Imitating and communicating

[Amethyst]

I'm wondering if anyone does this, and this question is probably more directed at people who deal with the public frequently. I don't exactly mean do you imitate people, I mean in social situations do you find yourself trying to figure out when it's your time to respond and what you should say and then misunderstand and, I guess, screw up social ques and your response might be in the same volume that they were talking in or laughing when their laugh is a nervous one.
I work as a receptionist, it absolute hell but I lack education and don't have a lot of job options, need money, etc. Trying to find something different. Anyway, I find I miss when it's my turn to talk or I think I genuinely know when it's my turn to talk and then I say something that puts someone off, and not until things have quieted down do I figure out what happened. I find sometimes if I'm overwhelmed my words and tone will echo in my head and I lose track of the entire conversation. I think the only reason I can actually do my job is because I have a script and a set way of dealing with people and phone calls, and so long as that is not interrupted I do okay.

Anyway, I was just wondering if I'm alone in this?
Thanks

 

[AsheSkyler]

Ohhhh yeah. I just want to put a little traffic light in their mouth that will tell me when it's okay for me to stop or go. Knowing my luck, it'll still be stuck in yellow/Yield. I enjoy my times as a receptionist, but phone calls are a pain in the butt. I can't read their body language to see if they're about to say something.

 

[Cali Cat]

I hated receptionist work more than anything. Every new call was another exercise in figuring out how and when to respond. Speaking on the phone in general is difficult for me. If I'm already nervous, which I am when I talk to strangers, I have a really hard time understanding them sometimes, especially if they have any kind of accent. I'd sort of mimic whatever tone and verbal atmosphere the caller was creating to sort of "get in their heads" to understand them better, but I couldn't do that with accents because it would sound like I was mocking them. I had to do it internally, which took longer. It's also hard for me to take messages properly. People tend to speak quickly and shoot off phone numbers like bullets. I always thought I was a dumb as a stump because I had these difficulties, because at the time I was working as a receptionist, I didn't know I had AS.

Social situations are the same. I can be in a group of people and never know when I should attempt to add my two-cents worth. One-on-one is usually different, because when the other person stops speaking and looks at me, I figure that means it's time for me to talk. I just don't always know what to say or perhaps how to respond with the correct tone in my voice and expression on my face.

 

[Kari Suttle]

I work as a cashier so misunderstandings happen all the time for me. I tend to follow a script for pretty much every customer that comes through my line. But for friendly, talkative/outgoing customers I never know what to do. My script already thrown out the window i don't know how to respond or what to say or when and on the times i think i got it i rarely do and they end up put off and i have no idea why. Its hell but its my only legitimate job and i don't know that with my bad social skills i'd be able to get another job. Plus i'm already used to all of the people there and how to act with them and so on and so forth, i'm adjusted to it. And even if its not ideal it could be a hell of a lot worse.

 

[Harrison]

I work with the public and as it is a stressful time for them I have a lot of scripts. Sometimes though they go off piste and I flounder for something to say. Not so bad if it's a short journey, but if I have them for four hours it can get 'interesting'.

 

[Spiller]

Definitely scripting! I ran my own business for 15 years and rarely had an easy conversation when I knew what the customer always meant and what my reply should be. Every day just seemed so random.. sooo much stress. I can't use phones at all now - used to get by years ago, but the anxiety just got too much.

 

[Amethyst]

Thanks so much for your input everyone
I do okay with the phones at work, but it's because I know what to say and how to guide the conversation. Anything outside of that, unless I'm taking to my mom or husband, I have major anxiety.

 

[Judge]

I tend to follow a script for pretty much every customer that comes through my line. But for friendly, talkative/outgoing customers I never know what to do.

For me it used to be those friendly, talkative cashiers that would leave me confused as to what to say to them. Though these days they are the people I'm most likely to speak with on a regular basis. Just a few quick words, but I don't give it much thought. Not the terror or confusion it once was long ago. Going to work in a large office helped with a lot of that over time...although it wasn't an easy transition at first.

Now the ones who challenge me are those Direct TV people lurking about in Best Buy stores. They pop out of nowhere and try to start conversations out of the blue! I usually tell them my reality of living facing due north, so they leave me alone.

 

[wyverary]

I work as a cashier. One thing I've learned..."Nod and smile!" The upside is every now and then a customer will actually have interesting things to say, and I, being curious by nature, am happy to probe the person in the hopes of learning something or connect in some way. But most of the time, Yes, I follow a script...and if I'm having an "off" day, I have difficulty saying anything besides the usual "Hi, how are you today?" and "Would you like me to bag those for you?" I think I've gotten pretty good at imitation, though, oddly enough. I can often bring myself to adjust to the person's way of thinking, the way they talk...but I think it's largely experience that has taught me that, and it can be oh so draining!