Hello from Simi Valley, CA

[Maky]

Hi, everyone. I'm 45 and have Asperger's. I grew up in rural Illinois, unaware of my condition, and struggled with it for decades. In my mid-30s, my mother learned about the condition from a friend with a young autistic child and suggested I learn about it. For several years, I went undiagnosed due to lack of health insurance, but I finally got diagnosed a few years ago. I can't say it's helped anything, but good to know. It's also nice to stop getting sneers from people who are sick of self-diagnoses.

Since then, I've helped several friends realize their condition, though none of them have sought a diagnosis for fear of the stigma. Once I learned the symptoms, I've learned to spot the condition in both men and women with ease.

I may also have alexithymia or at least a mild version of it. There's no value in getting that diagnosed. And once again I'm without insurance, so it's definitely not worth paying for out of pocket. I'm curious to hear more from people with that related condition as well.

 

[Streetwise]

Hi, everyone. I'm 45 and have Asperger's. I grew up in rural Illinois, unaware of my condition, and struggled with it for decades. In my mid-30s, my mother learned about the condition from a friend with a young autistic child and suggested I learn about it. For several years, I went undiagnosed due to lack of health insurance, but I finally got diagnosed a few years ago. I can't say it's helped anything, but good to know. It's also nice to stop getting sneers from people who are sick of self-diagnoses.

Since then, I've helped several friends realize their condition, though none of them have sought a diagnosis for fear of the stigma. Once I learned the symptoms, I've learned to spot the condition in both men and women with ease.

I may also have alexithymia or at least a mild version of it. There's no value in getting that diagnosed. And once again I'm without insurance, so it's definitely not worth paying for out of pocket. I'm curious to hear more from people with that related condition as well.

Tell your friends it's better to have a diagnosis neurotypicals(people with typical neurology or the majority of people on planet earth)respect a diagnosis parents sometimes feel insulted but if it says Dr or professor they become respectful they probably wouldn't respect your diagnosis as they know nothing of the state of psychiatry.

 

[Maky]

Tell your friends it's better to have a diagnosis neurotypicals(people with typical neurology or the majority of people on planet earth)respect a diagnosis parents sometimes feel insulted but if it says Dr or professor they become respectful they probably wouldn't respect your diagnosis as they know nothing of the state of psychiatry.

I've tried all that, but most are fine with just acknowledging that they're different and don't want the stigma, even privately. Most have learned to cope/mask and have done so for decades. And honestly, I can't say that a diagnosis has done much for me. It just shuts people up about the formal diagnosis, and then they lay into me about using it as an excuse. The few social programs I've looked into also proved useless, so I'm on my own. I'm used to that, and there's nothing anyone can do to help me anyway. I've been blacklisted from my field of work, and no government program or agency can fix that except the courts... and we all know how much of a joke the legal system is in the U.S. ("You get the 'justice' you can afford.")

As I said, I'm mostly here to see if others can discuss alexithymia since it's a related condition. I can't afford to get it diagnosed, and most diagnoses require interviews with family and friends -- none of whom will help me. (My family and I split over politics, and friends won't want to get involved.)

 

[Streetwise]

I've tried all that, but most are fine with just acknowledging that they're different and don't want the stigma, even privately. Most have learned to cope/mask and have done so for decades. And honestly, I can't say that a diagnosis has done much for me. It just shuts people up about the formal diagnosis, and then they lay into me about using it as an excuse. The few social programs I've looked into also proved useless, so I'm on my own. I'm used to that, and there's nothing anyone can do to help me anyway. I've been blacklisted from my field of work, and no government program or agency can fix that except the courts... and we all know how much of a joke the legal system is in the U.S. ("You get the 'justice' you can afford.")

As I said, I'm mostly here to see if others can discuss alexithymia since it's a related condition. I can't afford to get it diagnosed, and most diagnoses require interviews with family and friends -- none of whom will help me. (My family and I split over politics, and friends won't want to get involved.)

No different in the UK, slightly worse in France they are very hung up on the idea of Autism =boys,I was only diagnosed because i really !!!!!!!wasn't masking and was diagnosed 6 months after referral ,but in my area of the UK ,there is an autism diagnosis team ,everywhere else it's different,disability law awareness is very very sparse in the UK people are still suffering,but I ram it home whenever I can manage!covid 19 era has been one of the most infuriating times for autism in the uk,I wouldn't dare go anywhere without a facemask, even though I'm gasping after 5 minutes walking and England isn't as big as the North American countries so my lungs don't care about distance to anywhere.

 

[Maky]

No different in the UK, slightly worse in France they are very hung up on the idea of Autism =boys,I was only diagnosed because i really !!!!!!!wasn't masking and was diagnosed 6 months after referral ,but in my area of the UK ,there is an autism diagnosis team ,everywhere else it's different,disability law awareness is very very sparse in the UK people are still suffering,but I ram it home whenever I can manage!covid 19 era has been one of the most infuriating times for autism in the uk,I wouldn't dare go anywhere without a facemask, even though I'm gasping after 5 minutes walking and England isn't as big as the North American countries so my lungs don't care about distance to anywhere.

Sorry to hear that. The lockdowns haven't changed anything for me. As a middle-aged single male, I'm always socially isolated, even before the pandemic. Most people treat solitary middle-aged men as would-be rapists. Guilty until proven innocent... Ya know, the usual.

Since my best friend (a lemur I used to care for at a zoo) died last May, I've had almost no reason to go outside except to buy groceries and run occasional errands. My more social friends, however, are suffering, so I can empathize. I hope it gets better for you soon.

 

[Streetwise]

Sorry to hear that. The lockdowns haven't changed anything for me. As a middle-aged single male, I'm always socially isolated, even before the pandemic. Most people treat solitary middle-aged men as would-be rapists. Guilty until proven innocent... Ya know, the usual.

Since my best friend (a lemur I used to care for at a zoo) died last May, I've had almost no reason to go outside except to buy groceries and run occasional errands. My more social friends, however, are suffering, so I can empathize. I hope it gets better for you soon.

Most of the time I go to the bin ,back to the house,I rarely go to the supermarket,sorry about your friend, there's nothing to take the pain of grief, time makes it less raw ,but it's still there,21 years for my mother not really any better,other animal friends just more and more recent,I wonder if somewhere in my mind I stopped travelling by train because i experienced a train crash ,hasn't registered.

 

[Alexej]

Hi @Maky

Welcome to the Forums. There are some threads about alexithymia and how people have responded and are responding. Try using the search engine - its not too bad.

 

[Crossbreed]

Hello & welcome.

And once again I'm without insurance, so it's definitely not worth paying for out of pocket.

See Autlanders, Thriving Outside of the Box: Finding Support Resources in the USA...

(I grew up in Oxnard. I'm in northern Wisconsin, now.)

 

[Thinx]

Hi and welcome, I hope you enjoy it here and find it useful and supportive.

 

[Skittlebisquit]

Sorry to hear that. The lockdowns haven't changed anything for me. As a middle-aged single male, I'm always socially isolated, even before the pandemic. Most people treat solitary middle-aged men as would-be rapists. Guilty until proven innocent... Ya know, the usual.

Since my best friend (a lemur I used to care for at a zoo) died last May, I've had almost no reason to go outside except to buy groceries and run occasional errands. My more social friends, however, are suffering, so I can empathize. I hope it gets better for you soon.

There were some great posts on alexy themia(sp) from a thread a few weeks ago. There is a search feature, and too you can ask Tree. Its about a lack of emotionality, or something like that. All the fancy talk and big words you can find with just the word like "schizotypal" or " narcissism" will often turn up stuff in a title

 

[Skittlebisquit]

K i fibbed. The search doesnt work well on a phone at all. Its been a current topic. I think the only way i would seek a diagnosis for (alexithemia) that would be to have a counter to accusations of psychopathy. Oh the spelling has to be correct in search too i think.

 

[Magna]

Welcome.

 

[VictorR]

Welcome!

 

[SusanLR]

Welcome to the forums!

There are posts on alexithemia.
Inability to express, understand the emotions of self and others.

I understand my emotions all too well. Hope you find answers from those who experience it here.

 

[Alexej]

alexithemia Oh the spelling has to be correct in search too i think.

Try using the spelling alexythmia - the y in the middle makes a difference (to the search engine)

 

[clg114]

Welcome to Autism Forums!

 

[Skittlebisquit]

Try using the spelling alexythmia - the y in the middle makes a difference (to the search engine)

Thank you. I find the search feature difficult, as the hyperlinks are very small and not conyrasting colors

 

[tree]

Spoiler: alexithymia

Alexithymia - Wikipedia