We are quiet, but we are trying

[grommet]

We may seem quiet, just sitting, but we're trying. We are trying to talk to some one. OR we are building the courage to go somewhere knowing we might have to talk to some one. We aren't just sitting, we really are trying.

I think a lot of aspies fight small battles every day. You can't see them if you look but inside, the fight is there.

I was very frightened to go to a store, but I could not keep putting it off. I made myself go. My fear there is all the people who talk to you when you are there. They won't leave you alone. I went anyway, after weeks. I tried something I had not before. I did not speak at all. I nodded when they asked me questions and I tried not to face anyone head-on. For some reason it worked and they let me alone without making me talk. I worked on going there for such a long time.

It took me years to ride the bus. The inside of a bus is like a circus exploding. Colors and noise and people everywhere and everyone so close and the bus is moving and I have to know understand where it is and remember where I am going and figure out how to get off. I can't make sense of the movement of the crowd. That was a battle.

There is an aspie saying, "You know you're aspie if you are more afraid of the traffic than the bungee jumping you are driving to." For me it's true. It's not the things that happen in the hospital, it's the people there.

I've been to aspie meetings and met people who are so different but we all seem to have things in common. One I noticed the most is how hard people seem to be working on small things. Like coming to the meeting at all. Not moving around too much while there, talking enough, or not over-talking. I saw how hard people worked and how hard they tried to hide that they were working so hard.

Aspies may seem like they are sitting there not doing anything at all, but inside there's a battle.

 

[metalminx24]

I really like this. Eloquent.

 

[Nacho]

There is an aspie saying, "You know you're aspie if you are more afraid of the traffic than the bungee jumping you are driving to." For me it's true. It's not the things that happen in the hospital, it's the people there.

I loved this.

 

[Mr. Cat]

I really need a shirt that states this.

 

[Jimbo]

The sad thing is that we feel like we have to try to be something we are not. While I have gotten more comfortable with being social as I have gotten older, I have also learned to be happy with my true self.

 

[David Larson]

I like this; very well spoken. I'm going to use that saying.

Battle we do indeed.

 

[grommet]

Hard to talk today but thank you everyone and Sportster, that is very much like what I go through. In my head I am begging to get out of the store. My worst experience ever was one time inside my landlord's office. I was overwhelmed and I did not know what was happening with their questions and some paperwork and I was screaming and begging inside for it to be over. I have never wanted to leave a place so much.

By the way in my post I apologize for typing mistakes. In particular I did not mean to put the word "or" in all capital letters. I have made an agreement with myself to allow the errors in exchange for being able to talk. I am sorry about the incon ...

[cable repair man just came and went. I will be very jumpy all day now. I hope I don't tic badly for the rest of the day. I talked to him normally (I lie) but it costs so much. Can't write more now but thank you everyone. I think that is the right thing to say.]