Infantilization

[Ylva]

I suspect we've all been subjected to it. It seems benign to onlookers, so they're not gonna interfere.

 

[Aspychata]

This was so nicely explained. I am extremely independent but l do find this being used on me by men who are trying to take advantage of older woman. This is defintely used on a lot of people.

 

[Lymle]

My parents used to do this to me to some degree until I got old enough to recognize it, then I had the "meltdown"
of meltdowns & pointed it out.

I was expecting a lot of yelling so I worked myself up & got ready for it but it never came.
Turns out they weren't doing it on purpose afterall, & from then on they became more aware, & now things are more like they should be.

Maybe the "meltdown" part wasn't such a great idea to prove my point without proving there's first, but I'd had enough!
& it got the job done. Lol

I know they really love me & I really love them, but sometimes you just need to give a little nudge to correct the course.

 

[Aspychata]

The one thing l learned about family dynamics is we become emeshed in the patterns. So your parents become emeshed in treating you the same nonsical way, you becomes emeshed in responding with anger/rebellion etc. It's only sad when drug or alcohol abuse follows because the parents clearly will not change how they treat you. Then you have to watch out that you don't chose your life partner based on this comfortable emeshed patterns because you have a lifetime of repetition of this. I suffered some emotional neglect, and sadly the person l married felt cold and l didn't catch it. Now my feelers are in tune and l check how people respond carefully to situtation because we need to stay honest with our dealings involving us.

 

[SDRSpark]

The one thing l learned about family dynamics is we become emeshed in the patterns. So your parents become emeshed in treating you the same nonsical way, you becomes emeshed in responding with anger/rebellion etc. It's only sad when drug or alcohol abuse follows because the parents clearly will not change how they treat you. Then you have to watch out that you don't chose your life partner based on this comfortable emeshed patterns because you have a lifetime of repetition of this. I suffered some emotional neglect, and sadly the person l married felt cold and l didn't catch it. Now my feelers are in tune and l check how people respond carefully to situtation because we need to stay honest with our dealings involving us.

This is something I've been thinking about a lot lately for various reasons - you hit the nail on the head with this one.

I've seen these patterns in myself quite a bit.

 

[christopher.k]

generally, I try to give the benefit of the doubt to parents considering how huge and constant the role of parenthood is even when said child relays on their wavelength
but then I've been lucky enough to have a brilliant single mother so improbably biased
though with that said mental dependency on parents is a problem I see a lot of on this island

 

[Aspychata]

generally, I try to give the benefit of the doubt to parents considering how huge and constant the role of parenthood is even when said child relays on their wavelength
but then I've been lucky enough to have a brilliant single mother so improbably biased
though with that said mental dependency on parents is a problem I see a lot of on this island

Strong parental support is so important, but when one or both parents are on the spectrum, your upbringing can resemble isolation and emotional neglect due to autistic behaviors of parents. There was some physical violence present in my particular case.