Background to the story: I've been living at home with my parents, having very little social interaction other than one Aikido class and one therapy session every week for the last 6 months. Bear this in mind.
I went to an Aikido seminar this weekend. It started on Friday night and ran through Sunday afternoon. I stayed at a friend's house close by so my parents didn't have to shuttle me back and forth (I live far away, and there was lots of social events scheduled outside of class time). I had never stayed at this friend's house overnight, but I know him very well, am very comfortable with him, and he gave me the spare room so I had a private place to cave as needed.
I had a hellish day on Friday, but was able to put it all out of my mind by the time I got to class Friday night. Of course, my friend was instantly ready to introduce me to the visiting master who would be teaching the seminar, and I hadn't even taken my shoes off and emptied my pockets for class yet! I got through the awkward introduction and a few minutes of chit-chat, then disappeared onto the mat for the evening class. Friday night the class was very fun. One person tested for black belt that night, passed the test, and we all went out to eat together in celebration. I did just fine for this social event, even though my therapist is one of the instructors of the school, and in attendance at all the social events. That night, I didn't get much sleep due to being in a new environment and the excitement of the evening/anticipation of the weekend. I tried, but I just couldn't turn my brain off enough to sleep, I was busy listening to all the noises of the new place. I did get a couple of hours of sleep eventually though.
Saturday morning I was tired and had some extra motion going on in my head from lack of sleep, but I knew I didn't have to do any rolling if I didn't feel like it (they know about some of my physical issues at the school). We got there super early, so I did some kata from my style (Aikido is not my style!) to warm up. Several students were trying to do a spinning side kick, but no one knew how so I taught a quick 10 minute lesson on the spinning side kick. The morning class lasted about 3 hours, there was a lot of talking and not much doing, but what we did do, I did pretty well.However, there was so much movement and the fluorescent lights were flickering so much, that I was pretty nauseated from all the motion in my head. By the time we broke for lunch I didn't want to eat with everyone again, so I had someone drop me off at a salad bar nearby and ate lunch alone. It was then I realized how completely exhausted I was. Not so much physically, since I had a grand time walking back to the dojo, but I couldn't stand the thought of interacting with another human being for the rest of the day. I was done with social and informational processing.
I got back to the dojo and knew I needed a nap before I either collapsed or had a meltdown, so I told my friend I was sitting out the next session and found some chairs to plotz on. I wanted to go into the second gym, but didn't know if there would be another class in there or not. I could have asked the head instructor, but I didn't want to talk to anyone. At this point, my brain was totally shutting down, no coherent logic, body wouldn't cooperate properly, so I made a political mistake and collapsed in the chairs in the observation area, which unfortunately was within sight of the visiting master teaching the class (apparently one doesn't sleep in front of visiting royalty). I was right next to the vending machines, which were buzzing at just the right frequency to be good white noise and somewhat hypnotic at the same time. I'm not gonna say I slept, but my body did that twitching thing and I let my brain just free-wheel, but didn't let it work at processing stimuli. I guess I stayed that way for about an hour, then finally felt good enough to come out of that state. After fielding several inquiries of "are you ok?" after that class ended, I felt better enough to at least go sit in the third class and listen, but participating was still out of the question.
After that class ended, I had about two hours to rest before a big party that everyone was invited to. I had already agreed to go, but REALLY didn't want to go socialize anymore. So I spent most of those two hours back at my friend's house, stretched out on my bed in a dark, quiet room with a blanket over my head, again resting my brain and not letting it process any stimuli. This break allowed me the strength necessary to attend yet another party and be mostly sociable. I actually had a fun time once I got a little sake into me.
I was wondering if this irresistible urge to rest was an Aspie shutdown, or something else? I literally felt like if I didn't get a nap, I was gonna either collapse standing up, or lash out irrationally.
I went to an Aikido seminar this weekend. It started on Friday night and ran through Sunday afternoon. I stayed at a friend's house close by so my parents didn't have to shuttle me back and forth (I live far away, and there was lots of social events scheduled outside of class time). I had never stayed at this friend's house overnight, but I know him very well, am very comfortable with him, and he gave me the spare room so I had a private place to cave as needed.
I had a hellish day on Friday, but was able to put it all out of my mind by the time I got to class Friday night. Of course, my friend was instantly ready to introduce me to the visiting master who would be teaching the seminar, and I hadn't even taken my shoes off and emptied my pockets for class yet! I got through the awkward introduction and a few minutes of chit-chat, then disappeared onto the mat for the evening class. Friday night the class was very fun. One person tested for black belt that night, passed the test, and we all went out to eat together in celebration. I did just fine for this social event, even though my therapist is one of the instructors of the school, and in attendance at all the social events. That night, I didn't get much sleep due to being in a new environment and the excitement of the evening/anticipation of the weekend. I tried, but I just couldn't turn my brain off enough to sleep, I was busy listening to all the noises of the new place. I did get a couple of hours of sleep eventually though.
Saturday morning I was tired and had some extra motion going on in my head from lack of sleep, but I knew I didn't have to do any rolling if I didn't feel like it (they know about some of my physical issues at the school). We got there super early, so I did some kata from my style (Aikido is not my style!) to warm up. Several students were trying to do a spinning side kick, but no one knew how so I taught a quick 10 minute lesson on the spinning side kick. The morning class lasted about 3 hours, there was a lot of talking and not much doing, but what we did do, I did pretty well.However, there was so much movement and the fluorescent lights were flickering so much, that I was pretty nauseated from all the motion in my head. By the time we broke for lunch I didn't want to eat with everyone again, so I had someone drop me off at a salad bar nearby and ate lunch alone. It was then I realized how completely exhausted I was. Not so much physically, since I had a grand time walking back to the dojo, but I couldn't stand the thought of interacting with another human being for the rest of the day. I was done with social and informational processing.
I got back to the dojo and knew I needed a nap before I either collapsed or had a meltdown, so I told my friend I was sitting out the next session and found some chairs to plotz on. I wanted to go into the second gym, but didn't know if there would be another class in there or not. I could have asked the head instructor, but I didn't want to talk to anyone. At this point, my brain was totally shutting down, no coherent logic, body wouldn't cooperate properly, so I made a political mistake and collapsed in the chairs in the observation area, which unfortunately was within sight of the visiting master teaching the class (apparently one doesn't sleep in front of visiting royalty). I was right next to the vending machines, which were buzzing at just the right frequency to be good white noise and somewhat hypnotic at the same time. I'm not gonna say I slept, but my body did that twitching thing and I let my brain just free-wheel, but didn't let it work at processing stimuli. I guess I stayed that way for about an hour, then finally felt good enough to come out of that state. After fielding several inquiries of "are you ok?" after that class ended, I felt better enough to at least go sit in the third class and listen, but participating was still out of the question.
After that class ended, I had about two hours to rest before a big party that everyone was invited to. I had already agreed to go, but REALLY didn't want to go socialize anymore. So I spent most of those two hours back at my friend's house, stretched out on my bed in a dark, quiet room with a blanket over my head, again resting my brain and not letting it process any stimuli. This break allowed me the strength necessary to attend yet another party and be mostly sociable. I actually had a fun time once I got a little sake into me.
I was wondering if this irresistible urge to rest was an Aspie shutdown, or something else? I literally felt like if I didn't get a nap, I was gonna either collapse standing up, or lash out irrationally.
