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[Cactus]

No one ever tries to talk to me when I'm out. I must be REALLY weird.

 

[stans]

In Aldous Huxley's "Ape and Essence" he had a character who simply wanted to be left alone who wrote on his gate "The leeches' kiss the squid's embrace the prurient ape's defiling touch and do I like the human race, no, not much.
Sometimes that is an extreme view of people but understandable when you just want to be left alone
Huxley was an Aspie.

 

[stans]

No one ever tries to talk to me when I'm out. I must be REALLY weird.

Cactus,
The others are also in their own worlds. It isn't easy for many of us to be open to everything.

 

[Theta.G]

Totally understand where you're coming from.

I think there's a few reasons why people do this.
- If you wear anything that could be considered provocative by them, they may attempt to take out their on you, even though it comes from something not related to you at all. Just like how they would if they saw it on a twitter post or something, no thought... Just reactions. (What a MAGA hat would be to a liberal, what a netflix shirt would be to anyone who opposes netflix, what wearing a fur coat would mean to an animal rights activist in your presence. Just a few examples.)

- Part of it may have to the with the city as well. I've lived in quite few different cities and the general attitude of the population does change from place to place. In some a large majority of the population mind their own business relatively neutral, in others they are a happy and upbeat populace, Then you have those who are just looking to argue. depressed populations full of pee and vinegar.
- The third is the "vibe" a person puts off.
There could be a 10/10 beautiful woman who walks around in the city and has a cheery personality that eminates from her. She gets hit on by 20 guys a day. Just out and about.
Her twin on the side of the city is the exact same except she has a resting ***** face and dreadful kind of vibe. (Sorry idk what word to replace that with so best i could is asterisks) she doesn't get hit on by anyone throughout that day, maybe only on rare occasion.

Ask yourself what kind of vibe your putting out. How do you feel when your out in the city. Would that have anything to do with it? Are you expecting someone to approach you? Or are you care free and happy? Just minding your own business?
Are you putting out a strong or weak vibe, posture or body language? Were you wearing anything specific that would be seen as odd? If you tried to view that city objectively what kind of populace inhabits the areas you visit?

You don't have to answer those here just reflect it to yourself.

 

[rollerskate]

Every time I go into the city I have people who I didn't even make eye contact with start talking crap. I think It's because It was a weekday and I wasn't dressed in business casual...idk that's all I can figure. There was no reason, I didn't even look at them. Anybody have a similar experience? I didn't have twinkie smeared all over my face, I wasn't doing anything at all to provoke these random utterances. This happened several times so it's not the person. Don't give me the "I've never seen people act like that" bit. I wasn't stoned I was stone cold straight.

Well, needless to say, I don't like people that much anymore. You wouldn't either. I used to be a hippy and was all like, love everybody but not anymore. I find myself filled with hatred. The people who were my friends and family are just like everybody else. I feel like they only have me around because of pity and I hate that! They feel better about themselves because, in their withered brains, they are better than somebody. I am so angry now It is getting unhealthy.

Can somebody please tell me they have had a similar experience and how they dealt with it. PLEASE?!?

Distance yourself from people like that. If you can't because you live with them, work towards gaining greater independence so you can. And please. Get out of a metro city if you are in one (sounds like you are). They tend to suck up souls, and those people snapping on you for no reason are zombies.

And if you need to escape for a while, there's nothing wrong with isolating down to minimize your negative contact with others. Just don't isolate yourself down from yourself. Treat yourself well. Recharge to face the world again someday.

I'm not going to argue with your experiences, at all, because it does indeed seem like many have gotten swept up into darkness lately. Part of it is stress, I think. The other part has been some negative influences and extremism in our culture. But this too, like all things, will pass over time. The benefit it's bringing is that it's waking some people up, BIG TIME. And they're doing things to bring about change.

I.E. Nope. You're not alone at all. And a lot of us are kind of hiding out, waiting for the storm to blow over, while we recharge to fight again another day.

 

[ftfipps]

@rollerskate I would never do the things people did or say what people said to me, I know that. I just got off the pharmaceutical drugs. That was a huge victory. I feel like I will one day be able to converse with NT's correctly but It is going to be a long hard road of trial and error.

 

[guitarandtattoos]

Every time I go into the city I have people who I didn't even make eye contact with start talking crap. I think It's because It was a weekday and I wasn't dressed in business casual...idk that's all I can figure. There was no reason, I didn't even look at them. Anybody have a similar experience? I didn't have twinkie smeared all over my face, I wasn't doing anything at all to provoke these random utterances. This happened several times so it's not the person. Don't give me the "I've never seen people act like that" bit. I wasn't stoned I was stone cold straight.

Well, needless to say, I don't like people that much anymore. You wouldn't either. I used to be a hippy and was all like, love everybody but not anymore. I find myself filled with hatred. The people who were my friends and family are just like everybody else. I feel like they only have me around because of pity and I hate that! They feel better about themselves because, in their withered brains, they are better than somebody. I am so angry now It is getting unhealthy.

Can somebody please tell me they have had a similar experience and how they dealt with it. PLEASE?!?

Just be the best person you can be and it doesn't matter what anyone has got to say because you have a clean heart and doing what you can.

 

[ftfipps]

Distance yourself from people like that. If you can't because you live with them, work towards gaining greater independence so you can. And please. Get out of a metro city if you are in one (sounds like you are). They tend to suck up souls, and those people snapping on you for no reason are zombies.

And if you need to escape for a while, there's nothing wrong with isolating down to minimize your negative contact with others. Just don't isolate yourself down from yourself. Treat yourself well. Recharge to face the world again someday.

I'm not going to argue with your experiences, at all, because it does indeed seem like many have gotten swept up into darkness lately. Part of it is stress, I think. The other part has been some negative influences and extremism in our culture. But this too, like all things, will pass over time. The benefit it's bringing is that it's waking some people up, BIG TIME. And they're doing things to bring about change.

I.E. Nope. You're not alone at all. And a lot of us are kind of hiding out, waiting for the storm to blow over, while we recharge to fight again another day.

I blame social media for people acting that way. Their brains have been rewired so they have no attention span whatsoever. They are basically just pigeons...a pigeon sees something in it's peripheral view and immediately flies off. A person sees someone they don't know, I'll hurl an insult at them.

 

[guitarandtattoos]

A person sees someone they don't know, I'll hurl an insult at them.

@ftfipps
While I agree with your initial statements this portion I've never experienced random people bothering me like that. Then again I've heard I give off a vibe of being the quiet but will fk you up person. The only people that have treated me / acted like this towards me were losers on the internet hiding behind their keyboards or family abusing the fact that they are family and they know that I'm not trying to perpetuate that dysfunction. If a stranger in RL insulted you (for absolutely no reason at all) you just give them the finger. if they wanna do something and they assault you kick their butt.

 

[Mr Allen]

People who make a thing of the "no eye contact" issue seriously need to shut up IMO.

Like in 2007 I had an interview with a local branch of Remploy in Town, and this stupid woman delighted in pointing out, amongst other things, my lack of eye contact, I didn't even know it was an issue at the time either.

Everything was wrong with the interview, by rights I should've sued the knickers off her for blatant discrimination IMO, she even accused me to my face of LYING about every word of my CV because even now, almost 12 years later, I don't have any named references on my CV.

 

[ftfipps]

@guitarandtattoos I know, I had never experienced it before 2017, either. I just expect it now, ahead of time. I'm not gonna tear up over it. Yeah, It hurt when It first happened but now I know what to expect. I would never give anyone the finger or commit violence. Neither side wins. If someone insulted me I would laugh at them.

 

[ftfipps]

People who make a thing of the "no eye contact" issue seriously need to shut up IMO.

Like in 2007 I had an interview with a local branch of Remploy in Town, and this stupid woman delighted in pointing out, amongst other things, my lack of eye contact, I didn't even know it was an issue at the time either.

Everything was wrong with the interview, by rights I should've sued the knickers off her for blatant discrimination IMO, she even accused me to my face of LYING about every word of my CV because even now, almost 12 years later, I don't have any named references on my CV.

I couldn't agree more. I avoided eye contact with everyone but family for many years. These injustices in places of employment you speak of go on every day. Don't try to make sense of it. Just continue to be a person of morals.

 

[Fino]

I blame social media for people acting that way. Their brains have been rewired so they have no attention span whatsoever. They are basically just pigeons...a pigeon sees something in it's peripheral view and immediately flies off. A person sees someone they don't know, I'll hurl an insult at them.

I have ADHD and have worked with kids with ADHD and ADD, and I'm not saying I'm all mad and offended and all that exciting stuff, but I do think it's a tad offensive to exaggerate the lack of attention span of people like that. I've been teaching for ten years, and, unless I simply live in a magical area, it's simply not true. Only the diagnosed children are as you describe.

 

[ftfipps]

@Fino I wasn't badmouthing people with disabilities. It is unfortunate that you felt offended. Sometimes I say things less than tactfully and I do not think of how it may offend people, and I never want to be offensive, especially on here. I just have strong feelings and they come across in my writing. Please know I would never do that.

 

[Fino]

@Fino I wasn't badmouthing people with disabilities. It is unfortunate that you felt offended. Sometimes I say things less than tactfully and I do not think of how it may offend people, and I never want to be offensive, especially on here. I just have strong feelings and they come across in my writing. Please know I would never do that.

The way I read was it like when someone says they're autistic and another says, "Well, everyone is a little bit."

Or, "Everyone gets sad sometimes," in response to someone's depression.

But maybe I misunderstood! I appreciate your response, and I don't have any negative feelings towards you (and now I have positive), so thank you!

 

[ftfipps]

@Fino Sometimes we infer things from what we read online that may not be the other's intention. Your intentions were noble and I respect that.

 

[rollerskate]

I blame social media for people acting that way. Their brains have been rewired so they have no attention span whatsoever. They are basically just pigeons...a pigeon sees something in it's peripheral view and immediately flies off. A person sees someone they don't know, I'll hurl an insult at them.

It's more than social media. It's the culture. Everyone is rushed, overworked, and underpaid. They're all trying to live the good life, give the impression of being happy and successful, and they're not. They're made to feel like they're insignificant as human beings if they're not. That it's their fault if they're not. And that they should look down on anyone that's not. Kiss the boots off anyone that is. There's no land to connect and ground with. No peace and quiet to unwind with. And nowhere to go to scream.

Social media is everywhere. It is not an influence unto itself. It merely reflects and intensifies the culture in which one exists. If you live out in the country, you really don't use it any less than in a city. Your content is vastly different, though. And besides that, social media is currently in its final death throes. Digital marketing is already starting to adapt to the change and pull back from focusing on it so hard. When is the last time you saw a major advertiser place an ad on Facebook? ... probably haven't even noticed, but it's mostly startups and SMB now advertising there. The ads are growing more and more repetitive, as well. There's not as large of a pool of ads to display any more. And noticed your posts aren't getting liked so much any more? Your friends list isn't posting anywhere near as frequently?

That's because it's dying.

And this issue existed in metro areas long before social media even became a thing. For as far back as I can remember, the common sentiment about nearby metro cities has been "people there are mean."