From a very early age I have a memory of asking birth "mother": you will make sure to keep our new home clean, won't you mum?
She was worse in our new home.
I think I was 7, when at school, watched a video on hygiene. I was mortified to discover that I should be changing my clothes and knickers every day! I just wanted to run and change and it was excrutiating to be around others, wondering if they could smell me?
Not sure how I managed this, since I had no money, but I began to be obsessed with knickers and I changed them every day.
Although we had a washing machine, it was so dirty, and the excuse was it was broken, but now as an adult, I see that it was "mother" being very lazy and making excuses. Anyway, I learned to handwash my clothes, but I got severe screaming at from "father". He hated the fact that I put my clothes up to dry. But I had no idea that I could get a line outside. My brain did not go that far.
I was 16 and was earning and from that, I bought my own dishes and cutlery and hid them. The reason for this, was due to the horrendous kitchen!
Again, a bit feather brained, to think that putting food stuffs in the fridge area that was my special place, was going to stop my siblings and "mother" taking them and thus, many rows would occur.
There was an occasion when I was very young, that the "parents" were ill and in bed for days, so I gathered my siblings and suggested we clean the kitchen and it was no easy task, but in the end it did look great and the floor was even clean.
"Mother" came downstairs and in my eagerness to try and get her to see that she can change, I gently took her by the shoulders and steered her to the kitchen and asked what did she think? All I got was: yeah, it is ok and walked over and made her and her husband a cup of tea and walked away, with spiliages and my brain said: she doesn't care.
There was a petition to remove us from the area, due to how dirty we were.
Strangly, I remember some neighbours telling me that I am different from the family.
I learned when to change bed linen when I got married.
She was worse in our new home.
I think I was 7, when at school, watched a video on hygiene. I was mortified to discover that I should be changing my clothes and knickers every day! I just wanted to run and change and it was excrutiating to be around others, wondering if they could smell me?
Not sure how I managed this, since I had no money, but I began to be obsessed with knickers and I changed them every day.
Although we had a washing machine, it was so dirty, and the excuse was it was broken, but now as an adult, I see that it was "mother" being very lazy and making excuses. Anyway, I learned to handwash my clothes, but I got severe screaming at from "father". He hated the fact that I put my clothes up to dry. But I had no idea that I could get a line outside. My brain did not go that far.
I was 16 and was earning and from that, I bought my own dishes and cutlery and hid them. The reason for this, was due to the horrendous kitchen!
Again, a bit feather brained, to think that putting food stuffs in the fridge area that was my special place, was going to stop my siblings and "mother" taking them and thus, many rows would occur.
There was an occasion when I was very young, that the "parents" were ill and in bed for days, so I gathered my siblings and suggested we clean the kitchen and it was no easy task, but in the end it did look great and the floor was even clean.
"Mother" came downstairs and in my eagerness to try and get her to see that she can change, I gently took her by the shoulders and steered her to the kitchen and asked what did she think? All I got was: yeah, it is ok and walked over and made her and her husband a cup of tea and walked away, with spiliages and my brain said: she doesn't care.
There was a petition to remove us from the area, due to how dirty we were.
Strangly, I remember some neighbours telling me that I am different from the family.
I learned when to change bed linen when I got married.