Is it bad that I don't view my autism as a gift?

[SunnyDay16]

Many people have said how they view their autism as a "gift" and how they would never want to change it. I don't think that way of thinking is bad, but I just don't understand it in my case.

Asperger's has been mostly a giant pain in the ass. It has impacted my ability to socialize and has made me come off like a huge jerk sometimes. It has gotten treated to the point where I can mimic NT pretty well to a point, but at the end of the day I feel exhausted for mimicking. It's also affected how other people treat me. Some people don't treat me any different, but others either treat me like a complete inept baby or are just unsympathetic assholes.

This is mostly just a vent and I'm not saying it's bad to view autism as a gift. Far from it. In fact, I am envious of people who view it as such and are able to not let autism affect them so much. Don't get me wrong, I don't see autism as an illness or a disease that needs curing either, since that is just pseudoscientific jargon that Autism Speaks wants to feed us. But, I certainly don't view it as a gift, because all it's done is make life harder for me.

 

[I don't want have a name!]

No, to be honest with you I feel similar. It's like you can function in society, but not that well as normal people and this "being between" is pain in the ass neck and other things... I think this "gift" propaganda is bad for us, Aspies, cuz we MUST BE EINSTEINS, that's stupid and bring reactions like yours. At the end, I must repeat IT'S PERFECTLY OK. I hope that I answer your question in somewhat understable english, Have a great day!

 

[Gracey]

Not bad at all.
It's completely up to you how you feel about it. It's yours.

I can understand your frustrations though

I've stumbled across autism much later in life. I've spent alot of my years on the peripheral. Never quite getting it right in real time social situations and being suprised at the reaction of others over something I've said.

Didn't stop me trying to fit in though. That in itself kept on wearing me down and I never understood why. Always asking myself "what the hell is wrong with me? because I never seemed to learn by my mistakes. (Socially)
My behaviour, perspective, habits remained constant.
It was frustrating as hell. I was annoyed with myself.

The less effort I made, trying to be just like others, the calmer I felt - or at least less frustrated.
I figured I was onto something there and pursued it.

Comparing yourself to non-asd folk is the equivalent of thinking Superman is the same as Batman
Close, but no coconut.

You are allowed to be frustrated, and rant and rage you know?
It might not change the outcome but maybe you'll feel better afterwards?

 

[hutchie]

Me neither, apart from the hyperfocusing on what I like, martial arts, health and fitness, not doing much of either because of the autism problems, having aspergers is a disorder which is why we get diagnosed, and before that, treated like crap as we're tried by NT'S standards.

Not saying the treated like crap stops, we cant even tell people about it as we're judged again, figure!

I also have Adhd too.

 

[Heron]

#0 Exactly what life do you compare with.
We are all living, right now, in a limited compartment.

 

[Streetwise]

No, to be honest with you I feel similar. It's like you can function in society, but not that well as normal people and this "being between" is pain in the ass neck and other things... I think this "gift" propaganda is bad for us, Aspies, cuz we MUST BE EINSTEINS, that's stupid and bring reactions like yours. At the end, I must repeat IT'S PERFECTLY OK. I hope that I answer your question in somewhat understable english, Have a great day!

What ever your language is you speak English better than I speak yours

 

[xudo]

No, you can feel however you like about your Autism. I view my Asperger's a a positive for the most part (it does have downsides) as I wouldn't be me without it.

 

[Crossbreed]

NT lives have positives and negatives, too. I don't see myself as being worse off than them. My positives and negatives are just distributed differently. Once you map out your strengths, weaknesses and limitations, you can begin to get a better handle on them.

 

[vangelis]

No, you can feel however you like about your Autism. I view my Asperger's a a positive for the most part (it does have downsides) as I wouldn't be me without it.

It scares me to think what I would be like without AS. I have mentioned in another thread how I definitely do not want to be like many NTs I observe.

 

[The Midge]

As Tevye said to God in Fiddler on the Roof:

I know, I know. We are Your chosen people.
But, once in a while, can't You choose someone else?​

It is our 'gift'. We might not have put it on our birthday list. We have to work out how to make the most of it

 

[Streetwise]

As Tevye said to God in Fiddler on the Roof:

I know, I know. We are Your chosen people.
But, once in a while, can't You choose someone else?​

It is our 'gift'. We might not have put it on our birthday list. We have to work out how to make the most of it

I don't think it's a gift we are just different .

 

[ZebraAutismo]

Aspects of my autism are gift such as my logical mind but a lot of it is a curse like my anxiety and social skills issues.

 

[hutchie]

A logical mind on this planet, no wonder I'm easily drained, so many things that are wrong and people know it too, but are ok to let it happen.

 

[Gracey]

It scares me to think what I would be like without AS. I have mentioned in another thread how I definitely do not want to be like many NTs I observe.

I'm quite pleased (on the quiet) I think I may have found my tribe

I'm like "okay everybody, suit up "

 

[Full Steam]

I used to feel cursed a long time ago.

Now I try to find meaning in the struggle.

Fighting, moving forward, finding a way, helping others.

Who knows what we may do in the future, or who may need us?

 

[Lirelan]

I found out I'm an Aspie recently, and now I see all the ways in which it's made my life both hell AND unique. It has good things and bad things. Like, sensory sensitivity is a real pain in my rear, but then I'm hyperlexic and a good writer. I have social anxiety, but I'm a great problem-solver because I keep calm, look at things sideways, and think completely differently from most people I know. It's a real mixed bag.

 

[SusanLR]

It is truly a mix.
Looking back on my life of not knowing about ASD, I can see it caused struggles. Anxiety problems mostly.
The other things that bother some of us didn't bother me.
Social skills (lack of) doesn't bother you if you don't really have the desire for friendships or romantic partnerships.
Being bullied only bothered me for a short time in life.
Mainly around early teens. I gradually blocked it out and became numb to it.
My odd obsessions, and living differently to peers as I grew older was a " So What " attitude as long as it made me happy.

I learned quite well how to act and put on the mask that gave me the edge to climb the professional ladder.
The old line...regrets, I've had a few, but, then again, too few to mention...I did things MY Way rings true.

So I don't see it as a gift or a curse either.
I learned to be happy with my world, not allowing the ways of the world around me to hurt.
The hardest part for me is making peace with myself, inside my own head. And that can be true for anyone.

 

[wight]

I figured out I'm AS later in life, so the stuff that AS brings along are just part of life for me, not good or bad, gift or curse.

We all need to come to terms with, and make peace with, our individual abilities and disabilities if we are to become who we are meant to be. NT or ND is just part of our make up, along with all the other things we "inherit" from our parents, genetic or not. A little philosophical for 4am, I guess.

 

[Alaska]

Many people have said how they view their autism as a "gift" and how they would never want to change it. I don't think that way of thinking is bad, but I just don't understand it in my case.

Asperger's has been mostly a giant pain in the ass. It has impacted my ability to socialize and has made me come off like a huge jerk sometimes. It has gotten treated to the point where I can mimic NT pretty well to a point, but at the end of the day I feel exhausted for mimicking. It's also affected how other people treat me. Some people don't treat me any different, but others either treat me like a complete inept baby or are just unsympathetic assholes.

This is mostly just a vent and I'm not saying it's bad to view autism as a gift. Far from it. In fact, I am envious of people who view it as such and are able to not let autism affect them so much. Don't get me wrong, I don't see autism as an illness or a disease that needs curing either, since that is just pseudoscientific jargon that Autism Speaks wants to feed us. But, I certainly don't view it as a gift, because all it's done is make life harder for me.

No, it is not bad for you not to regard your Aspergers as a gift. It is, however, not nearly as fun for you.

I believe that every single person has a reason for existing, and I think that includes us Aspies and Auties.

I am working on a hypothesis that Aspies and Auties are especially significant to the world and it's future. The thing that made me start looking into this idea was my discovery that it is extremely likely that Moses was an Aspie.

Even if you regard the Bible as fiction, the idea of Moses is still really great as a role model.

It does not seem likely that such a high percentage of us have high IQs paired with ability for intense focus, is an accident. That combination is a tremendous engine for making the world a better place.

 

[Bella Pines]

I am envious of people who view it as such and are able to not let autism affect them so much.

I view autism as a gift, but don't mistake it as a shiny happy place full of smiling Facebook selfies! I am constantly exhausted by having to pretend to be an NT, and live in a state of pissed-off-ness.

It's more like this.

I feel like I live in the zombie apocalypse. Everyone around me is happy to follow the crowd, no one seems to be able to think independently. When I do point about the obvious, it's frowned upon.

So the question I would ask you is, would you be happier being a zombie? Would you volunteer to be bitten and become one of them? Or are you happier being gifted with insight and being apart from the crowd?