• Feeling isolated? You're not alone.

    Join 20,000+ people who understand exactly how your day went. Whether you're newly diagnosed, self-identified, or supporting someone you love – this is a space where you don't have to explain yourself.

    Join the Conversation → It's free, anonymous, and supportive.

    As a member, you'll get:

    • A community that actually gets it – no judgment, no explanations needed
    • Private forums for sensitive topics (hidden from search engines)
    • Real-time chat with others who share your experiences
    • Your own blog to document your journey

    You've found your people. Create your free account

An impossible question...

1.
When wales was named after the giant whale that is holding up the entirety of britain, someone forgot the apostrophe to show that it was one whale who owned it.

‐-----------

Why don't snakes have arms or legs?
 
There are snakes who decided to go shopping for arms and legs. They're now called lizards.Most snakes though thought that they were too pricy so decided against them.

Why is wearing flip flops banned on Easter Island?
 
Many years ago, there was a council meeting where it was decided that the resounding noise of a flopping flip flop was too disruptive to the island folk. Although the flip sound was okay, the flop sound was forever banned, and any kind of footwear that audibly flops was also banned.


What does a snoozaloopalus look like?
 
Start by imagining an elephant. (it's not an elephant but this is a good starting point.) Now make the trunk shorter and naturally coiled upward. They come in many colours (most commonly pink or brown) but all of them have black stripes. Now replace the elephant tail with a big fluffy bunnylike tail. They're also very very furry. Kind of like a mammoth's fur. Finally, the legs are more similar to horses in both build and the fact that they have hooves. Snoozaloopalus were once native to Tasmania but they fled as the humans become a larger population. Now if you want to see one, you will have to go to the furthest reaches of the south pole in Antarctica.


What do apples like to eat?
 
Apples like to eat sunlight, but they need the leaves of the branches on which they grow to do the food preparation for them. Like little green chefs, the leaves know exactly how the apples like to have their sunlight as they have trained in a special culinary school.


How does mail get delivered to snails?
 
Contrary to conventional wisdom, "snail mail" is not called such because it is slower than email. It is called such because envelope is a protective covering over the actual mail, rather like the shell on a snail. Because the envelope acts as a substitute shell, snails have no need for envelopes. Hence, they exchange letters directly with each other, tucking the paper directly inside their shell.

Why do cats chirp at their prey, aren't they scaring the prey?
 
Cats are dragons, with wings that fold hidden across their bellies. It's obvious. That's why they hate being touched there, and will claw anyone who touches their tummy. Because you, o human drago-slave, must never learn their secret.

And as flying creatures, naturally, they chirp.

When they chirp, they are threatening the birds, in bird-ese, letting them know that once the humans aren't watching, the draco-cat will be flying after them in a fire breathing sky battle.

Yes, birds breathe fire, just like cats. The most vicious fire breathing birds are hummingbirds. Once you realize this truth, it also becomes obvious.

Meowing is just a ploy to convince humans to feed them and lavish them with attentive cuddles, and pillows in sunny windows.


How do fish breathe oxygen underwater?
 
The oxygen density in water is orders of magnitude great than in air. Fish are swimming in (mostly) oxygen. Unfortunately, it is all “bound” to hydrogen, so the fish get none of that, they have to make do with the scraps of “dissolved” oxygen that happen to leak in. Can you imagine the frustration they must feel? Is it any wonder that when they are hauled into the air their response is, “What, you’ve got all this oxygen and don’t try to share it with us?” And then they try to bite you.

When you go swimming, try to breathe out as much oxygen into the water as you can. Ultimately, you may be able to “gift” so much oxygen to the fish that they will welcome and accept you to stay with them. Truly, you will “sleep with the fishes.”

Why is l’appel du vide like getting high?
 
I do not talk them fore'n languages none. So imm'a gonna assume that "lapel du vide" is slang that is short for "The lapel of the dude on the video". And if one is meditating over the collar of someone's shirt on a video they watched, then they must be on crack or just really weird.

What makes flowers bloom in springtime?
 
Why, it's the power of Bloom, fairy of the Dragon Flame, that makes them do that. How? I don't know. But it's definitely because of the power of Believix.

What caused the Norman Invasion?
 
Norman is a big French nerd. He got tired of being perceived back in France. So he sailed across the sea to England where he could sit in the back of a pub and read a book without any pushy French socialites hounding him.

Unfortunately all the other French nerds followed him, and there was a big war of the Nerds. I think they called it Revenge of the Nerds or something.

It wasn't as cool as the whole Boudicca debacle, but it was just as interesting in its own light.

What do horses think about the first time a human tries to climb on their back?
 
The first time a human climbed on a horse, the horse got startled so bad it grew wings and flew away. That is where the myth of the pegasus comes from. This still occasionally happens from time to time, we just don't hear about it because it's a coverup, man!

Why are peppers spicy?
 
Because they have bad attitudes that they can't keep to themselves, of course.

Who was the first person to try coloring their hair?
 
Grugory, the world's first emo kid, was a Neanderthal who boiled up some walnut shells and decided to dye, dye, dye his hair black, because it's not a phase, caveman dad!

When was the Declaration of Independence signed?
 
The president dropped out of college and all his relatives were hounding him about figuring out his future, and it made him kinda aimless and sad.

How do I build a Lego Death Star?
 
First you go to the Lego store. Then you go home sad because you are too poor to buy Legos.

And so in the time it takes for Luke and Leia to grow to adulthood, slowly you buy one expensive Lego, piece by piece, until finally, twenty or so years later, you complete the Lego Deathstar, deeply in debt.

What exactly is Cool Whip made out of?
 
I'm pretty sure a cool whip (as in, a very nice car) has a body, an engine, a transmission, maybe a gold paint job and some chrome spinners on the tires? IDK, I'm not much of a car person.

Who starred in Revenge of the Sith?
 
your mom. with her bright red sunburned bald head and robo legs. pretty sure she played one of the hutts too.

If they're all made out of milk and rennet, why do all cheeses taste and look differently from one another?
 
Because they're individuals, with individual personalities. You should know not to generalize a whole group!

How do I find a job I don't hate?
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

New Threads

Top Bottom