This will probably hurt your feelings, so know that
I know that, and ultimately, this is meant with compassion. I like to treat young people like the older people they aspire to be!
Okay, so I am dating this awesome girl from Canada named Tyra. There is one problem though... my friend Nevin wants her. Alot.
My curiosity is piqued... I don't know how you young whippersnappers do things these days, but is this, like, chatting, messaging, Skyping, Facebooking? How does he know her? I have the same questions as Ereth.
Nevin has physically hurt me in attempts to make me let him date her, and he has gotten his friend to stab me with a pencil (this got him suspended, thank goodness). I'm really afraid Tyra will start to like him, since he is doing alot for her, such as writing a 5-page song for her... If anyone has advice for me, please tell me. Thanks
Just wondering, 'cause, like, if he really wanted to "date" her--why does he have to have you
let him? Are you two "going steady", as they used to say, and not allowed to chat or Facebook with anyone else? So he'll get someone to stab you with a pencil, but he can't chat online with her without your permission?
Please understand that part of my reaction is that I'm not used to interacting with children on here (or in person!), but that's what you are describing here--the behavior of
children. Even if your pubes have started growing in.
Consider this a bit of tough love, because love is tough--
really tough. In the years to come, you'll find out--if a dude really wants a girl, he'll just go for her. He won't ask your permission. And even a girl with a flesh-and-blood boyfriend will entertain attention from desirable prospects. When I was in high school, this one time at a party, I was joking around with a girl who had a boyfriend, and I pretended to grab her butt. She pulled away as I expected, but to my surprise, she stopped and backed up into my hand. I didn't know stuff like that happened! Then she started telling me how unsatisfied she was with her guy, who was a friend of mine, and I wasn't about to do that to him. But she was letting me know I could steal her away.
If she ends up liking him more, she is free to do so. It's a tough pill to swallow, but it's all too true: All Is Fair in Love & War. There are no rules. You never get to own or even control your partner. Even when you're
married. I just had to learn that one, and now I'm not married anymore.
Maturity comes from enduring hard knocks and learning from them. Your maturity level is such that your peers stab each other with pencils. Grown-ups don't even hardly
use pencils. Think about that.
Right now you are a bundle of raging hormones. Enjoy Tyra's company. Just have fun, and don't take it too seriously, even if it feels like the biggest, most wonderful thing that could ever possibly happen. If she likes Nevin, that's
her right. It's a woman's prerogative to change her mind. If you want to keep her interested--know that it's about
her. Make her happy to be chatting with
you!
By the way, and this is another thing I learned the hard way--when you're in a long-distance relationship, and your girl goes off to college, she's going to start being interested in the numerous guys who are there around her in person. Be prepared for the same thing to happen once she starts attending her new high school. That's why it's good to just enjoy your contact with her now. You will experience heartbreak in your life. It's an opportunity to grow from a "boy" to a "man"!
And, à la Ereth and Sass, learn a lesson about Nevin. Aspies can be overly trusting, and befriend the wrong people. So when a guy starts a violent campaign to "let you" interact with your girlfriend, he's the wrong people. And if they don't already, make sure your parents know about this relationship of yours, because that's the responsible, grown-up thing to do.
And really... a
five-page song? Even
American Pie doesn't take up five pages! Is Nevin an Aspie, too?
One more; couldn't resist...
