Interviews And Laughing

[FayetheAspie]

How do you guarantee getting through an awkward high stress event like a job interview without laughing? The advice about reminding myself why it's important not to laugh or trying to think what the other person will think only makes me laugh harder because it just makes me that much more uncomfortable. People that give advice seem to think it's a matter of not knowing that you shouldn't laugh or just being rude when it's actually a reflex that is hard or even impossible to avoid. I'm doing better than I was when I was still in my retail job, but it still comes up at times like the other day at school when they had us doing interview practice. We had to pair up for the practice and switch out being the one being interviewed and the one conducting the interview. I think I did fairly well when pretending to be being interviewed, but apparently I didn't speak long enough and my eye contact pattern was off. Then when I had to be the one conducting the interview, I started laughing and couldn't ask the questions because I could only manage to get out an occasional word amongst all the involuntary laughter. I felt like a total idiot.

 

[Rodafina]

Sorry you felt like an idiot - I can understand that feeling, too.

We all have to learn to control our anxiety in certain situations. It sounds like one manifestation of anxiety and discomfort for you is laughing. Have you tried basic anxiety management strategies?

- Deep, slow breathing: this can be hard because it sounds so simply and some people get annoyed with the suggestion. But, really, deep slow breathing has a physiological effect on our fight/flight/freeze system and engages our logical brain.

- Grounding: Have something tangible that you can feel to help stay focused during the interview. It can be something like a fidget toy (something discreet for a job interview), putting something noticeable in your shoes, wearing a ring with some texture, or simply focusing on how the chair feels on your back. Sometimes, a tactile reminder can help us stay present and less focused on anxious feelings.

- Eat carefully: Before the interview, make sure that you are not hungry, but also not hyped up on caffeine or sugar. Probably some protein and plenty of water would be best. It is likely okay to have a water bottle during the interview, and taking occasional sips may also help with regulating your emotions.

- Preparation: Write down everything you can before you go into the interview (some may call it journaling). You can start by expressing your worries and discomfort and then write down what you want to convey during the interview. The more organized your mind is going into the stressful event, the less likely you are to be overcome by any anxiety.

- Look ahead: Remember that you don't have to make the anxiety go away altogether - you just have to get through the interview. If you can hold it together for the interview, it's no problem to drive away cackling, screaming, crying, and singing, and letting it all out.

 

[FayetheAspie]

I think anxiety is a major part of it, but also in that example I think trying to act all professional and business like felt so unnatural and silly that it added to it.

 

[FayetheAspie]

Anxiety is a common trigger, but embarrassment, fear, and genuine but exaggerated amusement can all be as well. This is especially true during phases where I am experiencing frequent bursts of elevated mood and the experience can very. Even within a similar situation I will have different laughing triggers. One time I might feel anxiety and start laughing. Another time I might feel embarrassed. Another time something small might strike me as amusing (like a whisp of hair resembling an antenna) but even though it was only mildly funny I can't hardly stop laughing and laughing no matter how much I want to and efforts to stop seem to make it worse. Some times I just get overwhelmed by a random surge of amused feelings that I have no known reason for and it is hard to convince anyone that there doesn't really seem to be anything in particular that I am laughing about. And at other times I will actually be feeling fear or even anger but it comes out as laughter for some reason.

 

[Judge]

I think anxiety is a major part of it, but also in that example I think trying to act all professional and business like felt so unnatural and silly that it added to it.

It's why I sought professional help over social anxiety. Especially given the high stakes of any job interview. Ultimately solved with a pharmaceutical solution by a psychiatrist.

The good news is that you clearly understand how important it is to maintain a proper demeanor in a job interview. Particularly something void of any humor such as forensics. So don't feel disparaged in seeking such professional help, or having solutions involving pharmaceuticals.

From how you have explained your uncontrolled laughter, it may in fact be the only way you can truly address such a thing. Though as is the case of so many here living in America it's no secret how expensive such mental health resources might be. But your future has value. You are worth whatever it costs to be able to rise above such things.

Nuedexta Approved For Uncontrollable Laughing Or Crying (Pseudobulbar Affect)

 

[FayetheAspie]

@Judge I have had a small handful of random crying episodes too, but they are very few. The laughing is definitely more common in my case. Can ASD cause Pseudobulbar Affect?

 

[Judge]

Can ASD cause Pseudobulbar Affect?

It appears that Pseudobulbar Effect does seem to be comorbid to autism for some.

Pseudobulbar Affect in Autism: Causes, Symptoms, and Management Strategies

 

[FayetheAspie]

ADHD ( which I also have) I see listed as a risk factor. I am not diagnosed with an anxiety disorder but I do get anxious frequently and anxiety is a risk factor. Another risk factor on the list is TBI. I have had multiple head injuries, but am not certain if they were severe enough to count as a TBI or not.

 

[tlc]

So hard to find that happy medium. I'm more concerned of not laughing enough. Been seen as cold or stupid or sociopath. Even one of the last engineers who was interviewed at my work, HR turned down them down due to personality. Said they knew their stuff, but answered questions too direct and not flowery. So my coworker (been there almost 30 years and holds nothing back) marched into his office and said "Look, you're dealing with engineers here. You're not gonna get flowery. You're gonna get direct. You hire flowery for sales." If only more companies had an advocate like that.

 

[FayetheAspie]

I typically give direct answers myself. A lot of the flowery talk some people do seems phoney anyway. I talk a lot and rather enthusiastically if a special interest topic comes up. I also talk if I need to ask for information or if I am comfortable enough around an individual to blurt out some of my more random thoughts such as ( Does the texture of the ceiling every remind you of cottage cheese?). When I was little, I would have blurted out a lot of the more random ones to anyone. Apart from such situations I am typically quiet around others.

 

[FayetheAspie]

One of the less common times (where I was randomly crying rather than laughing) really caused a problem at work once. I had decided to start trying to open up more and had talked while I worked with a coworker who was male but who I had absolutely no interest in. Later another girl worked with us and was flirting with him. I couldn't have cared less and felt no sadness yet tears started streaming down my face for whatever reason. She got a high off of it and thought she had hurt me by flirting at him. Soon it seemed to be all over the store. I was humiliated and didn't know how to respond (likely due to theory of mind issues in ASD). I started to avoid him hoping people would catch on that I wasn't interested in him. The rumors just kept getting worse and worse for a while.

 

[FayetheAspie]

Things like trips to the eye doctor have gotten a bit chaotic due to this since I was around probably about 8 or so. They have typically went something like this.

Me - sits down in chair in the eye exam room
Eye doctor - starts to set up equipment in front of my face
Me - uncomfortable about someone being that close to my face
Doctor - " What's funny?"
Me - "nothing"
Doctor - "Something sure is."
Me - wonders why I am laughing myself and is now afraid I'll be in trouble if I can't find a reason, glaces around still laughing to find a reason why a person might laugh "That thinglooks like big bug eyes
Doctor - "I guess they could, but you need to calm it down now"
Me -
Doctor -

As a child, they found it odd but typically tolerated the strange child. As an adult people loose patience with me faster it seems. I'm weird, what can I say.