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Helloooooo

Thomas Yeow

New Member
Hello everyone, I'm a 20 y/o Malaysian/Polish mongrel, currently residing in Poland. I first self-diagnosed myself with Aspergers at about 15 years of age, though as someone who spends a lot of time reflecting on the natural biases in my own and human thought in general, I've always had doubts as to whether or not that diagnosis was correct(I might've been using it to, for example, exonerate myself of my failures, or just assuage my need to feel unique).

From primary school up to now, my social situation has managed to replicate itself across 3 different schools, and 2 very different countries, and I'm wondering if fellow male aspies can relate: In a fresh environment, I'd start out by being completely asocial, using my best impression of friendly behaviour when approached by someone. Over time, if there's a social reject in the class, I'd get very close to him, usually by his initiative, and if there're any more such rejects in the space, they'd gravitate towards us and form a group of rejects who'd have fun times together. I've never felt a total sense of commonality or kinship between any of my friends, though, even the one individual with which I'm closest at the time, and I'm very often extremely frustrated with him especially. Recently I even elected to isolate myself entirely from my current group of friends, telling them that I don't want to meet because of our incompatible personalities, leaving me friendless for the summer, which is why I joined this site.

I've always found some aspects of my social needs better satisfied in the writing and videos of people like Richard Dawkins(my first love, so to speak, with "The God Delusion" at the age of 13), Sam Harris, Nick Bostrom, Max Tegmark etc., and I deeply long for companionship with a similar person. This might sound pretentious, and it may very well be, as I suspect I'm a rather arrogant guy, but it is the truest expression of my social desires I've ever made.

As for romantic life, I've forced myself to initiate contact with girls I was interested in a few times in my life, and luckily enough, initially received positive feedback every time(which is only ~4 times, mind you). After getting to know each other better, however, its always been the case that either I find her too neurotypical and lose interest, or she discerns some flaw in me(still looking for the culprit) and leaves. Not my biggest concern, in any case. I'm fairly confident someone great will come up sooner or later.

In other news, I'm nominally interested in programming, and am currently mustering up the willpower to finally finish and publish a small video game.

Excited to hear from anyone with experiences that mirror mine, or someone with expertise and opinions on my diagnosis!
 
upload_2020-7-18_16-30-56.png
 
Welcome to Auticmforums.com, Thomas.

Based on your post it sounds to me that you have a solid grasp of yourself. You are fortunate to have this depth of insight at such a young age.

We are glad you are here.
 
Welcome to the forums. To answer your question that I missed in the chatroom, I'm still searching for ground control. Haha
 
Hi and welcome. Being a person with Aspergers isn't unique around here, of course, you'll likely meet a few others. I hope you enjoy it here.

:snowboarder::airplane::rocket::walking::surfer::swimmer::bicyclist::rowboat::runner:
 
Hello everyone, I'm a 20 y/o Malaysian/Polish mongrel, currently residing in Poland. I first self-diagnosed myself with Aspergers at about 15 years of age, though as someone who spends a lot of time reflecting on the natural biases in my own and human thought in general, I've always had doubts as to whether or not that diagnosis was correct(I might've been using it to, for example, exonerate myself of my failures, or just assuage my need to feel unique).

From primary school up to now, my social situation has managed to replicate itself across 3 different schools, and 2 very different countries, and I'm wondering if fellow male aspies can relate: In a fresh environment, I'd start out by being completely asocial, using my best impression of friendly behaviour when approached by someone. Over time, if there's a social reject in the class, I'd get very close to him, usually by his initiative, and if there're any more such rejects in the space, they'd gravitate towards us and form a group of rejects who'd have fun times together. I've never felt a total sense of commonality or kinship between any of my friends, though, even the one individual with which I'm closest at the time, and I'm very often extremely frustrated with him especially. Recently I even elected to isolate myself entirely from my current group of friends, telling them that I don't want to meet because of our incompatible personalities, leaving me friendless for the summer, which is why I joined this site.

I've always found some aspects of my social needs better satisfied in the writing and videos of people like Richard Dawkins(my first love, so to speak, with "The God Delusion" at the age of 13), Sam Harris, Nick Bostrom, Max Tegmark etc., and I deeply long for companionship with a similar person. This might sound pretentious, and it may very well be, as I suspect I'm a rather arrogant guy, but it is the truest expression of my social desires I've ever made.

As for romantic life, I've forced myself to initiate contact with girls I was interested in a few times in my life, and luckily enough, initially received positive feedback every time(which is only ~4 times, mind you). After getting to know each other better, however, its always been the case that either I find her too neurotypical and lose interest, or she discerns some flaw in me(still looking for the culprit) and leaves. Not my biggest concern, in any case. I'm fairly confident someone great will come up sooner or later.

In other news, I'm nominally interested in programming, and am currently mustering up the willpower to finally finish and publish a small video game.

Excited to hear from anyone with experiences that mirror mine, or someone with expertise and opinions on my diagnosis!
Welcome to wrongplanet
 
Aw there's a notorious seeming autism support forum of that name. Welcome here anyway, hellooo yourself.
 
Go there. Have a looky. Don't think pieplup was having a dig at you, rather the site.
 
Go there. Have a looky. Don't think pieplup was having a dig at you, rather the site.
I doubt that I'll get it just by glancing at the site, its a big site, and I don't know what I'm looking for. Surely if you understood his joke you'd know what specific trait of the site he was referring to. And I just can't see any way in which his statement could've been a dig at the site, something which a little context might change.
In the spirit of maturity I'll iron this out till its flat and out in the open.
 
Welcome Thomas Yeow.

I've never even looked at Wrong Planet, but, I've never seen that as part of a welcome to the forums
here either.

I like your references to the type of philosophical ideals the books and people you mentioned.
Subjects of interest to me also.
 
I like your references to the type of philosophical ideals the books and people you mentioned.
Subjects of interest to me also.
Have you also had problems finding fulfilling relationships in that regard? If so, do you have any suggestions on how I could rectify that? I've lost some friends and chased off a few ladies with my overeagerness to make conversations in this vein happen, so much so that I'm currently completely socially isolated, and I consider this my biggest aspergers-related problem currently.
 
I have several people that are very interested in this type of philosophical study and conversations on the matter.
Just out of coincidence really.
A dentist that shattered his hand in an accident and couldn't practice anymore.
He moved to Tibet and became a real life Dr. Strange, last I knew.

Two chiropractors I've known for a long time.

A young man on a now defunk forum. We've stayed in contact for 10 yrs. now.
A few others just by circumstances.
I was the assistant to a Kung Fu/Tai Chi master who also held classes on energy work and the
light bodies. I have an associates degree in metaphysical arts.

It wasn't I that would start conversations on these various subjects. They did.
As if they knew they could talk about this type of philosophy with me.

I'm almost completely socially isolated, but, do have two people who still study and converse
with me in this area.
If this is a special interest, as it is with me, there are places that you can join in studies and discussions
with and groups like a Socrates Cafe. Just have to look around and search online.
I'm just not currently socialising in RL except with two people so I am content.
But, I just don't bring the subjects up to others first.
 
I have several people that are very interested in this type of philosophical study and conversations on the matter.
Just out of coincidence really.
A dentist that shattered his hand in an accident and couldn't practice anymore.
He moved to Tibet and became a real life Dr. Strange, last I knew.

Two chiropractors I've known for a long time.

A young man on a now defunk forum. We've stayed in contact for 10 yrs. now.
A few others just by circumstances.
I was the assistant to a Kung Fu/Tai Chi master who also held classes on energy work and the
light bodies. I have an associates degree in metaphysical arts.

It wasn't I that would start conversations on these various subjects. They did.
As if they knew they could talk about this type of philosophy with me.

I'm almost completely socially isolated, but, do have two people who still study and converse
with me in this area.
If this is a special interest, as it is with me, there are places that you can join in studies and discussions
with and groups like a Socrates Cafe. Just have to look around and search online.
I'm just not currently socialising in RL except with two people so I am content.
But, I just don't bring the subjects up to others first.
Hah that dentist story is pretty remarkable. Thank you so much for sharing.
 

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