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My Internal Conflict Right Now

I can just solve this by calling them wrong, right?
No. That makes it worse. There is no right and wrong in it. It's all subjective and personal and from a limited POV. Statements of values are not statements of facts. You get over it by saying, "It is okay. I am not in this world to live up to your expectations, and you are not here to live up to mine."
Are you refering to "Us VERSUS Them" as in the opposition of two groups with conflicted interest
There doesn't need to be a conflict. Any detectable difference is all it takes. Humans go looking for reasons to be different. Freud called this the pathology of small differences. Two groups that share 99.9% in common will emphasize that .1% difference rather than celebrate the 99.9% they have in common.

It is as if we are driven to seek out things to fight over, and if there's no fundamental conflict, we'll consider manufacturing one.
-I hate neurotypical society to the point where I think I am and all Autistic people are better than them on a base level
-I know that sounds wrong and creepy but I can't stop thinking about it

-I want to "return what they did to me" (be a complete gaslighting sarcastic (I can't say this next word on here, I'm pretty sure) if I feel like they're insulting me again)
-I know that sounds wrong and creepy but I can't stop thinking about it

-I want to see neurotypicals as not worthy of anything but very basic respect, like they are half-humans with this inherent evil in them beyond their control
-I know that sounds wrong and creepy but I can't stop thinking about it

I want them to feel what it is like to experience them. If they cannot understand it when I'm being nice or not nice, then I'll learn to use their methods and turn them against them.

I know this sounds wrong, I just don't know why.

Please help. Please don't get angry or ban me. I'm not expecting you to be psychologists or anything but please, I hope you're patient with this one.
I know it sounds weird but they are really dark and annoying depending on the person.
Because they lack compassion and geniune caring and just act like disgusting generally.
Like stuff so much food in their mouths like especially city folk, they will eat anything.
And they never stay at home. And really just being around them is like being around dirt and germs, no wonder covid.
Some are better than others but they lack heart.
Anyway I go the other way too where I hate talking about disabled problems all the time.
But it is frustrating when someone is dumber than you because they just have such little understanding in certain matters but it is hard, I really do like some people like that.
It is hard to be a smart person in this world because no one has any qualities that are interesting, they all act the same.
And it is hard when you do not know what you are looking for.
But booksmart is not everything either.
It is just like people actually being clean, decent and interesting.

Like having qualities that are interesting or someone you would like to chat with.
She doesn't do phone sessions?

And she didn't offer to refer you to a substitute?
The situation is fixed now.
Also, I would like you (you're a mod, right?) to take down this thread. I wrote it when I was in a really bad state of mind, I don't want to remember it. People don't need to reply to it as if it's still an ongoing thing.

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