I was scared of rejection and being alone forever. I always found dating and the associated mind games really stressful, and threw myself into every relationship in the hope that it would work and I wouldn't have to go through the confusing initial bit again. Of course teenage boys (and teenagers in general) are rarely looking for committed relationships and I always got my heart broken.

I don't appear to be able to occupy the middle ground. It took a great deal of self-restraint not to be 'myself', both in relationships and friendships. Absorbed is definitely the right word Fluttershy, it's unfortunate that others find it off-putting or too much to handle.

I think I would consider myself romantic, but not in the typical flowers/chocolates/teddy bears sense. I'm more likely to do something unexpected, or something small to make the other person's day easier.

 

[Adora]

I'm romantic too fluttershy while I'm usually distant with most people I'm affectionate with my husband and like his cuddles,I have had infatuations with the opposite sex and have had my heart broken in the process,but no fluttershy you are are not the only one who feels that way.

 

[Astroganga]

I've had infatuations/obsessions with various young men and men over the years both that I knew in real life and celebrities. I had a few casual boyfriends when I was younger, all very innocent and often didn't go further than hugging but most of them only lasted a few days as they got freaked out by my clinginess and my odd excited mannerisms when I saw them. I was also really clingy towards my first husband which he did not appreciate and compared me to his parents' dog. After getting burned with that experience (he became abusive physically, emotionally and financially) I have become quite aloof, even with my second husband who I had five kids with. One of the reasons we have had so many problems is because of how I am.

 

[Adora]

I've had infatuations/obsessions with various young men and men over the years both that I knew in real life and celebrities. I had a few casual boyfriends when I was younger, all very innocent and often didn't go further than hugging but most of them only lasted a few days as they got freaked out by my clinginess and my odd excited mannerisms when I saw them. I was also really clingy towards my first husband which he did not appreciate and compared me to his parents' dog. After getting burned with that experience (he became abusive physically, emotionally and financially) I have become quite aloof, even with my second husband who I had five kids with. One of the reasons we have had so many problems is because of how I am.

I'm sorry to hear your first husband treated you that way no one deserves to be abused and it's sad that he hurt you.

 

[Jonathan Lees]

you are not the only one, i am exactly the same.

 

[Astroganga]

I'm sorry to hear your first husband treated you that way no one deserves to be abused and it's sad that he hurt you.

Thanks. I know now what a loser he was, I really idolised him as he was quite a bit older and he and his backward family were really awful to me and wore me down. Then one day something just snapped and after all his threats over the years to divorce me I said 'ok go on then'.

Still I kind of blamed myself until a couple of weeks after I moved out, a friend of mine who used to have a bit of a problem with compulsive lying told me that he had been having an affair for months with a woman who worked in the shop opposite his in the shopping centre. A woman who knew he was married and abandoned her kids to run off with him, my ex had been abandoned by his own mother in similar circumstances and only had appalling things to say about her and similar women. Not only that but he had moved his new girlfriend into our house (rented in his name only at his insistence) the day after I had moved out. She was also much older than him, nothing wrong with that but he had always said men who go for older women are weird. Straight away I phoned him expecting him to say my friend was lying again but he admitted it was all true. Then the veil was really pulled from my eyes. They later had two kids together and he told people he didn't want kids but heard I had kids with my second husband and didn't want people to think us not having kids together was his fault. Feel sorry for his kids only.

 

[LostInSilentHill]

I have never had a romantic relationship but with close friends and family I am told I am clingy. When shopping I have to count 5 steps away from the person I'm with because they said they don't like turning around and having me in their face every time.
This is only with people very close to me, otherwise I don't like any physical contact.

 

[Myrtonos]

I'm sorry to hear your first husband treated you that way no one deserves to be abused and it's sad that he hurt you.

I wonder if any of those men ever went as far as yelling at her about her laugh every time she giggled.

 

[Adora]

I wonder if any of those men ever went as far as yelling at her about her laugh every time she giggled.

I don't know Myrtonos since I don't know what he said to her

 

[Astroganga]

if you're talking about my ex then yes he would find fault with everything including my laugh, how I walked and so on.

 

[wyverary]

I'm aromantic, but I have had some very close, you could even say intense, relationships. It took me a long time to learn how to "let go," keep my distance when necessary, and keep healthy, mutually-agreeable boundaries. So yes, I probably used to be a lot more like you. I still struggle on occasion (I was once diagnosed with BPD...long story).

 

[Judge]

Neither clingy or particularly romantic. Often problematic with Neurotypical relationships in my own case.

 

[Flinty]

I used to be clingy, but now rather the opposite. Most of the time, that is.

 

[Adora]

if you're talking about my ex then yes he would find fault with everything including my laugh, how I walked and so on.

That's horrible he sounds like a bully and he seemed that he was trying to ruin your confidence I have been in similar situations too where I was put down about how I behaved and how I looked or even what I liked.

 

[Rayner]

I'm not particularly clingy. I'm the opposite

 

[Darwin162]

People will always revert to a stereotype in their minds because the brain likes to simplify everything. Others think we are distant because that's what they see or expect but the reality is that mostly we are just scared of being hurt or misunderstood and it can be painful when you think you have found a friend or potential partner and then get rejected due to them not being patient with us. We are mostly very loving and I know for me I want to bwork someone's best friend and find it hard to cope if they don't feel the same. It's like a one way street with a truck coming towards you. You can't go back but in front of you is only pain. This is why apart from my wife my only friends are my 2 dogs. ☺

 

[Astroganga]

That's horrible he sounds like a bully and he seemed that he was trying to ruin your confidence I have been in similar situations too where I was put down about how I behaved and how I looked or even what I liked.

Yes he was. A few months after we divorced he called me at my parents house begging for forgiveness, but he wasn't sincere and it was just another mind game to him. I said 'ok thanks, I'm quite busy now so are you finished?' Not the reaction he hoped for. [emoji1]

 

[espressocookie]

I am quite clingy: hand holding, PDA, sex, and affection

espressocookie

 

[Bro'Freak]

I guess I am & that's because i'm an old romantic at heart.