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Feel intimidated with "Business". Anybody feeling the same? Or how did you do business?

BlueSky Aozora

Well-Known Member
There is a thing bothering me from long time ago.. It's about how to make money, specifically business. In almost every financial advice, or tutorials, or e-books out there, they will mention about business.

How to get more money? Side income? Do business. (Yes there are others like properties, stocks etc., but the one bothering me the most is business, and also side income business.

The thing is, in the many things they taught about how to 'creatively' make our own businesses is, ...we need to deal with other people. Networking, finding people who are willing to deal with us, convincing them.. finding customers.. They make all these look so easy.

Ok I know doing business is not easy, very difficult. But, I feel like it's especially hard for me, compared to other normal people. Am I wrong in feeling like this, am I too spoiled?

Even dealing with people for long hours make me feel tired. Or even if I don't meet the people, the idea that I need to rely on somebody, I don't like it, and also my inability to find trustworthy people. This is an issue too.

And I have indecisiveness problem - maybe this problem is big, who can do business while being indecisive?

I don't even have a special interest that can be made into a business. Skills? None as well.

Be a dropship agent? You mean, selling other people's products? I dunno, for me, the idea of dropship even feel so foreign & difficult for me. I even feel kinda against businesses, afraid, feel intimidated. Even the idea of business itself feels like my enemy. I feel like a fool, to feel intimidated by this concept.

Any other feel similar like this? Or any of you managed to do business? Do share on how you managed to get started, is it your special interest?


V.I.P Member
It is a difficult and potentially scary thing, sort of. Though, I do think it kinda depends on how you look at and approach it.

While I dont engage in it myself, my family does. My father in particular... he's involved in what I always refer to as "big business". Always has been, for as long as I can remember. Sort of an overseer role in a really big company. So, there are a lot of people he has to manage, a lot of connections he has to make, meetings that need to be done, negotiations to handle, and even conferences that require travelling. Fortunately he's able to do this (well, not the travel part) from his office here in the house (and my stepmother does all these things as well from her office in the house here, she works in the same industry).

I always think that it looks so difficult and confusing... all that networking with people, problem solving, and so on. But, well... something I've said about a bazillion times to people on this forum is that attitude and outlook matter. He is the reason why I say that and the one who taught me about it. He doesnt succeed at what he does through some magic inherited skill or crazy luck... he succeeds because he projects that air of confidence around him, and when it's time to get things done, or time to solve a problem, he just bloody well does it.

And from listening to and watching him (and others) over the years, it seems that truly is THE important thing when you're dealing with "business"... it's not just a cliche'd line that I keep repeating over and over for no reason. You have to be able to deal with others with confidence. Even if you're feeling nervous inside, you gotta tell yourself you'll achieve today's goals anyway. That's how it works, and that's what makes a businessperson able to do what they do. After all, if YOU arent showing confidence in what you and your company can do... other people and companies aint gonna have confidence in you being able to do it either, and the prospect of dealing with you and/or your company will start to appear to them as a financial risk. And that aint viable in the business world, not one bit.

It's not an easy thing (running a business or projecting that confidence) and anyone who tells you otherwise is lying. But that doesnt mean you cant do it, if it is something you'd like to do.

The trick though as you said is... how to get started? That's not something anyone can really tell you. It's different for everyone that does it! But what I can say is, if you'd like to go down this sort of road, dont worry about the what-ifs and such for now. Just do some searching. What sort of thing do you think you'd like to make a business out of, or what sort of industry do you think you'd be interested in joining? There's so many possibilities! But it's up to YOU to find that answer, nobody can find it for you. This goes for skills as well. Nobody starts out knowing how to, I dunno, make chairs or something. You have to put in the time to learn the related skill for whatever you want to do.

You can do it though, whatever "it" is, as long as you refuse to give up. And as long as you take the time to do the research and learn things. There's always more to learn with this sort of thing.

Am I making any sense here? I'm not 100% sure if I am or not.

Gerald Wilgus

Well-Known Member
V.I.P Member
My niche was not to create a business. I found that I enjoyed manufacturing: designing , testing and uptimizing processes. I have a couple of patents on cyclotron targetry and processing of radionuclides, but primarily I was involved with process and product quality in pharmaceuticals.


Well-Known Member
V.I.P Member
I had a small side business for quite a long time. Maybe 20 years. But for me it was based on a special interest which is toy soldiers and some fantasy figures (Lord of the Rings).

At first I sold thru adverts in magazines and then online. In both it was easier then having to deal with people face to face. Online especially was easier as I don't interact well on the spur of the moment and I always had time to think about what I would say.

Having been a buyer first gave me some idea what sellers did. I did have to go thru a learning curve to learn the rules/economics of sites that allow selling and Ebay of course, and also shipping.

I think a main advantage was I was dealing in an interest that I already had a basically expert level in. I knew what things were and what they were worth. You have to know what you can pay for something and make a reasonable profit on.

I also worked hard to establish a good reputation with good items and customer service. My hobby is a small world and word gets around. I did get messed over once in a while, but it was actually very rare. (The same word about bad buyers also gets around), like maybe 1-300 deals.

I also dealt internationally which some will not do, and that was probably 40% of my business. Being willing to do the extra work selling overseas requires widened my market.


Well-Known Member
V.I.P Member
Well, this is why I always preferred working in an organisation, being employed rather than self employed, for the reasons you mention!

However, at the same time I do think in many ways Aspies are well suited to being self employed, as it allows us to be in control and to be independent and be doing our own thing. Like say looking after others pets, walking dogs , breeding animals etc. If it's a big interest it can work. Do you have a strong interest or a lot of experience in something?

You do need to look into the rules and regulations around your business, and work out whether it would actually make money of course. As big companies can often do stuff cheaply and undercut small businesses. Like you say, you need a niche.

In the UK there are organisations who help people develop a new business idea. Could you take a class or find out who may offer newbies support with this?


V.I.P Member
Why not focus on getting more money from working rather than worrying about business?

Possibly the nature of it.

In far too many cases "working" means "do some soul-sucking activity to make the CEO of some giant company a bunch of money while getting little yourself". It's one of the big inspirations for many people to decide to try something on their own.

Though, even with a normal "job", if you get promoted enough (or depending on what you get hired for in the first place), depending on the industry you may find yourself in a position where you do, indeed, need to deal with business stuff.


Well-Known Member
V.I.P Member
It can feel safer just being employed, especially if you have some significant differences in the way you communicate. Leadership styles differ, but I found my lead from behind kind of style was sometimes misunderstood. I try to hear and to enable. But some people have win or lose, achieve or get trodden on, firmly in mind by the time they are at work. So they see this style as weakness I guess.

I am also fairly straightforward and ethically minded, which fit ok with counselling leadership generally, but was again, not always liked by other non clinical managers who wanted to steam on through the ethical guidelines and make something happen. But you can't keep your accredited status that way, unfortunately.

Some don't mind that. But as a clinical manager I had to and did. Though I was also always keen to find ways that were both ethically acceptable and progressed the tasks. Not always easy but often doable with outside the box thinking.

Management roles are not for everyone I think, and for some a small self employed role can give more overall satisfaction, if doable. Starting small and building knowledge and confidence, perhaps?


Active Member
Running a business well relies on having a specific set of skills that not everyone has. I know quite a few electricians who excel at things like motor controls, common point troubleshooting, running big jobs and other areas of expertise that have obtained a C10 license and failed at running a business.

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