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What's the most unsuitable job you've had?

I've applied for several jobs lately, including sales positions despite the fact I'm too honest for my own good sometimes, as I said in the thread in the employment section from earlier, I doubt I'll get the one at Halford's, they want someone who can work weekends.

Meh, I tried.
 
Telemarketer for a newspaper. Although that does remind me of a mini-story from that job...

Co-worker: I just got off the phone with (politician who hates all media, trust me on this). The only thing that could be worse is talking to (talk radio host with annoying voice).
Me: You realize that (talk radio host) is a columnist for this paper, right?
 
Selling these crappy nutritional drinks. I think it was a pyramid scheme. I tried for months and managed to sell one bottle to my dad who never even opened it
 
PR.

Which I kind of sensed even before starting the job, since I'm the complete opposite of a kiss***, but bills and student loan needed to be paid. Needless to say, bluntness and failure to idolize guests based on the sole pretense that they have a pompous job name, or a well-known last name, aren't exactly qualities in that field. I can coordinate an event like nobody's business, though, but I'll hate myself when the day is over from all the faking I'd have to pull.

Oh, and switchboard operator. Hate speaking on the phone. First experience of an unfair manager, who'd let all of the permanent members on the team take as much time as they wanted for breaks, pick their schedule, and leave early, while the other girl & I who had a fixed-term contract were submitted to blind discipline. And then the other girl started acting up, and... we'd both get punished for whatever she'd do, even if I wasn't scheduled at the time she'd pull her foolish acts. I was happy to turn down the contract renewal offer...
 
Traffic clerk.

In hindsight the position of router would have been more suited to me.

As a traffic clerk one of my duties was to detail the drivers, let them know what jobs they had to complete during their shift.

As I saw it, the items needed delivering and someone had to do it. Drivers are employed to do just that right?

Such babies. It was like trying to persuade a bunch of petulant nine year olds to do the work they were getting paid to do.

A manager once told me "Be their friend until they want something"
Social niceties, manipulation and cohersion wasn't in my skill set.

The rest of the job was great, just the persuading people part.
 
Sales assistant in a clothing store, apparently telling people that I think the clothes are ugly or that they don't suit them isn't a good sales technique.
 
I got conned into managing an Exxon service station with a convenience store and full repair and motor vehicle state safety inspection garage.

What can I say,the internal combustion engine and motor vehicles were always special interests and I was promised the moon because it was already in existence.
A very failing existence.

Corporate and I had very different ideas of how it should have been done.
I walked away after a year of torment with not enough return profits for my efforts.

Let me put it another way,Mr. Gasoline Azz got disgusted enough with Exxon to never buy their fuel again :p
 
In my twenties I was grabbed out of secretarial pool working in the 'rag trade.' "You'll be perfect" they said. In the heat of the summer I would stand on a wooden box in pantyhose a slip and underwear, while they pinned on and altered women's wool suits and office wear. A living mannequin, that they would jab with pins. Often they would say things like, "you need to lose some there, and poke at my rear end", as if I could slice parts of my body off.

Then I would have to walk around in these clothes, inside their showroom in high heels, in wool suits and nylon and acrylic blouses, dripping with sweat. Uck, three months total until I quit.
 
Mia said:
In my twenties I was grabbed out of secretarial pool working in the 'rag trade.' "You'll be perfect" they said. In the heat of the summer I would stand on a wooden box in pantyhose a slip and underwear, while they pinned on and altered women's wool suits and office wear. A living mannequin, that they would jab with pins. Often they would say things like, "you need to lose some there, and poke at my rear end", as if I could slice parts of my body off.

Then I would have to walk around in these clothes, inside their showroom in high heels, in wool suits and nylon and acrylic blouses, dripping with sweat. Uck, three months total until I quit.
Click to expand...
Oh, I hear you. I did something similar and lasted about 3 days. Couldn't stand changing in front of the ladies who worked the showroom (especially since the changing area was next to a huge window with no curtains, hello, friendly people working across the street and leering at me) or being touched while they made the adjustments ahead of the modeling part.
I'd forgotten about it, though.
 
the_tortoise said:
Door to door canvasser (soliciting donations for charity).
Click to expand...

I had an interview for something similar a while back.

However, if I'd known about the door to door aspect I would've declined the interview, I don't drive so getting between clients would've been a nightmare unless they were all local.
 
I worked in a very busy and sleazy "fun pub" behind the bar where on a Friday and Saturday night the bar used to be constantly 3+ rows thick of people trying to get served, I knew it was ridiculous and that's why I did it to show that I could do it, it was roughly 30 years ago however when I was only 18. I was still a virgin at the time and the staff + doorman would take the p**s out of me all the time for it after hours, it was a very sleazy bar where people regularly had sex in the toilets and picked up all the time, in fact I found out that there was even prostitutes working there and at least one was working behind the bar with me.

One night when I wasn't working and was quite drunk, unknown to me the door staff paid one of the prostitutes to have sex with me as they became obsessed with me losing my virginity, I remember being dragged round the back and having my shirt buttons ripped off, I was very put off my her cheap perfume which I will never forget and I when she went for my trousers I pushed her off, I later found out and I was in disgrace with the door staff who then kept saying I must be gay (I'm definitely not), they genuinely couldn't understand why I didn't and wouldn't have sex with her, but they didn't waste her, one of the door staff had sex with her after hours in the dining area in front of all of us to show me how it should be done, that is what the place was like and seeing sex and also oral sex even when the bar was open was common place.

Another night after hours I was "debagged", which involved being held down by multiple people including the door staff while the barmaids took pictures of my privates ready to put on the public wall, yes it was assault, but in those days you didn't think to complain and the manager was in on it too along with his gangster friends who you were warned never to cross and always serve first (they were well known dodgy names in the area).

The manager who was to say the very least less than lawful I won't name, but he is surprisingly still around and now owns various nightclubs along with his 2 brothers, I don't personally see him any more, but the information is readily available and his name is still known around the area.
 
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Trash man (or boy, in my case). The guy I was working with didn't have his usual crew so I was quite the burden...sucked at lifting the bins when needed. Nothing like the fresh smell of garbage in the morning to get you going too.

It was temporary placement, there was an office that took people in for paid work for companies who were short a couple hands and needed the extra muscle. It was same day pay and I needed to get out there and do something, really didn't have much of a choice at the time. Also did work at a fab shop during my time there which wasn't as bad, though I got in on a get-rich-quick scheme with a bunch of scrap metal and the rest of the temps. Got my cut and kept it shut ;)
 
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