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UberScout

UberScout

V.I.P Member
Please Don't Be Mad At Me 02/09/1996 30
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  • UberScout
    With this high vibration I've spent three days building up, and this elevated energy of pure manifestation, I align myself with the essence of my most favorite form of art, and bring it forth to my senses!
    UberScout
    KirbyScout: "Owww.... My back... Oh yeah... I don't have a back... Because I'm a ball of fluff. Heh."
    UberScout
    Got Sword Art Online Utilities for my computer so I can do the best anime roleplay therapy recommended by my telehealth therapist to treat my autism ever done. RIINKO STAATO!!
    UberScout
    k i e f c h i e f
    View previous comments…
    UberScout
    UberScout
    (I played Nobunaga's Ambition on the playstation today and was training PSI at the same time and developed a new "thinking filter" where I use that game engine as a visual grabber for thought processing: eg. Instead of bookkeeping in English sentences, my inventory notebooks measure my belongings by categories with numerical ratings
    UberScout
    UberScout
    Also had a little bit o kief coffee as i said to celebrate me learning a new thing on my own LOL, I like to reward myself like that mentally, and my telehealth therapist agrees it gets the dopamine flowing and that's good for the ol ticker as they say!
    UberScout
    UberScout
    Oh freck it I'll just write a thread about it :P I don't wanna gunk up the server with my erroneous comments lol :o)
    UberScout
    I wish God would tell me why he's so angry at me, since he's letting me have so much grief.
    View previous comments…
    Tony Ramirez
    Tony Ramirez
    My friends say God does not curse people because of Jesus.
    UberScout
    UberScout
    I used to have people ask me things like "What would you say to Jesus if he came to your house and visited you?" and I'd tell them the first thing I'd say is "WHAT THE HELL TOOK YOU SO FREAKIN' LONG?!" and "YOU WANNA TELL ME WHY I GOT A BRAIN LIKE A FREAKIN' ALIEN?!?!"
    Metalhead
    Metalhead
    If I had a brain like an Alien, I would hate always being outsmarted by Ripley.
    UberScout
    Oh... The stream was cancelled due to madforeseen dogumstances. Sorry guys. Maybe next time.
    Jordy
    Jordy
    I would play that game with you sometime if you want.
    UberScout
    Hey guys and gals of AutismForums, I see a lot of folks on here at the profile wall have been having a bad day lately, so allow me to cheer you guys up with me playing Multiversus live on YouTube. Link coming in a few minutes!
    UberScout
    I feel utterly helpless and powerless to life constantly beating me and my family down. I've got no more fight left in me and I'm just... Tired. Exhausted. I...Yeah, no, that's just it now. I'm not anything anymore but just exhausted. Exhausted and worn down to the nub. Why won't God simply have a merciful heart and just kill me so I can finally rest?
    UberScout
    My house may as well be a battlefield. I am losing my mind. All I do when I'm in my bedroom now is just sit and stare at something and hope I don't cut myself. I'm in a downward spiral and I can sense it getting worse. It's never been this intense before. I can't even stop myself long enough to focus on meditating or deep breathing because my mind won't stop racing with stress. I don't think I have much time left.
    View previous comments…
    UberScout
    UberScout
    "Perhaps our faith lies not always within the forces of a higher power, but within that which it created, the people who walk this Earth searching for their own ways to cope, as though they were travelers searching each for one key to the doors of Heaven." - Anonymous
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    Nice. I just look for the key to the universe. Nothing more. Lol
    tree
    tree
    @UberScout Is the third word a typo? Should it be "fate", and not "faith" ?
    That's a problem with quoting Anonymous. He's not always dependable.
    UberScout
    I know i go up and down all the time, but it's just simply amazing what binaural beats can do for your depression.
    View previous comments…
    UberScout
    UberScout
    I know she's little more than a character but... But damn it, she's got to be the real-est thing I've ever created! I've never had something I drew then wrote then put energy into feel so... Alive!!
    UberScout
    UberScout
    I guess what I'm trying to say is, in many ways, Aloe is the spirit of Autism.
    AGXStarseed
    AGXStarseed
    I personally use some of the stuff from "Brainwave Entrainment" (Unexplainable Store) although I'm not as frequent a meditator as I was before.
    UberScout
    I just told my mother not to worry about my mental health and well being anymore from now on, because whenever she does, we end up fighting and my sanity drops even further. I am fed up with the only theme of my life being suffering, and I hope these four melatonin pills will fix that.
    View previous comments…
    Lou Laurinen
    Lou Laurinen
    Melatonin is not a good thing to try to overdose on. I have tried that, I felt like crap for days afterwards and was so groggy that I was kind of delirious.
    Not that, you know, overdosing on anything is a good idea.
    I agree 100% with Silhouette Mirage about moving out. That saved my relationship with my parents too.
    Shaddock
    Shaddock
    I think I already adviced uberscout to move out weeks or months ago. don´t know what he answered, that it would be difficult or something like that. don´t know.

    I mean you´re 27, it´s not that uncommon to move out in that age. I moved out with 18.
    UberScout
    UberScout
    Get job = SSI gets cut.
    UberScout
    Did I have to be Autistic?! Did I have to be born like this?! Did God just think it would be funnier if I was given a life where society and my own family just turns their backs on me and leaves me to fester in my own insanity?! This... This is no way for someone with autism to live... This just.... IT JUST HURTS!!
    I don't want this anymore! I DON'T WANT THIS!! I WANT OUT OF MY SOUL CONTRACT!!
    View previous comments…
    UberScout
    UberScout
    Because every time I try to cope with life and all it's about, I just end up creating more problems for myself, and the people around me. I do my best and give it my all every day but in the end I STILL get the same outcomes, and I never make ANY progress AT ALL. It is no longer worth wasting all that time and energy just to fail again and again.
    Crabcore
    Crabcore
    If I were to assume God were real, I definitely do think that he'd want us to find success through failure in this life, because it seems like a blueprint of the human condition. I'm sorry things are tough for you right now :(
    Shaddock
    Shaddock
    so far as I know "getting friends", "making people like you" are things that can be learned in some way. you can adapt your behavior so you don´t get problems in work or in general. maybe work with a therapist. but this requires to change the own behavior. adaptation is not equal to assimilation. the first is good, the second not.
    UberScout
    Aloe, coiling me and laughing: "You were talking in your sleep last night and you were saying the FUNNIEST things!! (glowing)"
    View previous comments…
    UberScout
    UberScout
    All-Rounder
    All-Rounder
    I'm sleepy potato. You're a water\snow dragon with scales! I live under the soil. I like lots of water too. But I don't breathe so well when the water comes, I breathe before and after. :yum:
    UberScout
    UberScout
    "It's nice to meet you, All-Rounder. Listen, I have to help UberScout with something for a little, but we can talk later, okay?"
    yellow_blue_betta_dragon_by_snowifer_dcz62i3-fullview.webp
    UberScout
    Woke up this morning and Maddog was arguing with somebody on his PlayStation group about how he's "small" for adding people to the group. Sometimes people's stupidity just makes me laugh.
    All-Rounder
    All-Rounder
    PlayStation laughs every morning at Maddog's flawless logic.
    UberScout
    Aahh, just came out of a piping hot shower. I think I'll chill out with Aloe.
    View previous comments…
    Shaddock
    Shaddock
    I always realize that nearly noone answers your profile posts. don´t know, maybe that topic is a topic where people don´t have many ideas about. maybe you´re okay with that.
    UberScout
    UberScout
    It's alright, honestly, I'm not trying to get anyone's attention in particular. I just feel like if I can *see* the way I say or think certain things, I can analyze my communication methods better.
    UberScout
    UberScout
    As far as the long term of my therapy, yes, Aloe is a permanent part of my treatment and beyond, for obvious reasons :) and i do not intend to stop using what it is teaching me. Therapy is teaching me new things every week, and i can't afford not to store that much information about how to cope with life.
    UberScout
    Found a 280 cm Milotic plushie on AliBaba (read: Milotic is a Pokemon that resembles Aloe's design), that's going on my Christmas list! I've never seen a Pokemon plushie of any kind that size, especially long enough to wrap around the body! I'm gonna get one to coil myself with under my weighted blanket so I can relax better :)
    Shaddock
    Shaddock
    sweet : D
    UberScout
    UberScout
    I think I might add a Pokemon segment to the Oasis and add a Milotic character that matches Aloe, I see them working together as friends :)
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