Great .Now you're calling him mental
If you're in a hole stop digging
I know where you're coming from, he's just reading you wrong.
But I can also see how it can be mis-read,hope you can too
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I don't think I can live anymore
- Thread starter lostinlife
- Start date
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Great .Now you're calling him mental
If you're in a hole stop digging
I know where you're coming from, he's just reading you wrong.
But I can also see how it can be mis-read,hope you can too
Great .Now you're calling him mental
If you're in a hole stop digging
I know where you're coming from, he's just reading you wrong.
But I can also see how it can be mis-read,hope you can too
I see how the word "delusional" could be taken as offensive, but I didn't see how the last post could be misread.
But being "mental" and being "mentally ill" are different, aren't they? "Mental" is a colloquial term for various things?
Is it in question whether or not he's mentally ill? Isn't everyone suicidal considered mentally ill? Is it insulting to say someone is mentally ill? I'm mentally ill, otherwise it'd be odd for me to be taking about 20 pills a day.
But if these things are offensive in some way, then I'll listen to you and stop digging after I'm done with the current hole.
(trigger, I said hole: BLOWHOLE)
For me it was just normal.
That's what I'm trying to convey.
Imagine thinking of it in that way.
A lot of it can be the fear of not being able to 'control' your own thoughts or being forced to act on them.
Anyway, I think you can gelo the guy by talking about how hopeless you are...
Translation : by showing you've been through it and how you found your way through
Let's see now - you are studying at university, so living in a third world country, your father has probably financed this. Although he is not a nice person by your account, you have somewhere to spend your time, and can put yourself wholly into your studies so you do well. You don't even have to work like a lot of other students to get by - your father is keeping you.
And this father is a property owner and is not too grand health wise, and apparently the properties come down to you.
There are things lined up in the furture that will already change things drastically for you, more than for a lot of young people. You seem to have reasonable health - or rather you have not added that to your complaints.
Your biggest problems are concerning envy and wanting revenge. These are spiritual problems. You need work on your personality and there is help out here, if not where you live, online for you to evolve and become grateful for what you have.
And this father is a property owner and is not too grand health wise, and apparently the properties come down to you.
There are things lined up in the furture that will already change things drastically for you, more than for a lot of young people. You seem to have reasonable health - or rather you have not added that to your complaints.
Your biggest problems are concerning envy and wanting revenge. These are spiritual problems. You need work on your personality and there is help out here, if not where you live, online for you to evolve and become grateful for what you have.
DuckRabbit
Well-Known Member
In his books 'Dark Nights of the Soul' and 'Care of the Soul', Thomas Moore shows a good understanding of what it is to feel abnormal, strange, isolated and outcast e.g.,
I ADORE Jordan Peterson and Thomas Moore
In Dark Nights of the Soul (2004), he writes about cultivating an attitude of 'creative avoidance' (p. 104-107):
Brian Keenan, the Irish writer held captive in Beirut, was thoroughly ironical in relation to his captors. They had complete physical control over him. They deprived him of all basic human requirements and beat him regularly; yet, he never let them have the moral advantage. Reflecting on their brutality, he writes, “The more I was beaten the stronger I seemed to become.... To take what violence they meted out to me and stand and resist and not allow myself to be humiliated. In that resistance I would humiliate them.” Of his friend and companion hostage he said, “I had seen John McCarthy turn from someone who was frightened, as we all were, into someone who was unafraid and totally committed to life.” The shift from fear to vitality is a movement from literal collapse into the situation to getting a different, positive perspective on it.
These strong-hearted men teach us how to deal with oppression and ignorance. You can’t always beat your persecutors at their own game, but you can turn the tables on them morally. Literally you may be an out-and-out victim, without recourse. But in character you can turn everything upside down, making every small aspect of your dark night ironical. You can turn humiliation into courage, and fear into a love of whatever life is left to you.
Brian Keenan’s remarkable story teaches how not to catch the fever of the enemy. He used his wits constantly in an effort to avoid becoming who they wanted him to be. The same is true in all dark nights. There is always the temptation to take it all too literally and one-dimensionally, and become a mere victim. The loss of power through superficial victimisation calls for a witty, ironical response. You can refuse to play victim, no matter how thick the layer of coercion that lies upon you.
One problem in much abuse is the tendency of one who is hurt or oppressed to imagine himself as victim. I’m not saying that victims are responsible for the situation, but that they don’t have to take oppression on its own terms. You can refuse to assume the role and, instead, find strength in yourself, no matter how private and internal, to keep from collapsing into victimhood. The problem is that by entering the field of victim you may constellate in others the role of aggressor. Life is full of such dramas and characters, and to a large extent they are unconscious. Brian Keenan’s captors tried hard to play the roles of jailkeeper and oppressor, but throughout his captivity he was able to keep that balance imperfect, and through his various taunts and tricks prevent them from acting out smoothly and completely what they wanted.
In the most ordinary situations people want to bind you and give you orders, and often this attitude is entirely unconscious and on the surface kind. [...]
Whatever the nature of your dark night, you might consider that basic principle about not being naive in your response to it. Simply to play victim is to cave in to fear and make all the mistakes associated with literal-mindedness. You can always bring wit your situations, actively reframing what is going on and how you are feeling. Emotions need not be taken on their own terms. The sharpness of your imagination can affect how you feel. You can always inquire into the origin of your fears and dread. You can ask yourself just what it is that bothers you, refusing to accept your situation exactly as it is presented. Irony promotes complexity, and it is simple-mindedness that usually gets us in trouble.
I have counselled men and women who were deeply disturbed and yet quite capable of seeing the irony in their situation. Maybe the disturbed are more likely to think more creatively than those blandly caught up in the thought-patterns of their families and the culture at large.
Sometimes your small victories are symbolic. Keenan tells a story from prison of making a candle out of pieces of wax and a string fashioned from clothing fibres. He begins the story by remarking, “There is always something in us that will not submit.” He and his colleague had been forced to spend hours every day in darkness, but that candle was a small, symbolic resistance. He concludes, “Quietly, calmly a sense of victory welled up in me and I thought to myself without saying it, ‘They haven’t beat us yet. We can blot out even their darkness.’”
p. 108 You have to make your own world, instead of succumbing to the one that presses on you. You have to turn the tables on what appears to be fate or the full weight of society. Against great odds, you have to keep your wits about you and refuse to surrender to anyone or anything less than divine. You have to be faithful to the mystery taking place in your heart, rather than to any idea or system that would try, with the best of motives, to disempower you and make you theirs.
I ADORE Jordan Peterson and Thomas Moore
In Dark Nights of the Soul (2004), he writes about cultivating an attitude of 'creative avoidance' (p. 104-107):
Brian Keenan, the Irish writer held captive in Beirut, was thoroughly ironical in relation to his captors. They had complete physical control over him. They deprived him of all basic human requirements and beat him regularly; yet, he never let them have the moral advantage. Reflecting on their brutality, he writes, “The more I was beaten the stronger I seemed to become.... To take what violence they meted out to me and stand and resist and not allow myself to be humiliated. In that resistance I would humiliate them.” Of his friend and companion hostage he said, “I had seen John McCarthy turn from someone who was frightened, as we all were, into someone who was unafraid and totally committed to life.” The shift from fear to vitality is a movement from literal collapse into the situation to getting a different, positive perspective on it.
These strong-hearted men teach us how to deal with oppression and ignorance. You can’t always beat your persecutors at their own game, but you can turn the tables on them morally. Literally you may be an out-and-out victim, without recourse. But in character you can turn everything upside down, making every small aspect of your dark night ironical. You can turn humiliation into courage, and fear into a love of whatever life is left to you.
Brian Keenan’s remarkable story teaches how not to catch the fever of the enemy. He used his wits constantly in an effort to avoid becoming who they wanted him to be. The same is true in all dark nights. There is always the temptation to take it all too literally and one-dimensionally, and become a mere victim. The loss of power through superficial victimisation calls for a witty, ironical response. You can refuse to play victim, no matter how thick the layer of coercion that lies upon you.
One problem in much abuse is the tendency of one who is hurt or oppressed to imagine himself as victim. I’m not saying that victims are responsible for the situation, but that they don’t have to take oppression on its own terms. You can refuse to assume the role and, instead, find strength in yourself, no matter how private and internal, to keep from collapsing into victimhood. The problem is that by entering the field of victim you may constellate in others the role of aggressor. Life is full of such dramas and characters, and to a large extent they are unconscious. Brian Keenan’s captors tried hard to play the roles of jailkeeper and oppressor, but throughout his captivity he was able to keep that balance imperfect, and through his various taunts and tricks prevent them from acting out smoothly and completely what they wanted.
In the most ordinary situations people want to bind you and give you orders, and often this attitude is entirely unconscious and on the surface kind. [...]
Whatever the nature of your dark night, you might consider that basic principle about not being naive in your response to it. Simply to play victim is to cave in to fear and make all the mistakes associated with literal-mindedness. You can always bring wit your situations, actively reframing what is going on and how you are feeling. Emotions need not be taken on their own terms. The sharpness of your imagination can affect how you feel. You can always inquire into the origin of your fears and dread. You can ask yourself just what it is that bothers you, refusing to accept your situation exactly as it is presented. Irony promotes complexity, and it is simple-mindedness that usually gets us in trouble.
I have counselled men and women who were deeply disturbed and yet quite capable of seeing the irony in their situation. Maybe the disturbed are more likely to think more creatively than those blandly caught up in the thought-patterns of their families and the culture at large.
Sometimes your small victories are symbolic. Keenan tells a story from prison of making a candle out of pieces of wax and a string fashioned from clothing fibres. He begins the story by remarking, “There is always something in us that will not submit.” He and his colleague had been forced to spend hours every day in darkness, but that candle was a small, symbolic resistance. He concludes, “Quietly, calmly a sense of victory welled up in me and I thought to myself without saying it, ‘They haven’t beat us yet. We can blot out even their darkness.’”
p. 108 You have to make your own world, instead of succumbing to the one that presses on you. You have to turn the tables on what appears to be fate or the full weight of society. Against great odds, you have to keep your wits about you and refuse to surrender to anyone or anything less than divine. You have to be faithful to the mystery taking place in your heart, rather than to any idea or system that would try, with the best of motives, to disempower you and make you theirs.
lostinlife
Active Member
bro you have your own views and I have mine. A person makes has different views about life and people depending on what kind of life they lived. Perhaps you lived a life where you experienced kindness and help and it made you have the belief that this world is a good place and people are wonderful. If you were in my shoes and experienced what I have been through you would have different views I guarantee that.
I don't know where you live but in this 3rd world country where I was born, staying at a hospital isn't free. I already said in my post that I am dirt poor and my father doesn't care about my well-being. Even if I want I can't go to a hospital.
I can't change your views because it's not my job. And even if it was, a person's views only change if they experience something that alters their previous beliefs.
I don't need to make up anything, judging the tone you used in your writing it's obvious that you didn't experience suffering like I did. If you did you would speak with sympathy.
Yes I know the meaning of the word 'delusion', thank you but it looks like like you yourself don't know where to apply that word.
I can't read enough because of my ptsd but I have read enough to defend myself against people like you.
I am done with this. In fact I am done with everything. Everywhere I go I have to get bullied. Great.
There are friendlier posts in response to your thread.
Think about why you needed to respond to this one.
As an aspie - tone doesn't always come across too well.
He was trying to help - failed.
We all do.
Hitting back is fine too - but you realise you're diminishing his pain,his problems, while you're doing it.
They are as legitimate as your own .
Everybody's is
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