Losing all interest

[2205]

Hi, I'm 29 and I've noticed a pattern how my interests change over time. I was wondering if anyone else has noticed similar about themselves?

First of all, I don't have one main obsession/interest throughout my life as some aspies do. I rather have many intense interests that change quite often, from few days to few months and they kind of come and go several times, like rotating of interests. Sometimes, if the interest has potential to make money out of eventually, then I've managed to keep that interest for several years (for example music), but it seems to me now that it can't go on forever. Eventually, the "forced" interest becomes more like torture and then I need to quit.
Right now I'm at this point (and I've been there before), where my previous interest has disappeared but unlike most times, a new one hasn't replaced that. I've been trying this "fake it til u make it" approach, where I take a potentially interesting subject and try to research that, but I don't feel about it like I feel about the real interesting subjects. I feel literally bored to death but I have no interest in anything.

tl;dr - Have you ever been literally bored to death, but don't feel like doing anything? Like none of your previous areas of interests appeal to you anymore? How would you deal with that?

 

[Iamnotarabot]

Well i have the same problems, not exactly but very similar.
And after 2 sessions my therapist told me that i might be depressed so its different from simple asperger i guess.

I dont know how to manage that to be honest, but you are not alone in this

 

[xudo]

tl;dr - Have you ever been literally bored to death, but don't feel like doing anything? Like none of your previous areas of interests appeal to you anymore?

Yes, this happens to me quite a lot.

How would you deal with that?

Honestly? I moan about how bored I am I usually just end up sat watching some crappy TV and sort of zoning out. I may force myself to do something and that can help, as I might find that I get into it once I've started.

 

[Mr Allen]

Yes, this happens to me quite a lot.



Honestly? I moan about how bored I am I usually just end up sat watching some crappy TV and sort of zoning out. I may force myself to do something and that can help, as I might find that I get into it once I've started.

You could play more Xbox, not seen you on there for ages

If you're fed up of the real world, immerse yourself in a virtual one.

 

[xudo]

You could play more Xbox, not seen you on there for ages

If you're fed up of the real world, immerse yourself in a virtual one.

I don't have an Xbox any more.

 

[Beguiling Orbit]

 

[Dorkasour]

tl;dr - Have you ever been literally bored to death, but don't feel like doing anything? Like none of your previous areas of interests appeal to you anymore? How would you deal with that?

Do what NT people do and stare at the ceiling for hours.

 

[Iamnotarabot]

Just to add something, in the beginning of the year i could spend litteraly half my day in my bed and the other half staring at my computer doing nothing...

To get out of this situation ( well im far from ok but realy better atm) , i tried to do the most little thing and easiest task, for me it was to get out and walk near my block, for 20min, for you it could be something else i dont know, but start by doing something little i guess.

 

[Gritches]

I have a similar pattern with my interests. I call it hit-it-and-quit-it.

Almost every therapist who would hear your story would instantly blame it on depression. They might not be wrong, as depression does cause lack of interest (anhedonia) and focus problems.

I'm not even close to the only Aspie that does what you do with interests, though. So I think there's more to it than simply "depression", because that's entirely too easy of an explanation. I find that nothing with autism is just that simple. But the question is, what is it in addition to depression that causes this?

Sorry I don't have any insight, really. Just empathizing. Also, thank you for the tl;dr section. Your post wasn't even close to too long to read, but I think adding a tl;dr is a very good idea for people in general who want to be heard. I understand not everything can be explained in short form, but making an effort to be concise really helps us slow readers who might grimace at the sight of a wall of text that might take someone like me a half hour or more to read. Just throwing that out there.

 

[tducey]

I have had it in the past when I've been working. Usually I enjoy working but on Sunday nights I get the feeling of not wanting to return to work on Monday, haven't felt it as much during this job.

 

[Dan Dan]

My interests are always changing but in a sort of cycle. I love oil painting but after a few months i get bored so then i get out my fishing rods and go fishing. Again I get bored and move on to stone sculpting, then on to reading and on to gardening and so on until i pick up my brushes and start painting again.

 

[Lia]

While I have a few core interests that never change, I also go through different obsessions. Sometimes I go back to interests I've had in the past, and sometimes it's something completely new.
There are times when I find it really hard to start though, even when it comes to my main interest which is art. Some days, drawing seems impossible and I have to force myself. I think this happens to everyone though, but if you lose all interest in doing anything at all (and I'm not just talking about hobbies, but things that need to be done, such as taking care of yourself) then that may be a sign of depression.

 

[Gracey]

Perhaps you could look at whether you need a buzz or a purpose?

If I'm not mistaken, the buzz will come from getting those dopamine pathways open.
Something that will increase your heart rate, thrill and excite, a real feeling of being alive, dynamic, driven.

Or a reason to get out of bed in a morning, washed, dressed and 'up and at 'em'

Are you "bored to death" because you're not getting that buzz from an activity? (Dismissing activities in your mind because you know they won't Grant you that hit)

Or "bored to death" because you don't have something to achieve during your day? A purpose, a function, tasks to complete?

 

[2205]

Just to add something, in the beginning of the year i could spend litteraly half my day in my bed and the other half staring at my computer doing nothing...

To get out of this situation ( well im far from ok but realy better atm) , i tried to do the most little thing and easiest task, for me it was to get out and walk near my block, for 20min, for you it could be something else i dont know, but start by doing something little i guess.

Yeah, I walk too. Some days it's the only activity that I do when I don't have work. But since I also have anxiety issues about going outside, then I mainly walk in the evening when it's dark. I've found it to be "safer".

 

[2205]

I have a similar pattern with my interests. I call it hit-it-and-quit-it.

Almost every therapist who would hear your story would instantly blame it on depression. They might not be wrong, as depression does cause lack of interest (anhedonia) and focus problems.

I'm not even close to the only Aspie that does what you do with interests, though. So I think there's more to it than simply "depression", because that's entirely too easy of an explanation. I find that nothing with autism is just that simple. But the question is, what is it in addition to depression that causes this?

Sorry I don't have any insight, really. Just empathizing. Also, thank you for the tl;dr section. Your post wasn't even close to too long to read, but I think adding a tl;dr is a very good idea for people in general who want to be heard. I understand not everything can be explained in short form, but making an effort to be concise really helps us slow readers who might grimace at the sight of a wall of text that might take someone like me a half hour or more to read. Just throwing that out there.

Thank you! I am currently diagnosed with depression too and taking AD for it and I feel it's working.. it's just that previously my depression has been a little different.. when I'm really depressed I don't have time to be bored, because I'm always either sad or anxious or hopeless and I don't miss any activities. But for some reason, this time, I do miss some activity. I just don't know what it might be. But well.. who knows. Might be mild form of depression.

 

[Dan Dan]

Yeah, I walk too. Some days it's the only activity that I do when I don't have work. But since I also have anxiety issues about going outside, then I mainly walk in the evening when it's dark. I've found it to be "safer".

Walking/hiking is my foremost number one interest. Its more of a passion. I have anxiety issues also and would never go walking where there are other people. I love nature and wildlife and im lucky to live in one of the most beautiful places in England. I can set off with my dog before sunrise and come back at night. I spend a full day getting lost in the countryside. I also suffer from depression and find that this the only way to try and fight it.

 

[2205]

Perhaps you could look at whether you need a buzz or a purpose?

If I'm not mistaken, the buzz will come from getting those dopamine pathways open.
Something that will increase your heart rate, thrill and excite, a real feeling of being alive, dynamic, driven.

Or a reason to get out of bed in a morning, washed, dressed and 'up and at 'em'

Are you "bored to death" because you're not getting that buzz from an activity? (Dismissing activities in your mind because you know they won't Grant you that hit)

Or "bored to death" because you don't have something to achieve during your day? A purpose, a function, tasks to complete?

Thank you! Really interesting point! I suppose I have mostly purpose issue, because when I accidentally find myself in some activity, I do get the buzz. (yesterday I went hiking spontaneously and that was great! enjoyed that very much)

But I feel I don't have any purpose, because I have now settled on a job that supports me and I have relatively stable life (unlike most of my previous life). For example, about 10 years ago I had strong purpose to get up in the mornings to work on my skills to become "the best version of myself" and to "conquer the world" in few years (like most 20-year-olds do I guess). Now all that is gone, because obviously I didn't conquer the world and I just "get by" now. I've accepted mediocrity. And since there is no big purpose, I also dismiss some small activities in my head, because they seem like child's play that don't have any true meaning.

 

[Bolletje]

Maybe this site has some answers for you: Start Here | Puttylike

It's run by a woman who holds the belief that some people are able to, and in fact need to have many different interests, not all of which at the same time. It's all about not feeling guilty for abandoning on interests when you embark on something new. I could copy quotes from her site, but she's a lot better at explaining it than I am

 

[Fridgemagnetman]

I could copy quotes from her site, but she's a lot better at explaining it than I am

Technically she would still be explaining it....

What a great site though. It seems to fit me like a tea cosy for a hat,unquestioned when worn with aplomb.

Explains why I get to a certain point and then just .......

 

[Cinco]

I know how you feel but sadly I don't have an answer
I made a thread about it earlier if you want to read my take on it and some of the answers I got