TigerTank77
Well-Known Member
I've been trying to get a better understanding of her. On the outside, she seems very cold and disconnected, and there are very few people (myself included) who she'll maintain interpersonal relationships with.
There's an extreme emotional disconnect from everything she does, especially to things that one would normally attribute heavy emotions to. And she seems to relish the idea of being a loner, saying that she could "go the rest of her life without speaking to anyone and be a pleased hermit."
However, she's telling me that she does reciprocate the way I feel (or at least the words and actions attributed to how I feel), but she doesn't understand why there needs to be emotions involved. And the way she talks about us dating possibly dating, feels more like her allowing something to happen, rather than actively seeking it.
At first I thought it was a defense mechanism because she's been hurt, but there's no pain behind her words, just blunt frankness. Or that I was being led on, but there's no evasiveness and false promises, again, just very upfront declarations. Also, it seems like she just doesn't understand. Like my emotions and feelings for her, and romantic emotions feelings in general are like another language to her. She'll occasional try to speak the language because she cares about me and wants to make me happy, but she doesn't understand the context behind anything she says.
I'm aware that you guys can't accurately diagnose her over the internet, but the bottom line is, I really like this girl, and I want things to work out. And if she is in fact autistic, I want to know how to handle something like that, that allows me to respect how she is, while still making it clear how I feel in a way she isn't troubled to understand and can respect.
There's an extreme emotional disconnect from everything she does, especially to things that one would normally attribute heavy emotions to. And she seems to relish the idea of being a loner, saying that she could "go the rest of her life without speaking to anyone and be a pleased hermit."
However, she's telling me that she does reciprocate the way I feel (or at least the words and actions attributed to how I feel), but she doesn't understand why there needs to be emotions involved. And the way she talks about us dating possibly dating, feels more like her allowing something to happen, rather than actively seeking it.
At first I thought it was a defense mechanism because she's been hurt, but there's no pain behind her words, just blunt frankness. Or that I was being led on, but there's no evasiveness and false promises, again, just very upfront declarations. Also, it seems like she just doesn't understand. Like my emotions and feelings for her, and romantic emotions feelings in general are like another language to her. She'll occasional try to speak the language because she cares about me and wants to make me happy, but she doesn't understand the context behind anything she says.
I'm aware that you guys can't accurately diagnose her over the internet, but the bottom line is, I really like this girl, and I want things to work out. And if she is in fact autistic, I want to know how to handle something like that, that allows me to respect how she is, while still making it clear how I feel in a way she isn't troubled to understand and can respect.
