Hello and I’m a newbie. I have a 3 year old grandson and I love him so much. But he is showing signs of being a little ‘different’ and I want to help my daughter to diagnose what I ‘think’ is Autism and provide help where and when I can. He is quiet, likes to play on his own and from time to time has big tantrums. It’s hard to settle him during these tantrums and I’m sure my daughter is concerned and embarrassed when they happen in front of others. Can anyone help please with any suggestions going forward. I’m sure my daughter is not ignoring his demeanour but perhaps she’s just a little afraid of any early diagnosis. Thank you.
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Not sure
- Thread starter Mike0703
- Start date
Get him checked out, or get information from an experienced medical specialist, and observe for a while.
Stay away from amateurs (including me BTW), and be very cautious of any web site that is making money from "young adult" and adult ASDs.
Also be aware that there are people who falsely claim to be ASD for self-serving reasons. it's not likely you'll "bump into" them accidently, but be careful.
Worth checking early in whatever documentation you get from a serious source:
* Timing of development of language skills
* Timing of development of "non-verbal" communication skills.
e.g. (NT toddlers watch the faces of adults they know often and very carefully, and similarly pay attention to and react to tone of voice.
FYI I spent a while (6 weeks or so) around a 2-year old a little while ago, and was lucky enough to watch him go from knowing (and speaking) a few words to framing simple sentences, and simultaneously converting passive to active vocabulary (I think - can't prove that, but its a good fit to my observations).
I'm 90+ % confident that's NT normal behavior, but don't know about the age range such things happen (my kids are adults - I've forgotten all the details).
He threw a few tantrums while I was there, and engaged in what we'd call anti-social behavior in an adult. As all toddlers do.
They don't really start learning emotional regulation until 4 or so (IIRC - check some literature), and they're not done until they're tweens (if they not harmed by a poor upbringing, in which case poor impulse control and "learned narcissism" are possible).
While they can't regulate their emotions, they (naturally) have difficulties regulating their behavior, and they're liable to get temporary "brain locks". A few brief periods of chaos are to be expected.
OFC I can't say if any of what I said is useful for you. I doubt absence of those things is enough to draw any conclusions. But their presence (even the tantrums) is a "non-determining" indication of normal behavior.
Stay away from amateurs (including me BTW), and be very cautious of any web site that is making money from "young adult" and adult ASDs.
Also be aware that there are people who falsely claim to be ASD for self-serving reasons. it's not likely you'll "bump into" them accidently, but be careful.
Worth checking early in whatever documentation you get from a serious source:
* Timing of development of language skills
* Timing of development of "non-verbal" communication skills.
e.g. (NT toddlers watch the faces of adults they know often and very carefully, and similarly pay attention to and react to tone of voice.
FYI I spent a while (6 weeks or so) around a 2-year old a little while ago, and was lucky enough to watch him go from knowing (and speaking) a few words to framing simple sentences, and simultaneously converting passive to active vocabulary (I think - can't prove that, but its a good fit to my observations).
I'm 90+ % confident that's NT normal behavior, but don't know about the age range such things happen (my kids are adults - I've forgotten all the details).
He threw a few tantrums while I was there, and engaged in what we'd call anti-social behavior in an adult. As all toddlers do.
They don't really start learning emotional regulation until 4 or so (IIRC - check some literature), and they're not done until they're tweens (if they not harmed by a poor upbringing, in which case poor impulse control and "learned narcissism" are possible).
While they can't regulate their emotions, they (naturally) have difficulties regulating their behavior, and they're liable to get temporary "brain locks". A few brief periods of chaos are to be expected.
OFC I can't say if any of what I said is useful for you. I doubt absence of those things is enough to draw any conclusions. But their presence (even the tantrums) is a "non-determining" indication of normal behavior.
That's tough position to be in, the caring grandparent, but not the parent. Family dynamics and psychology vary widely. As such, it's difficult to give advice from that perspective. If there is going to be a "stigma" associated with potentially having a child with an ASD, some parents would rather go the route of denial and may even get angry for even suggesting it. You know your daughter.
However...great points made by @Hypnalis. Sometimes it can be difficult to discern "age appropriate" behaviors from what may appear to be "autism-like" behaviors when they are 2-4 years of age. Hypothetically, if he appears to be "regressing", then that throws up some "red flags", but not all autistic children regress, making it sometimes difficult, and furthermore, some appear rather "gifted" by certain metrics or observations, again confusing the issue.
Most pediatricians are well-versed in all of those "age-appropriate" milestones and have a pretty good idea when to seek a specialist to investigate further. Childhood autism is, for whatever reasons, more easily diagnosed than adult autism, at least in part, because the small child hasn't learned to hide or "mask" their autism.
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Welcome, Mike. My nephew was diagnosed with autism at age 2. Your grandchild is not too young for diagnosis. Seek out a qualified, experienced professional.
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