Hello, New Here

[ariinya]

My name is Tracy, and I'm 35-years-old. I was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome at the age of 22. For years and years, my mom was my main support system; however, she died when I was 27, and ever since then, it's been me and my dad. He tried so very, very hard to understand me. Every time I had a panic attack, he tried to be supportive.

There were things about me that he just couldn't wrap his head around. As much as I try to understand how to do certain chores, the details just slithered out of my mind like water through a sieve. It also doesn't help that I have physical disabilities as well — I have neuropathy in my legs, which required me to get a Spinal Cord Stimulator implanted in my back. Also, I have fibromyalgia and recurring migraines that cause seizures (I pass out for short periods of time).

My dad tried hard, though. However, on February 14, 2020, he passed away, leaving me entirely alone for the first time in my life. I still have my aunt and uncle, but I'm not by myself. It's absolutely terrifying. I miss my dad so terribly, and I'm afraid every day about what's going to happen to me (as absolutely selfish as that is).

I'm really not very good at anything besides English. I do some proofreading on fanfiction for fun, as well as to pass the time. I think I'd go crazy if I had absolutely nothing to do. So, on that note... it's nice to meet all of you! Sorry for the long tale. ^^;

 

[unperson]

So sorry for your losses, and so recently too. Nice to have you with us.

 

[Giraffes]

Welcome Arlinya i hope joining here gives you support and connection with this community, i also am good at English, i love words and meanings, do you enjoy reading books/poems?

 

[ariinya]

Welcome Arlinya i hope joining here gives you support and connection with this community, i also am good at English, i love words and meanings, do you enjoy reading books/poems?

I love books, especially fantasy books, and a little bit of science fiction.

 

[Sarah S]

Im so terribly sorry for youre losses ( like you i had my mom as support and sadly since i think now since 8 years i had to accept the fact that she is gone from my life (NO not dead but Alzimers ) so she is in a GOOD home and being WELL looked after but she is sadly also gone from my life .But for me i found a GREAT dear friend that i actually helped a LOONG time ago when he was VERY low and in danger of going under & he is now pretty much my life support same as my mom was for which im EVER so greatful.

NOTHING of that is selfich dear.

Im more then shore that youre very good at allot of things . BUT youre self contience is at the down low so to say (been there )

Anyway WARM welcome the forum

 

[ariinya]

Im so terribly sorry for youre losses ( like you i had my mom as support and sadly since i think now since 8 years i had to accept the fact that she is gone from my life (NO not dead but Alzimers ) so she is in a GOOD home and being WELL looked after but she is sadly also gone from my life .But for me i found a GREAT dear friend that i actually helped a LOONG time ago when he was VERY low and in danger of going under & he is now pretty much my life support same as my mom was for which im EVER so greatful.

NOTHING of that is selfich dear.

Im more then shore that youre very good at allot of things . BUT youre self contience is at the down low so to say (been there )

Anyway WARM welcome the forum

I'm sorry to hear about your mom. I'm glad to hear she's in a good place, and I'm also glad you found a friend, and that you're helping one another. ^_^

Thank you for the warm welcome! <3

 

[tree]

 

[clg114]

Welcome to Autism Forums!

 

[SusanLR]

Welcome to the forums!

It took losing my parents and leaving me with no home or family to find out I have Asperger's.
I also had frequent panic attacks that I knew no one else would understand.
Physical problems too, the neuropathy in my feet, fibromyalgia and a degenerating spine.

The loss was more than I could handle, so I had counciling which lead to suggestion of ASD
and testing. I had never even heard of it, but, it all fit when I found out.
I had to move into a house where I could afford the rent on SSI.
An older man I knew that had a big house and wanted someone to live with him
like a caretaker, rented two rooms and bath with kitchen privileges to me.
Believe me, I was so afraid I couldn't keep my panic attacks and anxiety from showing.
What a feeling of being alone when I never had been before in my life.

Do you live alone or with your aunt?
Finding this forum after diagnosis has been very good for me.
Hope you find it helps also. I think you will.

 

[Alexej]

Hi and welcome to the Forums

 

[Len Huppe]

My name is Tracy, and I'm 35-years-old. I was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome at the age of 22. For years and years, my mom was my main support system; however, she died when I was 27, and ever since then, it's been me and my dad. He tried so very, very hard to understand me. Every time I had a panic attack, he tried to be supportive.

There were things about me that he just couldn't wrap his head around. As much as I try to understand how to do certain chores, the details just slithered out of my mind like water through a sieve. It also doesn't help that I have physical disabilities as well — I have neuropathy in my legs, which required me to get a Spinal Cord Stimulator implanted in my back. Also, I have fibromyalgia and recurring migraines that cause seizures (I pass out for short periods of time).

My dad tried hard, though. However, on February 14, 2020, he passed away, leaving me entirely alone for the first time in my life. I still have my aunt and uncle, but I'm not by myself. It's absolutely terrifying. I miss my dad so terribly, and I'm afraid every day about what's going to happen to me (as absolutely selfish as that is).

I'm really not very good at anything besides English. I do some proofreading on fanfiction for fun, as well as to pass the time. I think I'd go crazy if I had absolutely nothing to do. So, on that note... it's nice to meet all of you! Sorry for the long tale. ^^;

Hi Tracy and welcome!

My condolences for the lost of your parents. Please don't think you are being selfish by asking questions about what the future holds. That is self advocacy and I commend you for it. Your strength in the face of tragedy is inspiring.

I looked up Fan Fiction and it sounds like a lot of fun. Does it include creating videos of your favorite novels? If so then I am already a fan. I found a guy on YouTube who created a series of videos about my favorite novel Dune. His channel is called Quinn's Ideas and I like it a lot. Do you ever surf on YouTube at all?

Is there any type of Fan Fiction you like most? I'd like to hear about that sometime. Thanks for the tip!

 

[ariinya]

Welcome to the forums!

It took losing my parents and leaving me with no home or family to find out I have Asperger's.
I also had frequent panic attacks that I knew no one else would understand.
Physical problems too, the neuropathy in my feet, fibromyalgia and a degenerating spine.

The loss was more than I could handle, so I had counciling which lead to suggestion of ASD
and testing. I had never even heard of it, but, it all fit when I found out.
I had to move into a house where I could afford the rent on SSI.
An older man I knew that had a big house and wanted someone to live with him
like a caretaker, rented two rooms and bath with kitchen privileges to me.
Believe me, I was so afraid I couldn't keep my panic attacks and anxiety from showing.
What a feeling of being alone when I never had been before in my life.

Do you live alone or with your aunt?
Finding this forum after diagnosis has been very good for me.
Hope you find it helps also. I think you will.

I live alone with my cats. There were four of them but as of yesterday, I had to put one down. RIP Patches.

This apartment is too expensive, so I'm going to have to move out soon. We've submitted my name to three low rent places but no bites so far. And... I don't know if a group home is an option on the table. It was. Until my caseworker came on an unofficial visit, heard me say two words, and made the snap decision that I wasn't "disabled enough to require assistance".

I'm really, really scared. I don't know how to do things that I need to, and some things are unbearably painful. Vacuuming sends this awful pain down my legs and up my spine, eventually to the point where I can't move. I can't force myself to do it anymore. I know I should do a little at a time, just what I can handle, but the thought is starting to send me into panic attacks.

My dad was always more of the type to do things himself than teach me to do them. It was easier, and I just got in the way with my questions and being slow.

I think it will help, if I keep it up. As you can see, I'm not the best at responding. But it's nice to be able to vent and whine a bit without feeling ungrateful.

 

[ariinya]

Hi Tracy and welcome!

My condolences for the lost of your parents. Please don't think you are being selfish by asking questions about what the future holds. That is self advocacy and I commend you for it. Your strength in the face of tragedy is inspiring.

I looked up Fan Fiction and it sounds like a lot of fun. Does it include creating videos of your favorite novels? If so then I am already a fan. I found a guy on YouTube who created a series of videos about my favorite novel Dune. His channel is called Quinn's Ideas and I like it a lot. Do you ever surf on YouTube at all?

Is there any type of Fan Fiction you like most? I'd like to hear about that sometime. Thanks for the tip!

I like fanfiction from Undertale a lot, though I've recently gotten into the Danny Phantom fandom as well. A bit late, since the cartoon came out when I was 16, but there are still people writing new stories and creating art. The Undertale fandom is even more alive. People can create amazing things.

I surf YouTube sometimes, and I also have a bunch of favorite fanmade videos and animations from Undertale. They create comics, music, animations... it's absolutely amazing what some can do. I'm both awed and envious.

Of course it includes novels! There is so much Harry Potter stuff out there, my goodness (I don't count the movies, I absolutely hate them for even existing). I'm sure there is a lot of Dune fanfiction on the website I use to read. It's called "Archive of Our Own", or Ao3.

 

[Aspychata]

Welcome. You have been thru quite a lot. May you find acceptance here and resources and so on.

 

[Sarah S]

="ariinya, post: 696352, member: 24591"]

I'm really, really scared. I don't know how to do things that I need to, and some things are unbearably painful.

" let me try to put this in this way if I with ALL my gazilion diagnosis (and most often High Moderate - Severe level ) managed to learn how to deal lifes different challenges (obviesly with some support around me) im more then shore you can as well . Do you have anyone you feel you could ask for help and support ? "

Vacuuming sends this awful pain down my legs and up my spine, eventually to the point where I can't move. I can't force myself to do it anymore.

" Have you tried putting on some head phones with some music ? that should drain the noice from the vacume cleaner . you could also go with the old fashion broom instead "

I know I should do a little at a time, just what I can handle, but the thought is starting to send me into panic attacks.

" Take ONE tiny step at time and short sessions and increse the time as you feel more comfortable with them. DONT try to force youre self to do longer sessions as that will only increase the anxiety. put on and listen to some nice music and try to breath easy and relax"

My dad was always more of the type to do things himself than teach me to do them. It was easier, and I just got in the way with my questions and being slow.

" Thats compleatly wrong way as you now sadly have to see youre self before my mom got to sick she started to teach (and yes force me in a gentle way ) to learn how to do my bills on line for example . This is what i mean with you need someone that you feel you can trust and that is willing and able to support you and help you learn how to do things "

I think it will help, if I keep it up. As you can see, I'm not the best at responding. But it's nice to be able to vent and whine a bit without feeling ungrateful.

" you just come in when YOU feel you whant to neither one of us are in any particular hurry as far as ive seen so far "

 

[rollerskate]

I just want to note that seizures can and often do impact cognition, memory, and motor. Also, someone who has seizures cannot live alone. They need someone around that can call 911 if it's needed, as well as to keep an eye out for them and try to prevent falls.

I have no idea how to advise you really because I have no family, no friends, can't seem to get supporting myself alone down for more than 6 months, and your concerns mirror my own. I try not to think about what will happen to me when I'm old, or if I become too disabled to do most things for myself.

One thing I can say is that I've survived, and I've done that by learning how to cope with itmy handicaps so they don't get in the way of my survival. Let this give you hope that you, too, can handle whatever comes your way in the future. <3

 

[Sarah S]

One thing I can say is that I've survived, and I've done that by learning how to cope with itmy handicaps so they don't get in the way of my survival. Let this give you hope that you, too, can handle whatever comes your way in the future. <3

VERY well spoken indeed. As i said before you need to try to Anylize - Adapt according to youre diagnosis and try to make the best of what you have to work with. It CAN be done im a living example of this BUT it will take a lot of tough work and dedikation from youre side (and also some (if possible) support from someone or someones you fel comfortable with and trust that are willing and able to do this.

YOU CAN do this its only a matter of you finding out youre inner strength to do this. ONE step a time and follow youre own pace (NOT stall mind you keep puching forward )