Supporting a friend

[bchamp]

I've posted about this person before.. She used to be my manager, I've always had a crush on her. She's older than me, married(I'll explain more)

I've talked to different friends about this situation I'm in and the answers vary. She reached out to me the other day regarding having a panic attack, I really never knew this side of her.. I always knew she was stressed about her job and all. I visit her store every once in a while to see her, she's always super happy when I do so, gets her mind off of work for a few min...

I talked to a friend at my old job who knew a little bit about her, even though she probably shouldn't. She informed me that this friend of mine is in an abusive relationship, with 3 kids(I knew this). I visited her few days afterwords. Chatted with her a bit about how she's been feeling.. She's quite open with me, and doesn't talk much about her relationship.. I didn't mention what I heard, but I was asking if anything is bothering her at home.. and she just teared up a bit and clearly didn't really want to talk about it. So I moved on, didn't push it.

I never really got the chance to meet her outside of work.. even then she avoids this in text too.. So yeah.. Basically I know something about her I probably shouldn't know.

I really want to support her as a friend, yes I really do like her as well but I'm actually worried about her mental health right now. I always see her with baggy eyes, so on and so forth basically. It's not putting any strain on me, as I really care and happy to talk with her.

 

[Tom]

This would be a lot easier if you didn't have feelings (above friendship) for the lady. You are in a big minefield right now.

 

[BraidedPony]

Maybe there are some single girls your age that would love to have you as a friend?
The married lady really doesn’t need your help and her husband might hurt you if you interfere. It’s a no win situation for you.

 

[bchamp]

Maybe there are some single girls your age that would love to have you as a friend?
The married lady really doesn’t need your help and her husband might hurt you if you interfere. It’s a no win situation for you.

As much as I understand that... We've been great friends, and it's not entirely about me getting having friends with other females? That's not a problem for me...

I don't plan to intervene.. As I am just wanting to find a way to support her. We don't talk on a day to day basis. If you knew someone you are close to is in a bad abusive relationship.. married or not.. you couldn't, just leave it be.

This would be a lot easier if you didn't have feelings (above friendship) for the lady. You are in a big minefield right now.

I've tried to accept that it won't happen, ever. I really just feel happy being close friends with her. Either way, it is hard regardless. I cannot just let her be alone.