Sooner of later, different scares people

[Keigan]

This is stuck in my head.

The saying comes from the movie "the accountant" when the father says those words to his autistic son.

Do you find that people follow through with "Sooner of later, different scares people" - I think that eventually people become scared of us because they can't connect with us, understand us.....

What are you thoughts?

 

[Stitch]

Yes, I think it scares most people. Sorta like we're not equipped to deal with what most people consider 'normal', most people aren't equipped to deal with what society deems 'different'.

However, that's not the case with everyone. Some people don't care if someone's different, and even prefer to hang out with them. Usually what that means is that they're also on the fringes of social norms or are a social outcast themselves.

The best place I've found for not scaring people away has been with non-natives. People who were not born and did not grow up in this culture, and who are in many ways learning what I'm still trying to learn ...all the little social nuances, speech patterns -the language, basically. It's way easier to talk to someone who speaks a different native language than you, because then whatever communication you're able to have, it has to be straightforward and literal because neither of you can understand it otherwise.

I still haven't quite gotten used to the reaction I get when someone realizes I'm not 'normal' (whatever that is). It's never blatantly obvious, but I've spent my entire life learning these tiny little clues and now I can instantly recognize it. Slight changes in how they look at you, how their voice changes, how they treat you as just a little bit stupid and how quickly they try to abandon whatever interaction is going on.

There are so many times where I just try to not talk anymore. I can give loads of nonverbal feedback but I refuse to speak because for some reason, that's when they notice. If I don't have to talk then I can get away with being tagged as shy and/or quiet. If I do accidentally open my mouth I'm officially labeled Not One of Them and, barring a miracle, that's who I forever am in their perception.

 

[Bolletje]

I'm not sure whether my being different scares people, but it sure is the reason why I hold off on disclosing my diagnosis from many people.

 

[xudo]

However, that's not the case with everyone. Some people don't care if someone's different, and even prefer to hang out with them. Usually what that means is that they're also on the fringes of social norms or are a social outcast themselves.

I've definitely found this with the few friends I have. They're all weird and don't fit in, in their own ways.

 

[toothless]

This is stuck in my head.

The saying comes from the movie "the accountant" when the father says those words to his autistic son.

Do you find that people follow through with "Sooner of later, different scares people" - I think that eventually people become scared of us because they can't connect with us, understand us.....

What are you thoughts?

being quite visibly different,i have always scared people, including my own family, teachers, kids, adults, my support staff [many who have refused to work with me] etc.
i am different,so called 'normal people' dont relate to me or connect to me and have the sympathy/empathy of a dead slug so i quite honestly couldnt care less,i find humans totally unrelateable and highly confusing,i dont even recognise them when im visually scanning a room as theyre just an object;part of the furniture to me.
people can think what they want of me,i dont want them they dont want me,that solves the problem.

i guess for people who are searching for a mate [friendship or relationship],its hard as you have to have something really big to override the additional needs you have-for people to look past your issues.
like owning your own house,having a social life,having a car etc something that NTs aspire to have.

 

[WildCat]

I watched the movie about a week or so ago. Out of all the dialogue in there, that one line is now stuck in my head.

People fear what they don't understand, and it's a easily proven fact. I wonder if anyone who's watched the movie really absorbed any of the messages it was trying to convey...especially towards the ending (I'm not going to spoil it here). It's Hollywood, so of course not all of us are "the accountant" in our daily lives, but it's a far cry from Rain Man or any past movies.