what if they dont understand :(

[Rainbowpride]

Hey
Av not been around in a while
things are ok with me my husband still has to come with me on the buses
We have been going to a church that is big and has music good the people there are nice but i hardly know what to say dont want to say the wrong things
dont want to brake there rules dont want to upset anyone
When they pray they touch you sometimes its ok but am too scared to tell them not to just in case i break the rules
i like this church what if they say i cant go there anymore
Am scared am going to have a meltdown there
what if they dont understand

 

[King_Oni]

I don't know how much it would "break rules" to state you don't like being touched. That's just a personal thing anyone has to deal with when they interact with you. It's a matter of respecting peoples boundaries. I guess accidental touching can happen and that's something I wouldn't fret over too much, but if they're touching you extensively, and you don't like it, I'd make no issue out of it and tell them, or at least talk to the one in charge there. Maybe he/she can bring it up so others are at least informed about it.

 

[DogwoodTree]

I go to a church where people usually touch you when they pray for you, too. But churches also know they have to be very careful not to touch someone who doesn't want to be touched, because they don't want to be sued or have someone arrested. So nearly every time, the person asks permission just before praying, especially if it's a male praying for a female.

That said, I'm always afraid to say no, especially since, when I first started going there, I was trying to make a point to myself that I would make myself be okay with touching, so I said okay a bunch of times. Now I'm afraid to change my answer. But...I think that's more my own fear talking, and I really think they would be respectful and not think much of it once I start asking for no touching. They've already started backing off from hugging because I don't particularly hug back.

 

[watersprite]

It's always okay to tell people that you do not want to share physical touch.

 

[Warmheart]

How about meeting with the minister to discuss your concerns? He/she might have some super ideas and encouragement.

 

[Nitro]

I would tend to think that a house of worship should be quite tolerant of all people,not just a select few. From what I understand of religion,all humans are equal in the creator's eyes. An announcement should not make a flap in a church if it is good for anyone in the congregation,so I wouldn't see it as a problem at all if you were to ask for some consideration.

 

[Rainbowpride]

haven't been able to go to church today as i was ill it was going to be a carol service for Christmas
I have IBS and my stomach is really bad at the moment went out earlier today and i was in a lot of pain had to get s taxi home because i was in so much pain
the carol service was at tonight at 6.30 pm
I will talk to the prayer people next time am there hopefully am able to go to the church next week i know the pastors wife she nice
I also was feel bad for missing church things i feel like i did something wrong by not going but if am ill am ill

 

[Nitro]

haven't been able to go to church today as i was ill it was going to be a carol service for Christmas
I have IBS and my stomach is really bad at the moment went out earlier today and i was in a lot of pain had to get s taxi home because i was in so much pain
the carol service was at tonight at 6.30 pm
I will talk to the prayer people next time am there hopefully am able to go to the church next week i know the pastors wife she nice
I also was feel bad for missing church things i feel like i did something wrong by not going but if am ill am ill

Take care of yourself first,your church will understand

 

[AspiePie]

People commonly don't unless they know you well?