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Got a story to tell?

Reedstorm17

Well-Known Member
Is there a story you really want to tell? That maybe you've already told some people, haven't told anyone, or people have stopped listening to because you've told it too many times?

Tell any story. It could be something that happened today or something that happened years ago. Just share it!
 
I killed a spider the other day. I hate spiders, yet I can't help but feel bad about it. I mean, it's just a spider. It didn't ask to be a spider, it can't be anything but a spider, and it doesn't even know it's a spider. Yet I summarily executed it for the crime of simply being a spider. I feel like a monster.
 
A long, long time ago I learned how to cast a spell. It really is not very hard, as long as the procedure is followed exactly. First you need a eye lash from the eye of a white goat. One hair, no more. Seal the hair in a new earthen pot and bury it in a dung pile for 15 days. After exactly 15 days, dig the pot up and break it open. Inside you will find a small serpent. Kill the serpent with a knife that has never been used before. Dry the serpent in the sun for one week. After the week is up, grind the serpent up into a fine powder. To cast a spell, in the light of the full moon, you simply sprinkle a bit of the powder on the object or person you want to cast a spell on. After the powder has been dispersed, say the words "Dring, Drang". The spell is cast.

Now, you may very well wonder how I learned to do this. It is because of my love of motorcycles. When I was a young man, not only did I own several motorcycles, I was really into building model motorcycles. But I wanted something different, something really unique. I was told about a small shop that sold very unusual models. It was located in a bad part of the town and was very creepy looking, but I went in anyway. There was a very old man in there and I explained what I was looking for. With out saying a word, he disappeared into the back of the shop and was gone a long time. I was about to leave when he finally came back. He had a box with a picture of the 1953 AJS motocross bike that Lenny Smith rode in the 1953 British Gran Prix.The model even came with a rider that looked like Smith. It was very detailed, everything was the same. It even came with a little packet of dust to sprinkle on it, so that it looked it just got done racing a moto. It was very expensive, but I had to have it. I took it home and went right to work on it. By the time I got it done, it was almost midnight. All that was left was to sprinkle the dust on. I didn't want to get the dust all over my table so I turned the porch light on and took the motorcycle out to the driveway. I set it on the driveway and tore the packet open. As I was sprinkling the dust on the motorcycle, I noticed that something was printed on the packet. The moon was full, but I could not read it by the moon light. So I turned around to read it by the porch light. I read the words out loud, it said "Dring,Drang". Then I heard what sounded like a tiny engine running. I turned around just in time to my model motorcycle racing down the driveway, into the darkness. Never to be seen again.
 
18 years ago I went for an interview while i was on the JSA, at a local Taxi firm answering the phone, I didn't really want the job bought I was under pressure from the Job Centre to attend at least 1 interview a week, so I thought sod it I'll apply for this one.

Anyway off I went, and when i got there they said the job had already gone to a Teenager on the government's "New Deal" program, I was like, WTF? This wasn't the first time I'd trekked across Town for an interview to find the job was already gone, so, in the temper from hell, I got Mum to drive me to the Job Centre and went on a long swear word and Scouse accent filled rant to the Manager about how I was fed up of being messed about and I was coming OFF the Dole, effective immediately.

I felt a lot better after that, I had no money, but that didn't matter, better to be penniless than suffer from that bunch of Jobsworths.
 
About that spider killing... How many times have you been bitten by a spider? And how many times have you killed a spider or witnessed someone killing a spider? Notice the difference.

Okay, so today in the elective I take where I basically get to write all the time, I decided to print out part two of my book. Double-sided, it was 35 pages. So I went to the library to retrieve it, and I had to wait while every page printed, and this one person was trying to print an essay or something. Of course he had to wait a few minutes...
 
It was January 29 last year when I wrote the first draft of chapter 51 in my first book. The end of that chapter brought the death of a great character named Tucker, on May 10 in the story. He was (IS, because he will never die as long as the earlier chapters exist) quite hilarious. On his friend's half birthday, he gave him half a paper clip and told him fractions of birthdays were about as pointless. He died heroically, swerving off the highway to avoid hitting and killing two other people.
 
I killed a spider the other day. I hate spiders, yet I can't help but feel bad about it. I mean, it's just a spider. It didn't ask to be a spider, it can't be anything but a spider, and it doesn't even know it's a spider. Yet I summarily executed it for the crime of simply being a spider. I feel like a monster.

Well, tbh, you are. To spiders. Your the big horrible spider killing monster.

Spiders (nearly all ) are cool and can keep your house cleaner (they kill pests - for food). If they are in a remote location just say hi spider and live and let live. If they are where they shouldn't be, move them to garage or outside. Just learn if there are any dangerous spiders in your area and how to identify them. I have these ginormous spiders, like two inches accross, living in my basement. They never come upstairs. I rarely see other bugs. I tell my wife I killed them when she complains. :D
 
Once when I was five, I was playing with Barbies or Pollies or something, and it was one of their "birthdays." So they get presents, right?

So I used construction paper as wrapping paper and wrapped random things, but then I couldn't find tape. I found a roll of those little stickers that you put at the top of a letter with the return address, and I used that as tape. Then I got caught...
 
I flushed my father's tennis balls down the toilet
when I was 3. I wanted to see what would happen.

What happened was people got excited because
water started gushing from the toilet on to the bathroom
floor, out into the living room.
 
I'm guessing you got in trouble.

My dad just missed his flight because he was talking to us on the phone for five minutes. The flight isn't taking off for another fifteen minutes, but they still won't let him on.
 
@Reedstorm

Actually, no I didn't.
Nobody thought I did it to be bad or make a problem.
Just to see what would happen.
Just to watch them go down, basically.
 
I killed a spider the other day. I hate spiders, yet I can't help but feel bad about it. I mean, it's just a spider. It didn't ask to be a spider, it can't be anything but a spider, and it doesn't even know it's a spider. Yet I summarily executed it for the crime of simply being a spider. I feel like a monster.

I killed a centipede at my gym last month :(
 
I got robbed today. Someone stole my backpack. I found it three hours later with all the pockets open, and my notebook missing. Of course, they also took 20 dollars, but it's the notebook I'm upset about...
 

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