need advice on 4 yr old girl

[Hmcgee12]

Hello, well I don't really know where to start, but we have a 4 yr old daughter, Lily, who on the outside looks like a typical 4 yr old, however I feel has signs of Aspergers. First she's clumsy, always has been the little girl with two left feet, and she knows know stranger, literally doesn't grasp the concept of it. One time we went to a restaurant and she petted the waitresses leg and tried to hold her hand the entire time we ordered. That takes me to personal space, she has no understanding of what that means. It seems she is constantly in peoples bubble often annoying other children in the process. She also walks on the tips of her feet, and cant seem to sit or stand still especially while talking she does this sort of dance twisting and turning. Her language and speech is very advanced and always has been except she sounds like shes 24 instead of 4. Lately I have been noticing a lot of what she says are exact sentences she has heard us say or lines from movies but she uses them in perfect context for the conversation. She has no volume button, her preferred method is loud with a side of loud. She has also started becoming argumentative, I know that's normal but she will literally argue about everything down to the last tiny detail. Also she is still throwing awful tantrums , her last "episode" was because I didn't get any change back from the cashier at Mcdonalds and "you are always supposed to get money back from them" I had to carry her out kicking and screaming because she just wouldn't let it go. Now I see a lot of these as possible Asperger signs but I do not know if she is just a strong willed child. She also has an imaginary friend Unicorn with whom she is obsessed with and she has a weird preoccupation with God when we aren't a very religious family. She is our eldest so chances are this behavior isnt anything to be worried about, but my mommy radar is going off.Please if anyone has any advice or insight I would appreciate it!

 

[wyverary]

Welcome!

If her behavior is proving problematic, and you feel it's too much to handle on your own, your best bet is seeking a professional's opinion. She seems to certainly be displaying autistic tendencies. Have you talked with her pediatrician about it? They might see fit to refer her to a child psychologist (and if they don't, prod them into it). Early intervention is very helpful for those on the autism spectrum; you can help her utilize her gifts, and learn about boundaries, while still letting her be herself.

There are other parents on here, who might be able to give better input than me.

Sorry if my grammar is a little off; I haven't had my morning coffee yet.

 

[Hmcgee12]

Our pediatrician at her last appointment was only concerned with her switching pronouns he/she, and she calls me (mom) Dad and (dad) mom. But I honestly didn't bring up the others things because I didn't want to seem like a neurotic mom : /

 

[Aspergirl4hire]

Your pediatrician may not be qualified to say. This isn't "standard" pediatric care.

I'd reach out into the community for pediatric psychiatrists--and I'd check to make sure that even they had some awareness or experience of autism first, and if so, who they regard as authorities. A look at the Resources section for literature will give you a good eye and ear for trustworthy people.

Another way to get good ones is to lookup professional autism conferences and see who's attended.

Keep on--you're doing the right thing.

 

[Sthira]

Hi Hmcgee12,

Your daughter sounds a lot like my son. We started seeing many of these same things -- never noticed him walking on his tiptoes, but pretty much everything else you mentioned -- a little before he turned 4. It was about at that time that I started commenting to friends that my little boy had suddenly transformed into a argumentative and surly teenager. Anyway, he was diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder several months ago at 4 1/2 years old at our local Kaiser Permenente autism center.

 

[DarkLady]

She definitely sounds like she has Asperger's. That is exactly how I was at her age. My 20th birthday is soon. I was diagnosed age 7 due to a teacher who had an AS nephew spotting some symptoms.