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Oliver Greensmith

Awaiting Diagnosis
I am 13 years old and live in a nice loving family of 5 : my mum, my dad, my older brother (14years old), my younger brother (10years old) , my cat and my dog.

I have always found that i find it hard to make friends and just be the normal kid who talks to his friends at school. I have my one main friend since year 1, but at school i always find myself sitting out of group activities and wanting to do everything on my own. And i also find that i strive in certain subjects maths and computer science.

But in subjects like English science i have always been told to look at the big picture but I never understand what they mean, i always find myself looking at the little details and then my brain gets overloaded and starts to hurt, but the next day i remember peoples conversations, algorithms and i find that i am addicted to computer programming.

And i was in school today and someone said that there brother has similar problems to you and he has ASD. And when i was walking home from school today i was thinking of programming while taking in all the information around me etc: car number-plates, door numbers people bag brands and i i think too much was sent to my brain that my vision went blurry and everything looked a bit creepy.

And so I started to chew my finger nails (and i feel that when i am in situations that frighten me or make me anxious i chew my finger nails and it makes me feel more relaxed ) and thought i am going to look up about ASD, and so i did and i found that a-lot of these symptoms that i am having are symptoms of ASD.

But i want to tell my Mum and Dad about it but i feel that it will be too awkward and I don’t know how they will react...

So what should i do ?
You said you have a nice, loving family, so I think you should talk to them about it. Sure, it'll be awkward, and of course you don't know how they'll react because that would be creepy if you somehow knew that, but what else can you do?

You can talk to a school counselor/psychologist/teacher if you'd feel more comfortable with one of them.

Other than those things, I can't think of anything else than to do nothing which is also a fine option if you're happy and content, but since you're here asking I suspect that isn't exactly the case.
Hi Oliver :) Welcome to this forum. The people here are very nice and supportive and helpful, not judgmental so I think you will find a lot of information and get a lot of support here.

Why don't you write down the ways in which you feel you share characteristics with people on the spectrum. That will give you a starting point and framework with which to discuss your concerns with your parents. You could also write a list of things which pose difficulties for you like feeling uncomfortable participating in a group activity , or feeling like too much information is flooding your brain at one time. Tell them you'd like to get help with these things. Hope you will keep in touch with us and let us know how you make out.
I would go over some of the traits with them and point out that it is not a negative thing, then let them know that you feel you share these traits.
Remember that most people really have little education and knowledge about autism/aspergers. Sounds like you have some good, understanding parents to talk to.
You can take multiple online tests and show them the results if you think that might help.
You also could find online articles and YouTube videos that explain autism to show them, and also find examples of things you do that fit the criteria that they can easily recognise in you.
I read the part about programming, license plates, etc. and briefly wondered if I had written it. (This morning, I almost walked past my car in the store parking lot. I stopped because I recognized the license plate).

Yes, try some online tests as others here have recommended. Also, it sounds like your family will be accepting and supportive - you are very blessed.

I get the English vs Programming thing. I think they're polar opposite activities. In programming, you write the smallest details (the lowest level functions) first. Then you build up to higher-level functions and eventually to the main program. In reading and writing, you start with the high-level storyline, and break it down into chapters, individual actions, etc.
I think I am autistic but I am scared of telling my mum or dad because I am worried that they will not believe me and will just dismiss the question?
I have thought about telling them in a non-verbal way or speaking to my teacher at school I am 13 so I don't know how they will react!

What should I do?

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