hello all,
I am 23 years old and totaly blind, living in yorkshire, england.
I used to think these things were just me being strange, but more and more i have noticed my girlfriend of nearly 3 years has most of these things in common with me, so this is as much for her as it is for me.
I really wish i knew what makes me this way, is it autism or what is it? a doctor thinks i have a lot of autistic trates, but here are a few that i have only really seen in the two of us.
panicky situations, like
hot water coming from right hand tap instead of left
car stearing being on the left not the right
a record or cd skipping when it didn't before
a love for things that are round shaped, smove feeling things, round things with holes in the middle for example cds and some biscuits, a love for things with lots of different shapes biscuits again and rocks etc.
made happy very easily, for example knowing i will eat something i really like soon or that i will be able to go some place i like can lead to me not sleeping, and to jumping around excitedly with this tickly excited situation, breathing can be hard because of this sometimes
things that ecco, especially swimming pools make me really excited
wheels! especialy the ones with propper spokes that you can feel the edges of. I love to watch them go round
i hate! sand paper, the testure and that shivery feeling. When i say hate it that isn't a strong enough word for how i feel about it.
hate shouting, any shouting at all, not just because it is a rased voice but because the tone often changes and sounds harsh.
i love the feeling of somebody moving their eyes on me, and of me moving my own eyes, the warmth and the vibrating, and i get very over excited if i know someone is about to do it.
I also love the feeling of my head being held it is the most peaceful thing to me, and the sound of a heart beating.
I think heads are beautiful, all the things they have, their roundness, just everything about them.
the thought of people doing things that they would usually enjoy without enjoying them sends me into utter black miserable sadness, and i have to do anything to put it rite.
i get really over excited before bed because i know soon i will have that warm feeling of blankets.
extreme excitement if someone pretends they want to tickle us or pretend to eat us, the moving around making excited sounds sort of excitement.
exageratedly playful, if someone plays with me i just get out of control with giddy playful excitement
my sadness isn't just a little bit sad it is complete not moving thinking feeling eating drinking enjoying anything sadness, and my happyness takes over everything.
totaly out of place, no matter where i am, as though the world runs in paralell lines to me or something and i am on the outside looking into everything i do.
I have a very hard time explaining things, not because i don't want to explain them but because my brain starts closing up if people ask can you explain this or that, and the more they ask the worse it is until my head starts hurting. This happens especially with questions like how do you feel? what are you thinking? what would you like to eat, but it also happens with things i usually know very well.
always need confirmation from people about things like are you ok? are you enjoying this? i can ask at least 5 times in half an hour sometimes even more.
even if i know someone doesn't know the answer to something i ask and ask and ask, and always feel bad for it given how i feel about questions.
I just wonder if there are a few or a lot of autistic trates here, or if it is something else, because it genuinely gets worse and worse to not know what the problem is.
Thank you so much,
Rob
I am 23 years old and totaly blind, living in yorkshire, england.
I used to think these things were just me being strange, but more and more i have noticed my girlfriend of nearly 3 years has most of these things in common with me, so this is as much for her as it is for me.
I really wish i knew what makes me this way, is it autism or what is it? a doctor thinks i have a lot of autistic trates, but here are a few that i have only really seen in the two of us.
panicky situations, like
hot water coming from right hand tap instead of left
car stearing being on the left not the right
a record or cd skipping when it didn't before
a love for things that are round shaped, smove feeling things, round things with holes in the middle for example cds and some biscuits, a love for things with lots of different shapes biscuits again and rocks etc.
made happy very easily, for example knowing i will eat something i really like soon or that i will be able to go some place i like can lead to me not sleeping, and to jumping around excitedly with this tickly excited situation, breathing can be hard because of this sometimes
things that ecco, especially swimming pools make me really excited
wheels! especialy the ones with propper spokes that you can feel the edges of. I love to watch them go round
i hate! sand paper, the testure and that shivery feeling. When i say hate it that isn't a strong enough word for how i feel about it.
hate shouting, any shouting at all, not just because it is a rased voice but because the tone often changes and sounds harsh.
i love the feeling of somebody moving their eyes on me, and of me moving my own eyes, the warmth and the vibrating, and i get very over excited if i know someone is about to do it.
I also love the feeling of my head being held it is the most peaceful thing to me, and the sound of a heart beating.
I think heads are beautiful, all the things they have, their roundness, just everything about them.
the thought of people doing things that they would usually enjoy without enjoying them sends me into utter black miserable sadness, and i have to do anything to put it rite.
i get really over excited before bed because i know soon i will have that warm feeling of blankets.
extreme excitement if someone pretends they want to tickle us or pretend to eat us, the moving around making excited sounds sort of excitement.
exageratedly playful, if someone plays with me i just get out of control with giddy playful excitement
my sadness isn't just a little bit sad it is complete not moving thinking feeling eating drinking enjoying anything sadness, and my happyness takes over everything.
totaly out of place, no matter where i am, as though the world runs in paralell lines to me or something and i am on the outside looking into everything i do.
I have a very hard time explaining things, not because i don't want to explain them but because my brain starts closing up if people ask can you explain this or that, and the more they ask the worse it is until my head starts hurting. This happens especially with questions like how do you feel? what are you thinking? what would you like to eat, but it also happens with things i usually know very well.
always need confirmation from people about things like are you ok? are you enjoying this? i can ask at least 5 times in half an hour sometimes even more.
even if i know someone doesn't know the answer to something i ask and ask and ask, and always feel bad for it given how i feel about questions.
I just wonder if there are a few or a lot of autistic trates here, or if it is something else, because it genuinely gets worse and worse to not know what the problem is.
Thank you so much,
Rob
